https://youtu.be/-IoOtwyXDeY?si=ed2KDokYk_aRDil2
....😥😓😢
It's night like this that I can tell when my mental health is declining. When I won't sleep.
I can be easily woken, but it's when nothing wakes me and I'm up on my own, when I've only had a couple of hours and don't want to sleep. When the words come to mind while staring outward "If I had someplace to go right now, I would"..
I just realized that one of my suicide plans is actually very close financially 🤔
I would tell therapists along the years that I never attempted suicide because I didn't have the wanted means to. That yes, I did have a plan, but not the funds🤦🏿♂️
See, first I don't want to be found, as well would prefer it be painless. Soooooo, I was thinking getting some drugs, not sure what type, gonna ask around about what can keep you going yet not aware. Then, I need a place to disappear. So, I was considering a swamp, because people can go missing in those all the time, right? So! Ummm, passport for plane, ticket to a place with a large easy access swamp with like gators, ya know for body disposal. And DRUGS! Pills🤔
Ok, so the idea is to acquire the drugs after getting off the plane... OH! And, ummm scuba gear!! Just the tank and goggles though. Head to a swamp, take a bunch of drugs, put on gear, walk into swamp 😌
Lol, reach the bottom before being eaten perhaps and just walk. Drugs kick in and my mind is gone, no pain, as I either drown or do whatever to end up eaten and disappeared 😌
Ooooo, this is.. What month is this. September?
October, November, December 🤔
I COULD GONE BEFORE NEXT YEAR🤯😮
.....🥲😌, I'm a genius🙃
COMMENTS
Honey, suicide is never the answer. It's easy to give up, but it takes a lot of balls to find the will to keep going. Everything in life can teach us lessons. Everything that hurts can make us stronger. Every voice inside us that tells us we're worthless and to give up is nothing but weakness and need to be shut down. Please don't let another light go out in this dark world.
COMMENTS
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