The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

Yet another forum entry reposted here
01:04 Sep 29 2007
Times Read: 557

There is actually a series of books entitled. "Ghost stories of..." then enter the country, state/province etc here. *laughs*



Here's a Canadian Ghost story for ya from the Prairies :) :

My Uncle's house is actually in one of these books. My Uncle bought an old farm once lived in by two elderly people, a husband and wife who raised several generations of children under that roof. After the patriarch and matriarch of the family had passed on the family moved on to the city and sold the land and home to my uncle.



My uncle had decided to go out to the farm, stay a few nights alone seeing what needed to be "fixed up" ect, while his wife stayed in the city. I believe it was the first night that he awoke to the image of a woman standing guard over his bed. Before he could get a good look at her, she vanished.



Now my uncle is not a man to believe in ghosts ect and whoa... heaven forbid you wake him up in the middle of the night for it will not end pretty. He chases after where he thought she had gone and in the process nearly falls down the two flight stair. (Which by the way were in need of repair as well.)



Over the next couple days an nights, convinced he just chased someone out of the house, he takes measurements and the like of what needs to be repaired or completely re done. However, as he's doing so, little things we take for granted begin to occur. His keys are never where he distinctly left them. His coffee cup often ends up in an entirely different room, same with some of his tools and a creepy basement with a draft where there should be none ( being several feet underground.)



After the days he said he'd be gone are done he goes back to town and starts hiring contractors to come in to do the work. Several crews, many tools missing, "falls" from ladders and utter refusals to go into the basement, later. The house is almost finished in time for his sister's wedding.



There is still... the basement. Now again, my uncle is a massive skeptic, he is also a very "built" man and could probably kill ya six different ways before ya hit the ground. My Uncle goes down into the basement and begins doing that work himself. Again, things go missing, the stairs are treacherous, things end up in rooms upstairs. Yet in his searching he can find no cause for the draft but instead finds a chest of old pictures ect from the previous family.



The matriarch of the family was the woman he saw over his bed.



He shakes it off of course, I mean, that's just the type of man he is and takes the photos up to his wife. They both agree to put the pictures of the Matriarch and the patriarch (two separate black and white photo's) up on the wall above the first landing of the stairs he nearly fell down the first night. From then on no keys went missing, no coffee cups moved, no tools in different rooms...



Now. Here's where I come in. For you see I was at my aunt's wedding. I've seen these photos before and after the wedding album came out. But I get ahead of myself.



My Aunt's wedding went off without much of a hitch... except the priest nearly had a heartattack but think that's cause it was his first wedding to perform.



Now... I being well... Me in a new house as a kid*laughs* began snooping around. Perhaps it was just my childhood mind playing tricks on me but everywhere I went I felt like I was being watched and much to my amusement, my drink glass distinctly marked by my scribbling began to appear in almost every second new room I went into. To say nothing of the fact that all the "adults" were outside socializing, mind you I could hear one of my aunts in the kitchen moving around.



Anyways. So. Someone of the bridal party suggest taking a picture of the whole procession on the stairway. Now if you remember correctly, those old stone faced pictures of the previous family were above the first landing. After the whole cup fiasco, I latched on to the photographer and followed him like a hawk cause like *clears throat* I was going to hang around my parents due to some stupid house.



I was standing right beside the photographer when he took the picture of the party on the stairs. I saw these pictures of the Matriarch and Patriarch of the former family being stone faced and looking outward at those in the other room.



Now I know people won't believe me because well, that's the nature of skeptics hehe :) *clears throat*! I don't even believe it and I saw it clear as day. As I was standing beside the photographer, him pausing to put film in. I swear I saw the picture of the woman flicker a moment.



When the photo album came out and I looked at the pictures... The picture of the bridal party on the stair froze me. The picture of the Matriarch up on the wall in the photographer's picture, was not looking out into the other room but was turned slightly looking at the group on the stair with a smile to its lips.



I have not been back in that house since.



