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I had surgery, went fine. Joshua came and left, it was a great weekend and now hes gone again. I had lunch with craig the monday b4 surgery too. And then I find he has a paid membership on singlesnet, I am hoping to set him up with myself. Then I can let him go... So much for proving loyalty to joshua when I just set myself up on dating singlesnet again, which never went well. I toldhim Iwould be loyal now that we had honesty and truth and trust. I need a life. Doc got changed til friday, went to bed late for 2 nights up at 8am then bed earlier up at 10:20 am missing docs today. charles is gone. Jacob and ambry are my own friends. spanish 2 arrived and i started chapt 1 today. I will finish tonight. i am alone in this world. Patience is what I am learning and I need to find ue for my life here. reading lots and finished season 6 of Oz last night. Awesome last episode. exercising daily too and lovingit, feeling the aches and cramps that im achieving something with my body. walking needs to be put up a knotch. thats bout all my news. kids all got ashmanow, bad, but they are growing as well,,,

Joshua arrives late next Friday evening. I am thrilled. Charles is gone, cant be friends with someone crazy who thinks they love you. Ambry and I hangout and bomb, I help Jacob out and smoke with him and his mom. I see Kaitlyns often too. Rumors Dutch is coming and that he's already here. I dont care. As long as he leaves me alone. Him and Lacey can die here together. But God leaves the miserable here so I just avoid em. I dont know if hes here or if hes saying im coming just to say it, losers. I got my life, pretty boring but occupied and out of trouble and chaos. OZ is awesome I am watching the seasons again, season 4, never say the scecond disc of season 4 or the last 2 episodes. Occupies my mind at night. I love it. I wait patiently for Joshua. My love, but he will not be proposing so I must torture and discipline my self longer to stay away from temptation and danger. I broke my no sex 09 vow. Feb.10 with an old knotch. But I have more tests on my front the week after surgery. I am calmand going to take one step at a time to get through my whole health scenirio. At Janies with kids, had apts with Klein and eye doc today new meds new presc. etc...Angel wants comp. Summarized well