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17 entries this month
Grrr05:29 Feb 27 2010
Times Read: 825
"Some assembly required." Why don't they add....."by a person with an advanced degree in engineering" ?
And the picture/diagram enclosed showing how the things fit together looks like a floor plan of Fort Knox or something. Geez!
Now, Voyager01:52 Feb 26 2010
Times Read: 835
The Untold want, by life and land ne'er granted....now, voyager, sail thou forth to seek and find.
---Walt Whitman
A truly lovely poem, from one of the greatest movies ever.
Bats!23:04 Feb 20 2010
Times Read: 853
Four down, six to go. Gotta get hunting.
Oprah's Ebay Auction01:21 Feb 16 2010
Times Read: 893
I see on the news that Oprah is auctioning off a bunch of her old clothes, shoes, and handbags on ebay to benefit her girls' school in South Africa.
Now, I can see clearing your closet and giving the proceeds to charity....but to your OWN school? The one that bears your name...Oprah Winfrey Leadership Academy? Do we really need to help you fund your school?
I don't think so. I think kids need to be educated right here in America. Funding is being cut to schools, teachers are being laid off, and kids need all the help they can get. Right here. Sorry, Miss O, I'm not going to bid on any of your things. Our kids need help here just as much.
Help Wanted!21:59 Feb 14 2010
Times Read: 908
This ad has been running in our local paper for awhile now. You tell me what you think.
"XYZ Bank is in need of an experienced, proactive, service star to join our Deposit Operations team. This position will be responsible for handling account disputes, assisting customers with account information and/or resolving account discrepancies,performing account research, and numerous other duties. Extraordinary client service skills are a must.
This is NOT an entry level position and requires a 2 year degree in accounting or related field, plus a minimum of 2 years experience in banking or the equivalent in education and experience. Bilingual in Spanish a plus. Must be proficient in Excel, comfortable working with Word to include mail merge, detail oriented and enjoy working in a fast paced environment with daily deadlines. Good interpersonal problem solving, telephone and analytical skills are a necessity.
Starting wage: $8.28 per hour plus benefits."
Um....EXCUSE ME??? Someone has slogged their way through two years of college, plus gotten experience enough to please you, you want them to be able to do all of those things, and you are only going to pay them $8.28? Are you KIDDING?
No wonder this ad has been running for ages. No one wants it!
Shit Gifts15:16 Feb 14 2010
Times Read: 921
I was just in the sandbox reading the "worst valentine's day gift ever" thread. Some of that stuff is truly heartbreaking. No wonder a lot of people aren't big on the holiday. Me, it's just another day, and it falls on my day off, so that's fine.
My worst valentine's day gift....I was going out with this guy at the time and he asked me what I wanted. I told him chocolates and/or jewelry, thinking he would at least get one right. He took me to dinner in a nice restaurant and handed me this box which he asked me to open.
Inside were assorted Hershey's Kisses and miniature Reese's peanut butter cups. Yes, kids, he went out and bought little bags of candy and dumped them into a box. But wait, that's not all! He told me to dig around in the box, so I did...and came up with the most godawful pink cubic zirconium ring. The stone was the size of a 50-cent piece and surrounded by clear cz's. I had to wear this thing all through dinner.
He got the ring back after dinner. He had intended to propose with this hunk of glass (seriously!) and was totally amazed that I didn't like it.
I was flipping channels the other day and saw almost the exact same ring being sold on HSN. I shuddered and changed the channel right quick!
A WHAT!00:33 Feb 14 2010
Times Read: 933
Attention ToiletDuc...thought of you when I read this in ESPN magazine (yes I read that)...
"In 2008, a Red Wings fan smuggled in an octopus. After the anthem, he threw the creature on the ice. Suffice it to say, he was tossed, as well."
Can you imagine smuggling an OCTOPUS into a hockey game? ACK!