Now... My Uncle much to his credit had not joked around about all that happened as he was putting the house together until after the wedding...being the type of man he is... he didn't want to unnecessarily frighten anyone who may have been prone to believe such "supersticious nonsense" in his opinion. I didn't learn about what happened to my Uncle until after I held the photo album and went Wholy *clears throat*



*laughs, smiles* Again I know. I won't be believed but *laughs* its become a family joke that they won't let me live down. :)



Toodles all!

Take care and be well

Ara.

Yet another topic on the forums! whee!
23:37 Sep 27 2007
Times Read: 560

*laughs* As I had hinted to in an earlier journal entry dooooooonnnn't get me started talking about Empathy *laughs* :) Welllll... Guess what *laughs* I got access to the forums! And there was that Empathy topic, so I let loose. *laughs* :)



Here's my nonsensical babblings for those who can't find the forum topic and are curious what I wrote:



*clears throat* Weeellll... I wouldn't go so far as to give myself the label of empathic, some have called me that in the past... yadda yadda... I just chalk it up to me being me, people can call it whatever. *laughs* Even purple monkey dishwasher, if they truly chose to :) but I'll share what seems to aid me in calming it all down and not wanting to gouge out my eyes trying to tell what's me and what's Joe shmoe eating a hamburger in the corner! hehe :)







Firstly! Do not tire yourself out.

If you are tired or under alot of stress about things or matters that only affect you and you're getting warn thin. My advice... cut it out and learn to let go of the "little things." *laughs* yes yes I know easier said than done since so many "little things" equal one "big" thing you have to fret and worry over. *le sigh* I guess the point I'm trying to make here is that if you do not keep your outer body from wanting to crash and burn in a ball of flames from stress or what have you, then your inner natural defences will be weakened or practically non existent when you go to call on them. In a state of already emotional stress, caused solely by you, it is common sense to assume that due to already being sensitive naturally, then also sensitive empathically that emotions of others will catch you off guard quicker and will be harder to overcome when they attempt to overwhelm your already warn thin senses.



( hehe I should be careful about the words common sense *laughs* What's common sense for one, is not for another hehe :D *runs*)





Secondly. Do Not Panic.

Oh goodness I cannot stress this enough. Do not get locked in the "WTF" moment by freaking out when you get overwhelmed or caught off guard. (Lets face it. Even if you're this massive guru, there's always going to be moments you will be caught off guard or overwhelmed, may as well get use to it. *laughs* :) ))

Trust that even without training in shielding and what not that it is naturally within you to regain control of your own inner self if you get caught off guard or overwhelmed. Shielding and learning how to block or repel input is simply the conscious effort of an already natural subconscious phenomenon of your inner self. If you believe you are able to control and are in control even in circumstances where it is not readily apparent, you will revert back to a calmer state, or a state that is solely your own much quicker than if you let it over run you by believe you have no recourse but be a victim of the light at the end of the tunnel being a train.



"It is within the powers of your mind to affect change within that mind."- Friend of mine once said. :) Woot! Mind over matter! er... In this case Mind over mind. hehe :)







Thirdly: You are not a freak, abnormal, or should be locked up!

( Don't make me get out the rubber mallet and start playing whack-an-empy. :) )

Whether your awareness of the world around you comes from simply being observant, intuitive and able to correspond actions to emotions or you are indeed more sensitive beyond that, even with complete and utter strangers; your awareness no matter how it is derived is natural. You are not a freak of nature; your extra sensitivity if you have it is simply a slightly higher step of another natural occurrence, that of being overtly observant to naturally occurring social cues.

I have found that believing oneself to be a “freak” or “abnormal” in the negative (for I know people who delight in those titles being given to them *laughs* :) ) connotations of the words interrupts the inner self’s ability to cope with the sensations it is taking in and the individuals ability to interpret/understand; thusly believing that Empathy is simply another natural phenomenon or at the very least is a natural occurrence to those with the ability, is in fact beneficial to progressing with the ability and/or gaining more control of the sensory input.







