The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

1 1/2 oz Canadian whisky

1/2 oz ruby port

1 egg yolk

1 tsp grenadine syrup



There are times when we wish to close the door on the past. There are times when we wish to lock away the past. And then there are times when we wish to run screaming from the past as it chases us up from the basement of our minds...with us tripping on the stairs so that our past almost catches up with us but we manage to move just in time to escape it's claws, slam the door to the basement shut, lock the door, chain the door and then nail and board the door closed in hopes of forever escaping that particular moment of our lives...



...or is that just me?



Either way, this potion has been created to help us in such endeavors. Whether you look at this as a way to relive that one moment and correct some mistakes in your life, or whether you look at this as being unconscious in a pool of vomit as you dream about reliving that moment is up to you. Either way, when you return to the present, or wake up (or get woken up with a cold bucket of ice water by your significant other)...the fact is that you won't be able to discern that which is memory of what happened, from that which is fantasy of what could have happened. So enjoy the cloudy moment. Maybe you did change that mistake in your past...maybe you were running around the neighborhood in your underwear thinking you were changing that mistake in the past...have another glass and it will all work out.



Now this potion works in varying levels of potency depending on the various levels of stupid that you have committed in the past. Scale ingredients as necessary or repeat dosage. Hit on your best friend? Couple glasses of this potion should do the trick. Wake up naked next to your best friend? Better bust out the pitcher and get to work. Mix the ingredients...say the accompanying magic words "I shoulda coulda woulda" and drink it.



Side Effects:

Those magic words get more difficult to say with each dosage...but don't worry! The magic required by the words becomes less and less necessary with each dosage as well...so the harder it is to say them...the more this potion is already working!



Too much of this potion and you will create some NEW mistakes that need changing...and unfortunately, mistakes made while under the influence of this potion are more difficult to change.



Oh and there is that whole previously mentioned 'unconscious in a puddle of vomit' bit that has been a source of complaints every now and again. Yeah...sorry 'bout that...Good luck!