The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

I've always loved the Hollywood scenes of passionate kisses in the rain. It always seemed so thrilling and romantic and I've always imagined it for myself.
It's storming now and all I want to do is drive to you:

We'd meet at some deserted location and you would open my car door. As I stand up our eyes would lock and my breathing would slow. You'd reach for my face and I'd smile. We'd lean in and as our lips touch for the first time since we've met it's nothing but perfection. I'd forget it's only lust and this is only a hook-up to get laid, there's no real connection or affair. I'd only forget because in that moment as my hand runs through your wet hair your eyes reflect that you care, something that's only hinted at in our infrequent messages and phone calls.
Our breathing hastens and you move me into your backseat. Hands are flying trying to fight wet clothing off of pale and brown skin. You tug off my tight jeans and shove me against the door and pierce me with stormy grey-blue eyes. You kiss my mouth and then a trail down my body, biting my nipple as you go. My breath hitches and back arches. You place one leg over your shoulder and delve into me, your tongue searching me, tasting me.
Your hands, the softest hands I've ever felt in the world would explore my body.

I can't even go on, the fantasies that take place in my mind are painfully beautiful and thanks to Saturday's failed communication will never happen.
I was ready, I wanted it, I wanted you.... I still do.
Will you message me ever again Silver-Tongue? Or am I to be left bereft with fantasies and would be-s? I am afraid to message you....the sting and the hole I'll feel in my chest if you've blocked me or don't respond...Saturday wasn't my fault.

I'm not afraid, anymore, to admit that I am desperate for you. I want you, I need to feel your touch and trace your tattoo that peeks from underneath the left sleeve of your t-shirt.

COMMENTS

-

---

VampireoftheDark
11:09 Jun 21 2017

This is so beautiful*howls*

---

POST COMMENT

There's a date
No time and no place.
Are we really going to do this?
Am I really going to do this?
Could I really do this? Be unfaithful?
I want so much to not think and let primal instincts take over.
Can I crumble what I stand for? Will this break me and I never recover?
The idea is thrilling but how will I handle the aftermath?
Will I be cast away by you? Will guilt kill me? Will you think ill of me? Would you even be worth it, risking 5 yrs of a relationship?
My Silver-tongued Temptation I think you may end me tonight.

I am confused...so what else is new?
I just can't decide what I want to do.
I want him, him, him and him- neither one of them are worth the stress.
Do I want to be single?
Cheating is prohibited, fun, but prohibited so single should be the answer, right?
Maybe I just want to be greedy and have all four.
I want to chase and be chased after.
Can't someone be devoted to me just as I am to them?
I just want to turn off all thought, reason and let my body take over: message him, call him, tease him, and fuck him.

COMMENTS

-

---

VampireoftheDark
11:10 Jun 21 2017

This is nice

---

POST COMMENT

It's strange to think about, being a statistic.
Being 1 in 5 women to have this experience.
Last night, I dreamed of my attacker he invaded me and he is still in my head.
The dream started as sweet, having an intimate moment with my Silver Tongued gentlemen and then his face changed.
I found myself unable to speak and unable to move, so let me explain:

The night it happened, Sunday the 23rd, I'll never forget what I can remember.
What started as a fun weekend at Myrtle Beach ended in horror for me.
My friend and I met a group of guys at a particular type of club and one of them had a thing for my friend, so what do I do, I tag along for her safety.
What started out as fun drinking games back at their hotel ended in me having too much to drink and blacking out throughout the night for the first time in my life.
This particular gentlemen I barely spent two seconds on. I barely remember his face, only got a name on a quick intro, Joel- I have a boyfriend and he didn't appeal to me in any way.
The last I remember was dancing on the balcony, doing the splits and then leaving to go to the bathroom....I came back and sat in the chair and don't remember anything until I heard shouting.
I don't know why he was shouting and I don't know at who. I don't know if I spoke. There's this sensation of falling and landing on something soft.

I open my eyes and it's pitch black and I feel his mouth and beard on my sex and it hurts, I whimper and fade away. I open my eyes and gasp out as I feel a sharp pain at my anus. I can't move my legs and it hurts so bad, I whimper and fade away.
I finally open my eyes to a bright light, daylight...where am I and who is on top of me? I feel his body pressed on me and I try to push him away, he's scruffy mouth is breathing heavily in my ear, whispering "stay with me, I want you to stay with me"
"No, I whimper, I wanna leave. I need to go home, get off of me."

I don't remember how I got my panties and jeans on. I don't remember setting up a Lyft ride nor getting into an elevator and going down 11 floors and getting in car. I don't remember getting back to villa I was staying at and going back to sleep until it was time to check out.

So where was my friend, you might be asking yourself....I asked that as well. Turns out my friend walked in and out of the room several times and she called me and apparently I called her back. Apparently, she tried getting me to leave but assumed I was okay since I was verbally responsive to what was going on. No one picked me up and rescued me. No one stopped him. No one realized I was too intoxicated to consent. So she left me.
On our trip back home she asked, "Did you at least come?" I cried.

She dropped herself off at home and took myself to an urgent care for a sexual health work up.
I sat for 2hrs before I couldn't bare it anymore and began to cry and told them I just wanted to shower. The told me I would need a Rape kit and they didn't have those there and suggested two hospitals. I chose the second because I work at the first one. So I drove an hour away to the second hospital. I thought I was going to be alone but a volunteer from a crisis center and came sat with me throughout the exam and each time I had to relive what I can remember.

Where was my boyfriend during all of this you might also be asking yourself? At home giving me the silent treatment having no clue what I had just been through. It was mad at me for going to the beach without him, but he had rejected the invitation and the trip had been planned for a month.

So current update:
Other than occasional nightmares, I am beginning to cope that I am a sexual assault victim and survivor. My boyfriend now knows; however he blames me, he looks at me differently and he touches me less than he did before (for those that have read by previous entries you know how get the gist of the sparse sex-life.)
I am clean- Joel did not leave me with HIV, Syphilis, Chlamydia, Gonorrhea, or genital warts/herpes. I am only left with emotional scars and physical scars on my rectum and labia.
I have been in contact with the Detective on my case and I am being multiple sessions a week with my therapist.