Fourthly: Deal with you, before another for gaining control of yourself, you will aid them more.

I know that sounds perhaps cruel to say, but if you are indeed sensitive, then you will give out just as much if not more so than you take in and if you are tripping out on a friend’s turmoil of emotions, you will be aiding more to their turmoil than helping them “get over it.” Vicious cycle. They affect you, you affect them and because you affect them they are even more in a state of emotional upheaval and you get a headache. *Shakes head* Vicious cycle *laughs* to put it bluntly. :)

In this sort of situation take a moment, take a deep breath and try and differentiate between what are distinctly your emotional reactions and what are theirs. Once you realize that your emotional state may and will affect them, attempt to focus keeping your emotions in check before attempting to sort through the sensations you are gaining from them.

If their emotional state is simply too much for you to handle and you get a sensory overload, attempt to get them to calm down at least outwardly to lessen some of the “blaring.”



One technique that has helped and I do, do this and ask others to if I know it is from them that the “overload” is coming from. It is simply a breathing exercise requiring little than somewhere to sit and a few moments of time.



Step 1: Sit down.



Step 2: Put your hands in front of you on your lap, your feet fully on the floor.



Step 3: Interlock the fingers of your hands together, thumbs side by side. (For myself if I feel especially overwhelmed, I also cross my arms over my chest before interlocking my fingers.)



Step 4: Cross your feet at the heels while attempting to keep the soles of your feet on the ground.



Step 5 (optional): Close your eyes.



Step 6: Focus on the sound of your breathing, the feel of your heart in your chest. The ground below your feet, the feel and smell of the air. The sound of sounds (and sights of the sights, if your eyes are still open,) of all that is around you.



Step 7: Breathe in past what you believe your lungs can carry



Step 8: Hold that extended breath for at least to the count of six



Step 9: Slowly release that breath and attempt to breathe out past what you believe your lungs had of air.



Step 10: Repeat steps 7-9 as needed to rein in oneself and sort through the sensations.



I find this aids in re-centering my inner self so I can better handle whatever just jumped past my guards and shields :) and “calms” the other person down enough for things to not be “blaring” while attempting to help them.









Fifthly: What you are experiencing may not be them, but you. (Ties into number 4 and 1)

Your emotional state will directly impact how you are able to interpret the sensations coming at you, your ability to act on them and your ability if necessary to block them. If you do not pay attention to your own emotional/mental well being and keep it nice and healthy like the little puppy you just brought home it will come around later on as a big ugly mutt to bite you in the tushy. You cannot attempt to conquer your Empathy if you are attempting to battle such things as depression etc. *shakes head* yes yes I understand probably far more than ya’ll would think I could know that attempting to conquer your Empathy may be one of the reasons your depressed etc… but Do please note my use of the words ONE OF. *sigh* Just cause you’re Empathic does not mean that you can be escapist and believe everything that you are going through/experiencing etc is simply the by product of being sensitive. None of this, the world is *clears throat* so that’s why I feel like *clears throat.**clears throat again* Can we say cop out?

By believing that everything you are experiencing is entirely external, externally motivated due to something internal, instead of realizing it is a mixture of both with some of it being entirely under your control, I can say this with a degree of certainty true balance will not be achieved and you will be constantly battling yourself.

Know thyself fully, take time to know who you are, and come to an understanding or at least a compromise with the three aspects of “me myself and I” so that they don’t kill each other or end up driving the fourth aspect, (the one looking upon the three and shaking their head or nodding,) crazy trying to sort everything out.







Sixthly: Acceptance.

The words “deal with it” are to easily said and to easily thrown about. It will take time to get use to and accustomed to, but and I will say this, never have I come across someone truly accepting of this natural ability because of the chaotic nature of emotions and the sensations being ever changing. There will always be a time, or times where one will be overwhelmed no matter how many shields, guards or years with Empathic abilities; if one cannot accept the reality of their sensitivity then they should at the vary least accept the universal failings of it.

