From
Fifteen Painted Cards
From A Vampire Tarot
by Neil Gaiman
THE WORLD
"You know the saddest thing?"
she said.
"The saddest thing is
that we're you."
I said nothing.
"In your fantasies,"
she said,
"my people are just like you,
only better. We don't die,
or age, or suffer
from pain or cold or thirst.
We're snappier dressers.
We possess
the wisdom of ages.
And if we crave blood,
well, it is no more than
the way you people crave food,
or affection, or sunlight --
and besides,
it gets us out
of the house,
crypt,
coffin.
Whatever."
"And the truth is?" I asked her...
Other people's obvious talent at things makes me so jealous. The ability to write well, to draw, sing, paint. To command a room. To speak, and be heard. To make friends. To attract lovers. To keep lovers.
And here I am swamped in my mediocrity hoping to gain by association...
LOOK WHO'S TOP OF THE LIST!!!!
ok... so there's hardly anyone on... I'M STILL EXCITED!!!!
you know while generally speaking i'm happy with my fondness for cupcakes... sometimes i can't stand the drama they generate. what is it with young people and drama!!! and yes i'm fully aware i sound like a crabby old woman right now. i feel like one too. >.>
point in case... cupcake messages me as soon as i get online, which mind you, is about 10 minutes after i wake up from a less than restful sleep and an exceedingly late night. i message back. light flirtatious conversation ensues. cupcake then asks to see me over cam... naked. i reply, can't (and don't particularly wanna). cupcake wants to know when. i say i don't know... which is true, i don't. it would be dependant on not having my mother hanging around. cupcake isn't particularly impressed by this answer and starts to mope. i say, don't worry when i get the house to myself i'll get up to all sorts of mischief. cupcake says, having an orgy are we? i say, no too messy. he says, that's the point. i say, i wouldn't know, never been in one. he calls me boring >.> conversation then dies in the arse, and cupcake logs off. me being the mature adult i am, say meh. end of convo.
meh. wtf is it with you younger people >.>
Heaven cannot be better than this; my journey has ended here.
Walking to work this morning I looked down and saw a mini baggy on the ground... turned it over and my mouth filled with saliva instantly... batman symbol backing and greyish crumbling tablet inside... god it's been years but still I'm craving it. I'm such an idiot. I kept it. It's in my bag. If I were alone...
Yes, very confuzzled. I went to send Sabre a message this morning, because I had added his journal to my fave's list, and just wanted to drop him a line to let him know. And it comes back as, I'm blocked from sending him messages.
WTF?
As far as I know I've never even spoken to the guy, let alone caused anything to make him block me. So Sabre, if you're reading this, can you let me know? Lol. As if.
Today is my 2 month-iversary in here... no cakes for me, though I did apparently gain a new pet. Lol.
And, stupid status system, I've been stuck at 87% of Savant level for like 2 weeks now *grr's*.
In other news, my life is boring *cries*. Today I looked up how much of a payout I'd get from work if I quit on the 1st of December. $18k. Not too shabby, hehe. But not quite enough to keep me in a style to which I could become accustomed =( Unless I withdrew my personal super contributions also... in which case it would probably double, if not more. Hmmmmm....
Maybe I'm just a sour, jealous old bitch but it pisses me off when lil 18 year olds get ratings based purely on the pretty pictures of themselves they put on their profile. Meh. Try adding some content sweethearts, you can't trade off your looks forever.
You know, some days I just really wish I never met you.
11/08/2007 8:06:06 PM Juwee ¤ßlãkè¤ herro
11/08/2007 8:06:21 PM ¤ßlãkè¤ Juwee herro o.O
11/08/2007 8:06:26 PM ¤ßlãkè¤ Juwee hello :P
11/08/2007 8:06:33 PM Juwee ¤ßlãkè¤ you're up late
11/08/2007 8:07:23 PM ¤ßlãkè¤ Juwee yeah, waiting on someone to invite me on their msn before I go to bed.
11/08/2007 8:07:30 PM Juwee ¤ßlãkè¤ ah
11/08/2007 8:07:56 PM Juwee ¤ßlãkè¤ ok well
11/08/2007 8:08:00 PM Juwee ¤ßlãkè¤ catch you later then
11/08/2007 8:08:08 PM ¤ßlãkè¤ Juwee k
11/08/2007 8:08:12 PM ¤ßlãkè¤ Juwee later juwee
11/08/2007 8:09:14 PM Juwee ¤ßlãkè¤ lol k
11/08/2007 8:12:43 PM ¤ßlãkè¤ Juwee well i'm out g'night
11/08/2007 8:13:25 PM Juwee ¤ßlãkè¤ i'd respond but there's kinda no point sooo... lol
and my morning was going beautifully until the ex decided to message me. *sighs*
Sweet confectionery goodness.
A non-VR friend (I have those???) directed me to http://www.pacificnews.org/marko/index.html site, specifically the sex surrogate writing. In which the author, a profoundly disabled man, experiences sexual encounters for the first time.
I found it extremely sad. Not only in the fact that there are still diseases out there that completely ruin a person's body leaving a whole, able, intelligent and slowly despairing mind behind; but also in the fact that this society is so geared towards only finding attractive the physical elite.
I can relate to it in the fact that being a larger sized woman, rejection is everywhere. Obviously not to the extent that this author faced. But still. It hurts. I know how that feels.
The other issue of course is that our technology has advanced to the stage where previously people with these conditions would have died, but now we are keeping them alive. Yet we're shunning the very things that make them human beings.
One of my own personal but little expressed opinions is a belief in a more barbaric tradition of not allowing flawed members of society to procreate. This of course would include me, which I don't mind, I've never much cared for the idea of blatting out spawn. Barbaric societies were physically strong and healthy. Maybe they didn't advance much socially or culturally, but by god they could beat your ass down.
...
And I'll maybe continue this thought process in a little bit, something's just come up.
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