The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

Its been a while since I've been here but basically after dealing with with a lot of things and keep in things hidden it has come to my attention that I'm waiting time with my life and need to stop doing that in my opinion. I keep feelings inside of me when I need to keep things from the world but it feels like Iam doing the samething to myself and having to feel this way. It just comes at the shock that something needs to be done to change this part of myself. Part of me wants to face the new reality but another part of me just wants keep the dream bubble going that everything is going to ok and Ineed too pop that bubble in a hurry as a new reality is about to being in my life and Ineed to get over everything that has happend and start to make palns on how to deal with it or else my mind is going to explored from of the wasted effort it has been so far to get to this point in my life and the fact is that Ihave taken advange of it for too fucking long. That the truth of the whole thing is that you need to get over it in order to move on to the future. It just that what do u do when you are just too damn lazy to even take the time to get shit done. And that's the problem that I currently face in my life. It is a constant struggle to actually get up and do something about it. I just wish Ihad the friends to encourage me to do it and instead of not having anyone else around. It just make me afraid of the world that I'm going to have to deal with itand the fact that Ihave to do alone scares the shit out of me and I need to just deal with it in.order to start to the next process of my life. My only question is that will I ever take my own advice and do it or will I contuine to live in a fantasy world just waiting.for it to have it popped by my own ego only time will tell on that one