I also believe that until it is more accepted to be sensitive (Empathic) and this sensitivity is more and more common in society, will one have a true sense of ease and acceptance with and of their Empathy.

I would argue probably despite what I have said earlier, that true mastering of one’s inner self in regards to Empathy hinges on the level of acceptance/denial of one’s sensitivity.



Ok. I think I’ve babbled enough on my point of view on it all. *laughs* Please do remember this is only my opinion and *laughs, smiling* I do realize I can be completely out to lunch, but! While I’m out, anyone want a sandwich? :D hehe



Toodles!

Take care and be well hehe :D

Ara. :)





hehe well that's it folks *laughs* as before take it with a grain of salt or gold, your choice.hehe :)

Toodles!

Take care and be well :)

Ara.

I get access to the forums only for the topic to die! *grumble*
16:01 Sep 27 2007
Times Read: 562

grrr. *laughs* Grr.



*Warning… Warning, Danger will Robinson Danger, -waves arms- There is a rant approaching!* Ye hath been warned! Disclaimer: I am not worth the time to get angry over or waste time “*clears throat* me out” in a message. My views are simply my own opinions on any given subject, don’t like what I say when I exercise my right of free expression, then exercise your free will and stop reading to move on to something more interesting and less stressful for you. It’ll make both of us a lot happier in the long run. :D Graci







well… Now that that’s done, let me continue :D.







Ever since I’ve come to this site I’ve been finding topics on the forum that only the fact that I cannot post yet has saved ya all from listening to my nonsensical babblings. *Laughs, smiles* Buuuuuutttt Then again, there is always the journal in which to rant *grins* Dun dun Dunnnnn



Yay! As I was typing I hit forum access level, buttt! Since my luck is exactly zilch... The topic is dead. Bah!







Yesterday morning I came upon this little ditty of a topic. “What are people’s thoughts on forced awakenings” and truly, my first gut reaction was to blink a few times and then growl deeply. *blink* Talk about a controversial subject! Not to mention depending on how you take it… a much heated one! I mean… Daaayyyum.





For me to tackle these "thoughts on forced awakenings" I first have to babble and fuddle out what to me, describes an "awakening."



Personally and I will say this straight up front, I believe no one is truly awakened. We are in a constant state of changing, of adapting, of awareness of mind, body, soul. It is an ongoing process of understanding that never ceases moving unless, we in our arrogance believe we know all there is to ever know. There have been countless times when “one swoop of a word shatters the silence of our perception” to quote one of my poems, where one word, a phrase and the like shifts research into our inner coils in a new direction or puts a new spin upon things we have already preconceived to be immutable. In my opinion awakening is a journey, a constant state of being that is continually evolving and expanding our understandings of the worlds inside, outside and around us; therefore, being awakened is simply the present state that we, for the moment have stopped our journey. This stopping is a conscious/subconscious choice and in no way means that by currently being stopped in the journey and being given the label “awakened” that it means we know all there is to know. If one were to know all there was to know, even knowledge which has yet to be known, we would have attained “Perfection of the mind” and to remember a phrase I have taken to heart... “To claim perfection is in itself a flaw”...Therefore, we would be "out to lunch" if we believed any one singular person held all the answers to life, the universe and everything.... which by the way according to the Hitchhiker's guide to the Galaxy, I believe they stated that it is 42. :P



Next step in tackling these "thoughts" are taking a look the sides of the coin and come up with my own. Perhaps ironically, in discussing the other two I have come further in my own thoughts on the matter.



Firstly: On one hand you have people who do not believe that awakenings (the first comings of realizing one’s inner self/nature or developing further that process of understanding) can be forced. That awakenings are simply a natural process that one is born to follow and will come with due time in it’s own time. It is a journey only to be undertaken by thineself for the well being and balance of ones inner state. That no amount of “forcing”, ”manipulation”, or “guidance” will detract or truly affect the progression or submission of one’s awareness of oneself. It is all on an individually guided journey that one’s individual inner self takes them on and is only limited by the limits one places on themselves.

