I find myself wondering what I'm working towards now a day... I don't mean just in my job but I mean in general.... Seems the harder I work, the more I try, the more I fail..... I mean honestly whats the point?
My only motivation anymore is my Bitty, her tears, the pain I know she is feeling, and the sadness I see in her little eyes..... It makes me want to make her whole world better and make it all right for her...
I can't bare to see her cry... it brakes my heart... I just wish I could make this all better and make her happy again....
I guess some people don't want the same things other people do and some people only think of themselves and choose to blame everyone but themselves for their problems... They cant admit to their short comings and they cant take a step back to stare into the mirror at themselves to see how they are affecting the lives of others... they want to accuse others of being petty, selfish, not able to be trusted, or even a liar.... when at the end of the day, the things they are accusing others of are actually the things they themselves are guilty of. I try to be an understanding person. I try to be a good person, and I try to see the best in others, but it's getting harder for me to do... I find myself wanting so badly to find the things that were once there and find the world I once knew, but everyday it seems harder and harder, and I find myself in territory that makes me fear for my child.... I don't want her to be hurt because others only think of themselves....
My head is just swimming with thought like this right now....
COMMENTS
-
VAMPIREBLONDEE
22:28 Jul 21 2008
Tabby, I know you are a good person and I understand the pain of seeing your child cry. I wish I knew how to help you fix all this.