The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

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#The Inquisitive Pup: Issue 395#

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Articles written by K-9s for K-9s





Part 1. NEWS

Part2. Photos of streak.

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Warning!: The following editorials may offend devoted lovers of Mitt Romney and Cats. Thank you.

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Story I: Scooter Dropped A Hat.

written by Semour Fleas.



This past Monday, when the greyish grass was grown, Scooter, a Pomeranian had swiped his pet's adorably scrumptious bowler and scurried to his favorite digging spot to bury it when he almost nearly collided with an exposed manhole, luckily he got distracted by an ice cream truck at the last second and took off. The bowler however wasn't as lucky.



When the pet couldn't find his favorite hat, a cat nearby named mittens was inevitably blamed.



In his defense, mittens claimed that he was "nyu nyu nyu, nyu nyu." Whatever that means.



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Story2: Petsmart Opens In Neighborhood. Tinkles Hides Under Bed.

Written by Alexander Bow-Wow.



Petsmart is scheduled to open a store in Luxoria, ********. Where Tinkles, a Chihuahua currently lives. When he heard the news, Tinkles ran into his pet's sleeping area and hid underneath his bed. For years, Tinkles had been locked in a cage, being fed expired dog treats and taunted incessantly by annoying human pups. Tinkles fears that he will be taken back to Petsmart and worries about other dogs living in similar conditions.



"I'm not coming out ever. I'll stay here until either that place leaves or my pets get me the fudge out of here." Said Tinkles when I snuck in through the window to get an interview.



The pets have been fervently trying to coax tinkles out with toys and yummy treats, but to no avail.



In another sleepy burg, another dog lies terrified of Petsmart. How many more dogs will suffer before that place is stopped.



This has been Alexander Bow-Wow reporting.



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Story 3: Bravery Takes A Crap On Mitt Romney's Shoes.

Written by Antonius Bone-Hugger.



Dogs have been a major target of Mitt Romney since his anti-dog campaign was announced. His vow to cage every dog and strap them to minivans to be driven in circles until the dogs reveal where they hid their weapons of mass destruction, has angered the k-9 community whose collective answer: "What's A Weapon Of Mass Destruction", has gone unheard.



After Romney's public kicking of a dog in the butt was televised. A Labrador named Bravery, publicly came out to state his opposition to Romney, starting DOOR (Dogs Outraged Odorously By Romney. Last Tuesday, Bravery made shocking headlines when he ruined Mitt Romney's pants in front of a live audience. The entire world cheered, but non cheered louder then the k-9 community.



Bravery has stated that he will do it again. "As Mitt Romney has pants or shoes, I will be around to ruin them." Since then, many other dogs have vowed to ruin Mitt Romney's pants and shoes.

I sincerely hope his threads are dry-clean only because he'll need a frequent dryer's card.



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Part 2: Pictures of Steaks has been omitted.