A.K.A… “All on you babe. All on you to decide what to believe, what not to. What to attempt to enhance and suppress. What falls you take and how high you rise in understanding of yourself. No one knows you but you, all others know is a perception of you. It is you who decide which perception you’re going to believe." In this way one can find mentors, elders etc who can aid by telling what they have done but the onus is still on the individual whether or not they believe, progress that direction etc etc...



Secondly: On the other hand there are people who believe that indeed an "awakening" can be forced through the imposing of one's own psionic/psychic nature upon an individual with latent traits they were born with in an attempt to make the individual face their inner nature, adapt to it and begin looking at the world in a different way. Some families ( real families.. mommy daddy yadda yadda) with the shared traits of inner being, will sometimes use this as a "right of passage" however, I must state, only because there is a solid foundation of support afterwards for the beacon does this occur. I have seen manuals to this effect which call for intense imposing of psionic/psychic energies and deeply taking of those energies from the individual. I have seen the effects of attempting to do such to an individual. The affects very on a wide spectrum depending on how to the surface the individuals nature had already been and the support structure in place to aid the individual deal with the natural changes according to their nature, to their awareness. Ranging anywhere from paranoia, terror, mental derangements and possible risk of suicide to gentle accepting, awe, determination to progress and possible wish to aid others. It is the belief that if you attempt to "awaken" someone in this manner, you are without saying so, agreeing to aid them if and when they need it without hesitation during their journey until they believe they no longer need their support system.





My opinion: Whether or not someone can be forced is debatable, (as seen above)but someone can attack another and that having the method of "forced awakenening" being described as an attack upon a possible future brother or sister, does not stop some individuals from attempting to catalyst the natural progression of a beacon to a level that cannot deny.

I would argue that you cannot force someone who's journey has not already begun in some mode or fashion and that attempts to force that journey do more lasting harm than allowing "nature" to take its course. This harm in my opinion is double folded in the cases where Beacons are forced and promptly abandoned. There is no support structure, no one to go to who they feel would be able to relate. Some individuals will go to great lenghts to suppress themselves, making themselves sick with the attempts to make themselves feel "normal."

I also believe that those who employ the "forcing" are making a conscious choice to attack a future brother or sister who cannot defend themselves from the attack. I believe that they who attempt to throw fuel to the fire already starting to burn in a Beacon are attempting to do so with good intentions but that the saying is true... "the road to hell is paved with good intentions"... and it truly does end up doing more harm than any "good" to the individual for it forces their inner nature to swim before it knows how to float. I also believe that those who employ these systematically timed attacks and manuals of how to go about it, examine the concequences of their actions before doing so and accept their part in being the support system for that Beacon.



Side note: VR needs a longer span of time before it auto logs you. *grumble*



*sees the pitchforks and smells the rotten veggies*

Anyways.... I've said my peace and babbled long enough. Take what I've said as your free will dictates ... as a grain of salt or gold *shrugs* your choice, but for me... I'm hungry.



Toodles!

Take care and be well hehe :D

Ara.

Mondays... ew
14:54 Sep 24 2007
Times Read: 568

Mondays need to roll over, dig itself a very deep and very putrid grave, then stay there never to be thought of or spoke of again!



Dot Dot Dot



Ok.. that was gloomy, let me start over. *clears throat*



Monday's need to be called something else so that we can pretend that monday's never existed in our "I don't want to acknowledge you, so you don't exist" world. I mean, take a look at the number 13 and how even though there's only thirteen floors to a building somehow or other... Let there be! A fourteenth floor!. Personally I love the number 13, I don't know why. *shrugs* Maybe it has something to do with if you turn the number one on its side and slide it between the middle of number three, you get two images that make one chuckle in the morning. Depending on the angle of course hehe. :)



Yes yes I know I need more sleep.:P Dayum monday mornings being my wake up early day. *growl, grumble* Grumble!



