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3 entries this month
yea yea I know I'm gonna get fussed at ~Update~
21:55 Sep 17 2008
Times Read: 739
I know that with my last results several people are expecting a nice update how I've been back to my doctor & such. Sorry but I honestly can't go see doc right now. In all honestly I think that I am scared of the outcome. me + doctors = bad news ... usually. Since our yearly vacation is coming up in a week I just don't want to deal with any more bad news. I am already preparing myself for the shit that always happens. Never know maybe my cuz Tiff will be a wanting the fight she tried to provoke when she was still too young for me to touch. Perhaps a nice knock-out fight will help snap me back to where I want to be at -sigh- I really need a life I suppose but not easy enjoying yourself when you're grinning & bearing a shitload of pain behind a hearty laugh as if I am enjoying myself *rolls eyes* I hate to pretend as much as I hate to show everything I am going through ... too much pride isn't why, I just don't like feeling vulnerable.
Well a couple months back I think I posted about telling my son finally that he was magically inclined & I am a witch. I only asked for him to not tell anybody, last thing I need. Well he said something about it to my dad (very unwise especially for me who gets the fuss) ... my dad told him that my using of too much magick when I was younger is why my health is so bad now. Guess it was dad's way of unpersuading my son to use magick. I'll gladly say that magick has had a part but that's because I'm a Giver Healer who like a dumbass took away ailments from others to suffer with the pains & minor illnesses 5fold. Oh posh, personally my dad can kiss my ass on the magick subject because he'll never change me nor my freedom to believe in whatever I want to. White magick causes me grief & misery which in some twisted way I enjoy but anywho ... in the dark arts I have no set backs. Before judged by this I just want to say that if you know anything about magick you would know that dark magicks & white magicks do cross each other at some point.
Ok I'm done for now ... putting on my neck brace & laying down, I'm tired not sleepy only tired ... yes I'm in insomnia-ville again @.@
20:34 Sep 04 2008
Times Read: 746
I find it odd that when you are told not to do something or allow something to happen, that it does no matter what. I have literally stopped counting how many head & neck hits I've taken. None are real big but enough to make my neck hurt or major discomfort. My MRI came back good but I have yet been in to see doc about the situation. I swear I love the burs that are hitting my spine, pain so I know that I'm alive I suppose.
I also find it odd at how many of my "friends" pay attention to my journal. Thanks *says sarcastically* I do thank the handful that have & I appreciate the concern over my well being. I just wish that I felt up to talking or at least staying online for hours but I have to save my strength to take care of my son.
Yay finally a hurricane is supposed to hit my state, we are way over due for one. Since theres so many Mother Nature took pity on us. This will be my son's 1st experience with a hurricane. After he found out that this house went through Hugo (class 3 - 4, it was indecisive) he's ok with this weak ass class 1. Well it's getting close to countdown before landfall & I so do not want to miss it. Yes I simply love the hurricane XD So much chaos for nothing here. The volunteer evacuation has already begun *squeals* it's almost here woot. So I guess that ya should be happy that I found something to be a little bit energetic about. I mean tonight you will find me at the garage door eating chips & drinking sodas, etc.
I wubs all my "real" friends -major hugs- ttfn
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COMMENTS
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Kontradiction
22:25 Sep 17 2008
now can't you get some healing energies from say, a reiki healer to give back some of what was given to you, or can't you draw down some healing energy from the Universe?
just a thought.
Catalunah
00:58 Nov 28 2008