jealousy has crept back in again. it seems to want to stick around. tho i push it away ever so hard. it rears its ugly head. i wish i could control this jealousy. but this morning it wants to hold my hand and walk the day with me.' why i ask?'" because of love" she says. 'i don't want it 'i reply. she says "it doesn't matter, i am here." i try ever so hard to push her away. just to have her wrap her arms around me. she says"it's been too long". and i cry. because it is a felling i am too familiar with. my heart bleeds.
so send your blood this way, so that i may heal. hopefully,slowly.maybe... she will go away.
i am having trouble with these two. i Love vampires and the suckling of blood, the intimacy, the rawness of their power,the lust. but i can't find anyone that fits this description,ever. maybe its because for the past nine years i have been kept inside and kept away from these wondrous creatures of the night.
i like werewolves because they are the protectors of the vampires, day walkers. which is more for me with my night disability, however, i can't find any of these walking around either.
i desire these two, which may never come my way to even have a chance to desire me back.
if anyone reads this that is a vamp or a were please send them this way, they will be welcomed with open arms
today is warm no rain. i am glad. rain makes me sad. i had company but they went home. i don't like to be alone. it sux. i am being lazy, watchin the boob tube. lol chillin with my daughter. lets fire one up . so i guess i'm not alone. am i? well, lets say on a certain level i am by myself. if you are reading this, fire one up and enjoy. xoxo
for christmas, my bff , beth, baked ma a cake. it is so delicious it should be labeled a sin. lol and i have been extra greedy and ate two pieces every day til its almost gone. Damn it! Give me cake! This is crazy i know. but that's me.
i met this groovy guy on here today. he seems very interesting. and he bit me, which i enjoy, ALOT . i hope we stay friends forever lol
Well today is the 24th of December. I am alone because the kids are gone to their dads. I miss them. I guess I will enjoy the quiet and get a lil tipsy. :>
COMMENTS
-