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I fucking hate her... She sucks at teaching and almost EVERY one it failing her class.. I had to stay for mandatory tutoring..

She kept asking me about what I think about the benchmark... I told her I didnt try because I know I will fail the TAKS. Due to the fact I have learned nothing at all from her. I told her, her teaching skills suck and some other shit... Then she said you havent learned anything b/c of your attitude.. I told her I wasnt giving you attitude... I will if she keeps talking to me...

I walked out, before I lost it. I was getting furious...

Hmm... Lack of bleeding causes frusteration...

~=[

Plus I am fucking dreading this summer... I wont be able to see AshNight that much.. It makes me sick to think about that...

I am acually frightened about that...

I want to fucking rip someones throat out. Just to rid this anger.

*cannibal hugs*

I love AshNIght.

~Freak13

Well I just found out how open minded some mods are on here...

I posted a subject on the forums, about I not being able to bleed. He thought I was lying. The pure nerve of people.



Anyway I am asking any of you to message me if you know what I can do to get myself to bleed...

I cut, The flesh rips deeply. No blood. If their is it is just a drop or two. I am getting really frusterated. I want to give blood to my lover. My body wont let me though.. I have tried legs, arms, neck, even my chest... and nothing.

Please help people.



I love AshNight.

~Freak13

Today wasent as "wonderful" as I thought it would be.



I was looking forward to the Blood Bond with AshNight. My luck we "didnt get around to it" today.



Plus a demon is on my shit list. Funny because I



befriend demons more than hate them.



But again my luck.



I cant do anything right. Even if my sad ass tries.



Still nothing but failure.



Nothing but pain.



Every thing working for me to go insane....er.



Hey that almost all rhymed.



Almost.



Never Fully.



Never fully anything.



PMS.

SOme one broke into my dads truck.... WTF?

Dumb asses took a cheap now nonworking radio and that is it...

De De De....



Well Fuck!

~Freak13

Today has been slow,

I have been worried off my ass. Also stressed out by my family. But hey who isnt?

Well anyway.

I am looking forward to tomarrow.

The blood ritual will be nice.

Mmm..

I love AshNight.



Oh yeah random but I am getting sick and tired of the fuckers that think they are fat.....

They need Ayds....

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/videos/aydsdiet.html



PLUR-ING out!

~Freak13

I love AshNight forevermore

FUCK!!

MY MIND!!!

I would love to kill it..

AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhh!

Meh.... This weekend will suck!

Monday-Wensday should be better. I am doing a blood bond thing with Ash NIght.

Some questions,not by me, are making me kind of pissed. But w/e I am sick of my reasponses to things. FUCK! I am also getting randomly pissed off. I want to scream ,rip out of my hair and cry.

help.. I ask for it .. but I have no clue how anyone could help.

I am hungry.. Flesh....mmmm... Fuck I am slowly devoring my fingers. I am catching myself bitting off and eating the flesh that is around my nails. I feel the flesh slip into my mouth then throat. Slowly Europhia kicks in.

Anyway fuckers.

I am hungry, tired, pissed, and depressed.

What ever, I shall go on acting like it is all okay. To advoid people asking me "whats wrong" BLAH.. I dont know to be honest.

Well fuck this.

I love Ashnight in life and death.

Ash spent the night last night and the night before. It was ... good.. ..> =].

I love her more than I ever thought I could love anyone. I feel bad I was half asleep when she called after she went home. I want to talk to her, now I am more awake, yet she is hanging out with one of her friends . Owell I will see her tomarrow at school. =]



The weather has been rainy and lovely. I love this gloomy weather. It is only 2:00PM yet I feel like it is 6:00PM. Due to the gloomy weather.



My family went to my grandparents and should return today. I am NOT looking forward to their return. Yay. My mother yelling and being a bitch to make others missarable. My brother running around squeeling like a dieing pig, and breaking shit (He never gets punished for his actions). My dad on the computer always, and talking about me behind my back. My entire family making fun of me and taunting me to the point of provoking my homicidal tendencies.

Anyway their returns is truley regretted.



Well my level whent up to a marplot. Yay me!

Now to beat this one. I am addicted to this site. It is better than xanga. My love says different though. heh. VR RAPES AND MURDERS ALL OTHER BLOG/FORUM STUFF!!!



So yeah.

*cannibal hugs*

I love AshNight in life, death, bad times, good times, times i am not all "there", Just forever more. My love for her will NEVER die!

I am going to six flags BYTCHES! woot!

Watch, my luck I will pass out BEFORE I get there. Meh.. Moo. I will like it. SQUEEE! I wanna ride the titain ova and ova and ova again! =]

Well g2g

I love AshNight. For eva and eva and eva more!

*kisses to her*

I am ok today. Tomarrow I get to go to 6 flags! *dances like a child with a crack covered lolli*

AshNight might be able to spend the night at my house to! =].

Well Yah all is smooth..

~Freak13

Off to prance around and clean with my fairy broom and lysol of DOOM.

blah

Today might just be okay. I am going to the Arcade with my friend/sister Sousui and MY lover AshNight. YaYah! =] *prances*

I wanna prance more...

*prances more*

This is fucking fun...

Freak prances even more*

Freak squeeks*

=]

~Freak13

Freak loves her AshNight..

Freak cant wait to see her!!!

=]

=]

==]]

"MOTHER FUCKER YOU DONT UNDERSTAND ALL MY HATE!



MOTHER FUCKER YOU DONT UNDERSTAND ALL MY RAGE!



MOTHER FUCKER YOU DONT UNDERSTAND ALL MY PAIN!" -Soulfly-Jumpdafuckup



FUCK!

That is all I can say now...

