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Some people just need to grow up. A failed relationship is generally the product of 2 people fucking up. Sometimes, one of the people in said failed relationship will try to put all of the blame on the other person in order to make themselves feel better/less guilty about their part in fucking things up. I question this logic. Does it make one feel better to try to blame the other person, when in the end, its still just another failure? How many times is that nessecary before they begin to realize how childish this response is? Do people even realize it? Sometimes its funny, because no matter what response you give, what you say, they're always going to twist it to be your fault. Its never going to be right, or good enough. Thats where I'm at. I feel like a fool after this sort of thing personally, and generally just want to be left alone in my humility. Thats how I feel, small and humiliated and foolish.



But I guess just wanting to be left alone isn't good enough. The person knows you loved them, and somehow in a sick twisted way it makes them feel better about how miserable their life is to put you down, rub your nose in the things you've done wrong, and generally make you feel like some defunct piece of trash.





Merry fucking christmas.

I get the feeling again that I'm being pushed away. When I think back about it, it all leads back to a point where I was bluntly honest. Since that moment, I feel like I've been kept at a distance. I don't find it very fair. I reach out to try, my heart on my sleeve, and I get a great lot of nothing back. I don't ask questions anymore, I know there are no answers for me. Other people, possibly. But not me. So all I have left is to try, and I'm left with the feeling that nothing I do will be enough.



So what the fuck does that leave me with? My heart on my sleeve, and a whole lot of empty hopes...

Anyone out there a writer?



I have a question. Why is it I seem to be able to really hit that creative root in times of severe emotional stress?



I've written when happy. It never comes out sounding as good as when someone rips my heart out of my fucking chest.



Whats up with that?

COMMENTS

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Sinora
18:07 Dec 02 2008

Maybe because your stress needs an outlet more urgently than your other emotional states ?

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