*blink.... blink blink* I just realized I went completely polar.... from death to sex. *blink* *laughs* Poe much Ara. Yeesh *slaps self a few times*



On better news!! Yay! A friend of one of my big bro's is going to help me with coding on my profile. Wheee! *little dance, trips over footstool* hehe :) we'll see.



Ack! *looks at clock* I'm late for my bus!...

Toodles all

Hope your monday goes better than mine will :/

hehe

Take care and be well :)

Ara.

Ah the joys of being a brand new noob noob whelp
19:11 Sep 23 2007
Times Read: 573

I get to play with Quizilla!



Ok.. Perhaps I should back up a bit. *hits rewind* tib a pu kcab dlouhs I spahreP



!alliziuQ htiw yalp ot teg I *presses play* Much better :)



Ok. *cracks knuckles* Thus far VR has been a very interesting site, must say there's much here that has kept my devil idle hands busy.....*reads forums...* Like for instance threads about empathy. Oh goodness do not get me started on empathy. *shakes head* Stopping me once I've started to talk about empathy is like attempting to stop the train at the end of the tunnel before you can read its bumper sticker on your forehead. Lovely Image no?... hehe.. lucky for ya all I feel merciful today and only type a few words to calm my busy devil idle hands....*tries to respond* Er... I saaaaaiiiiid ... *tries again* ah stick it... actually more aptly an expression would be Impale it but considering the site... that would be in bad taste.



So thusly thwarted *shakes fist* I bumble onto the articles to see if there's anything there that would occupy my mind since my hands are currently tied on the forums. (dayumit! *laugh*) note: - For those of you who do not know what bumbling looks like, picture a very large man huming to himself and sort of swaying to the next page going "dum dee dum dum" and you'll sort of get an Idea of what it means to bumble. Failing that, think of bee's until they stings ya in the tushy.



ANnnnnyways. So.. Articles... Some very nice stuff buuuuuutttt... *Cackles Maniacly* One should have never given me a "guide to Html" hehe Whee! :) I will have to go coastal on my profile page later. Post some pictures and the like. Like this one!







Woot :)



Then.. after fuddling with that for awhile, I found QUIZZIES! The quirky little fun type quizzes that everyone really doesn't care about but is curious and seems like a good idea to take it at the time. *snorts* "seems like a good idea at the time" Famous last words of the cat trying to read the bumper sticker in the last off the wall association. :)



Just for a lark, considering it was singing "We are the champions" when the cat got ran over by the train... I did the What Masquerade clan would you be in? Quiz. Annnnnnd for those who might be curious too what my result was. Tada! Let there be resultage...

*crosses fingers* I hope that coding holds :/ else I'll have to kick my computer again. hehe :) *shrugs* what can I say, I've got a quirky sense of humour... almost surprised I didn't get Malkavian. *laughs* :) I do like the Giovanni motto though: "Tread lightly, for after all you're just as valuable to a Giovanni dead as you are undead." hehe Morbidly quirkly with the right twist of peverse humour... now imagine that statement going something like. "Tread lightly, for after all you're just as valuable to a Giovanni undead as you are being a zombie wearing a neon pink tutu dancing to Micheal Jackson's Thriller.."



Yes, yes I know. Ya'lls minds went for a moment "Dot, Dot, Dot" but hehe I have to ask the question after you stop laughing :). Which is scarier I wonder the threat of true death, or the threat of being humiliated after you've got ya tushy kicked and your soul sucked out?*smiles innocently* I'm sure I could find a nice purple one if ya wish. hehe



*Looks at time* Ack.. lunch time.

Toodles all!

Take care and be well!

-Ara.



P.s. That spider under your pillow last night's name is Wilber, try not to swollow him as you snore he's poisonous. :) *skips off merrily*