Knees01:17 Feb 13 2010
Times Read: 949
I don't know if it's a storm front approaching, the pressure changes making my knees hurt, old age or what..but my knees are killing me. By the end of the week I have had it. I come home and go plop, and don't want to get up for anything. Being on my feet all day is hard, and even though I wrap my knees and wear really good shoes, by the end of the week I am done in.
Bubble bath time!
My Day01:42 Feb 12 2010
Times Read: 963
Spent the day at a Management seminar here today. Hey, it got me out of the store and I got a free lunch, so that was good. Had to sit through most of a day of bun-numbing lectures on employees' rights and the law, and at the end we took a little test to see how well we listened and learned.
Here are a few questions we had to answer. See how well YOU do, and in my next entry I'll post the answers.
1. An employee insists that he does not want to be paid overtime for the extra time he spends at his desk learning a new accounting program. He is willing to sign a waiver stating that it is his idea not to get paid. As an alternative, he asks if he can work through lunch. What do you do?
2. It snows on a Thursday, and you close the office at 3 pm to allow employees to get home before the roads are impassable. You decide to pay employees for a full day. Three of your employees normally leave at 4.30, rather than 5 pm. They ask to leave at 2.30, or be paid a half hour of overtime. What do you do?
3. The new seamstress announces that she is pregnant and due in four months. She wants to know whether or not her job will be open when she returns from maternity leave.
4. John tells his co workers that he has received a raise, and it causes morale problems. You need to prevent this kind of fallout in the future. What do you do?
5. Sally tells you that she has three disabilities: depression, diabetes, and kleptomania. She says she will need to report late to work several days a week, has to have three breaks a day to administer insulin and eat some carbohydrates, and probably will steal things off people's desks now and then. What do you do?
6. An exempt (from overtime), salaried employee starts coming in late every day, and leaves early 2 days a week. He says he has a drug addiction under treatment that will require him to keep this schedule for the next 18 weeks. What do you do?
7. An employee wants his perfect attendance bonus, even though he missed three weeks due to FMLA leave (Family and Medical Leave Act.) What do you do?
Tough eh? Makes you think a bit. I got one wrong, dammit...lol.
SnowPlow01:43 Feb 11 2010
Times Read: 993
I got woken up this morning a little after 2 am by a hellatious noise. It sounded like someone in the apartment below me was having an isssue with someone outside...I could hear shouting from down below and someone outside shouting back, and all this scraping and grinding noise.
Soon as I rubbed my eyes and turned on the light, I could see a snowplow next door at the Pregnancy Clinic. (I always wonder what goes on there..are they promoting or preventing pregnancy? I've never seen a pregnant woman go in there. And what are MEN doing there? But I digress.)
My downstairs neighbor was taking issue with the fact that a snowplow was clearing the parking area, which is right under his window...at
2 am, on a night when there really was no need for a snowplow. We barely got two inches. And the plow had been doing his thing out there, so all the scraping and whatnot woke up my downstairs neighbor, who is usually pretty quiet.
The snow plow driver was pissed that someone would actually shout at him for doing his job...but really, do you NEED to plow at such and ungodly hour? The snow had stopped, like, six hours before. Surely you could have cleared the driveway by then...or let it go entirely, which is what MY apartment building did.
I'm wearing earplugs to bed tonight.
Winter Weather00:56 Feb 10 2010
Times Read: 1,017
The weatherman ought to have his pubic hairs pulled out in slow motion. After getting us all excited, telling us we were in for the blizzard of the century, closing schools, urging people to buy supplies in case the storm blew out their power....how much snow did we get?
Two...freaking..inches. Two inches!
We got all wound up for two inches. However, what we got was pretty nasty....coupled with ice, and blowing....I watched an Astro Van do a complete donut ahead of me going home tonight, as they were going wayyyyy too fast to take the corner and slid around to where they were facing me. Hello! You're going the wrong way, dumbass.