I wish things where clearer to me.

I wish my fucking mother would realize that I will never leave AshNight. I am sick of my mom dwelling on ONE fucking thing. Then using that as a excuse to hate us being together. Just because my mother is in a realationship that has fucking gone to hell. She wants that to happen to us to because she wants us to go through what she has been through. BITCH!

Fuck..



I am PISSED!

~Freak13

I love Ash in life and death.





-Soulfly-JumpDaFuckUp-



Jumpdafuckup!



Muthafucka u don't understand

All my hate!

Muthafucka u don't understand

All my rage!

Muthafucka u don't understand

All my pain!

Muthafucka u don't understand...



You seem to sever all my frequencies

I'm tethered to your energies

And everything turns inside out

I can't be killed but I'm not too proud



Maybe you would like to peek through the curtain

At the same mistake you know you always make

But...all I really want to know is

Are you gonna lay the fuck back down

Or jump da fuck up?



Walking in da streets and looking at all this shit

I'm full of hate, don't fuck with me

Walking in da streets and looking at all this shit

Open up your eyes and fucking see

We got the tribe against society

We got to fight the real enemy

Get da fuck up, stand da fuck up

Back da fuck up



All this is making things a bit insane

And I don't care who stares or stays

The only thing that matters is

Will you reach out if you can't resist?



Maybe you don't give a shit for the rest of us

But if you do, the time is now, if it ever was

If you're gonna fight, whatcha gonna do?

Jump da fuck up!



Muthafucka u don't understand

All my hate!

Muthafucka u don't understand

All my rage!

Muthafucka u don't understand

All my pain!

Muthafucka u don't understand...



How dare you single out my honesty

Compare me to your travesties

I only want to see you fight

The darkness you wanna live your life by



And if you're gonna quit

I don't give a shit

What the fuck, I'm a Mack truck

Are you gonna give up like a bitch

Or jump da fuck up?



Walking in da streets and looking at all this shit

I'm full of hate, don't fuck with me

Walking in da streets and looking at all this shit

Open up your eyes and fucking see

We got the tribe against society

We got to fight the real enemy

Get da fuck up, stand da fuck up

Muthafuckaaaaaaaarrggghhhh



I'm a self-destructive piece of shit

Smear me in

I don't owe you a goddamn thing

This life has never had the swing

I don't wanna be immortal or legend or anything

Cuz the longer I'm alive, the better off you'll be

Get ready for epitome, come on and pity me...

Will you kill me if I say please?



I'm the same old reasons not to try

What the hell

Beat to death with a shovel and a new smell

Come and get me, mom would never let me do it

I'm ruined, I don't want anything from you

Cuz I've got nothing left to prove, c'mon

My time, everything feels fine, goodbye

Killing from the inside

Well I am bored. Also dreading spring break.

I do hope somehow I can get money and buy "Satanic Rituals" by Anton Szandor LeVay. I have the "Satanic Bible" I read it so much the book is about to fall apart.



Anyway.

Spring break will suck because I cant be around my love as much as I can being at school, and all. Thanks to my bitch ass mother!



I am eating ranch and chips. I love the sour cream+ Sesoning = ranch, shit. Mmmm ranch...

Mmm white stuff...



Well that is all for now.. I think...



~Freak13

I love AshNight!

I am starting to really hate those "socails"... erm.

as Kriss would say

"Angst!"

Today was ok.

Haha. There was a fire alarm today. It was not real.. erm I want the school to burn.. =].



anyways i am fucking freaking out because I think I might be failing Geometry and Spanish. I hate Spanish, and Geometry is easy except for all this shit we are doing now. Yah I want to pass.. I want to get the fuck away from my house.



Well today was stressfull but not the worst.

~Freak13

Woah.

Wow until today I rarely have seen Ash laugh in a humorious way, rather than a murderious/insane way.

I love when she laughs out of being humored.

I love when she smiles out of happiness.

I love her.

I wish I could make her laugh and smile like that more often.



=/

My school is fucking pathetic.

They did a knock off of match.com shit.

Called Iflirts...

You do a survey and they find the 10 most compatible people in the school for you.

I didnt do it because I dont know how my love would respond to me filling it out.

Well she did one.

I should have.

But it feels wrong signing up for something that finds the "most compatible" person in the school.When you are with some one already. Even if you are gay, and the survey is for straights. Meh.

Plus she will get guy stalkers... Oh yay.. Get me all pissed off all over again!.......

Fucking hell why cant I just not care? NO my fucking mind keeps pushing me down.

Screwed over again.

Yay?

Well what did I expect?

If its not one thing it is another.

That is life for you.



All in all ....

I Love AshNight.



~Freak13

Well I feel about as worthless as they come.

I never can make anyone happy even if i fight to the point of losing my identy for them. I cant do anything right and I cant help anyone..

Why is it when I try to help it somehow makes all worse?

Nothing I do will make them happy.

I am worthless.

You will all morn my death for a little bit of time(even if that). Then move on. Just like I wasnt even alive.

I am want my house to catch fire when I am in it alone... and burn me down....

I am getting fucking sick and tired of people who do shit to make others happy. Even if in the end that person will betray them.. Also I am fucking sick and tired of people who try to tear people apart ......

Over all I am sick of social people...

Sick of the mainstream...

Sick of the popular fucks.......

Sick of the humanistic stupidity.....

Sick of society...

Fuck it all!



I FUCKING HATE PEOPLE!

I am so out of it in every way.

I just want to sleep and never awake.

I feel like shit.

I cant think.

Fuck.

Fuck.

Blah is me

Me is blah



Something bad will happen VERY soon..

But what?

FUCK and SEX