I left my car at home and my boss drove me to work. I think it'll be safe to drive in tomorrow. And, wouldn't you know, when the city declares a snow emergency, telling people to stay off the roads so the plows can clear the streets...that's the time people choose to go out, run errands and generally act like there is no storm? The local news says many cititions were issued for reckless driving, driving too fast for conditions, etc...and the usual texting and driving. IN A SNOWSTORM!!! Ya wanna take them out and bang their heads on the hoods of their cars till they understand you DO NOT DO THAT.
I'm home safe and sound. Gonna pop some popcorn and watch a movie. :)
SNOW00:56 Feb 09 2010
Times Read: 1,037
The weatherman just said "a wall of snow is heading this way." Yikes! Looks like what the east coast got over the weekend, we will be getting imminently. It wasn't supposed to start snowing till after midnight, but it started around 5 PM, which is NOT a good sign. When it kicks in before it's supposed to, that usually means there's a lot coming.
I told my boss I'm not even going to try driving in that mess, if he wants me he can come pick me up in his truck. I'm making chili for lunch tomorrow, so if he wants food, he will come get me.
Bleah. I think we are all sick of snow by now, no matter where you live..give us a break already, ok, Mother Nature?
Saints Win!02:50 Feb 08 2010
Times Read: 1,055
....and New Orleans erupts in joy as their team wins their first SuperBowl. Let the party begin!!
Kids05:17 Feb 07 2010
Times Read: 1,069
The cover story on this weeks' People magazine is about Michelle and Jim Bob Duggar, the couple with all the kids. Their 19th child was born premature but is expected to be ok.
The headline reads: How Many Kids Are Too Many?
The couple acknowledge that others may criticize their having so many children. For those who think all those kids are some sort of financial burden that is being shared by the taxpayer, the story points out that the Duggars live debt free in a home they built themselves, and are supported by real estate investments and their TLC series and book. Their medical expenses are all covered by insurance.
I'm sure a lot of people are aghast at having that many kids. The only thing that bothers me is that every time Mrs Duggar is expecting, there is a press release about it. If you want to have that many kids, you go right ahead, but please don't shove it in people's faces.
Reminds me of that old Andrew Dice Clay routine where he ripped up nursery rhymes:
There was an old lady who lived in a shoe.
She had so many kids..her uterus fell out!
Joke22:14 Feb 06 2010
Times Read: 1,081
Did you hear....that YouTube, Twitter and Facebook are going to join together and form a new company..it's called YouTwitFace.
LMAO!
New Profile!01:09 Feb 06 2010
Times Read: 1,100
I think I broke some kind of VR record for having the same profile for the longest time, lol. Aside from putting the crest of my society on, my profile had not changed since the day it was first created. I liked it fine, it was me in a nutshell, but I longed for something newer, something a little more fabulous.
And voila! My fairy godmother, aka LadyKrystalynDarkstar, desgined me a whole new profile...and it is FABULOUS. From the colors to the graphics (we even got my Egyptian fetish in there lol) it is everything I wanted and more. This lady is amazing. I couldn't have dreamed anything better.
This is a public thank you for all the hard work..it is truly appreciated from the bottom of my gothic heart!!
THANKS LKDS!!
AAAAGH03:03 Feb 05 2010
Times Read: 1,103
I've got the song "Particle Man" by They Might Be Giants stuck in my head.
Why do I get these obscure songs in there? I haven't heard that song in ages.
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COMMENTS
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BLOODLIFE
10:17 Feb 27 2010
lol, you should try this new Lego the kids use these days, I'm sure it's planned that way for their future!
Nightgame
13:10 Feb 27 2010
Nope, been to Ft Knox it's a lot simpler even the vault! They're making these things to test how long it takes to make us scream or pull our hair out before calling their help line and sitting on hold for 3 days.
Sinora
13:32 Feb 27 2010
Lmao....don't you know enough to hire someone to put stuff like that together ?