Somedays more than others I struggle with who I am. I do not like me some days and others I tend to enjoy who I am.
I often wonder what damage I have done to myself when I closed myself off from parts of me. I am slowly healing now that I have started to open back up, but what have I missed...
Would I be someone completely different? Would my outlook on life be the same...or would I have a different approach to everything?
I ask myself these questions more and more...I know I shouldn't dwell on them but its harder some days than others to remind myself that I am working on healing...with the help of a few friends.
I shut people out...not intentionally but when I am feeling off...I want to be by myself don't want to be bothered. There is one person I can be around when I get like this and I thank her for the energy she tends to send my way...she usually knows what I need more than I do myself.
Sorry I'm rambling now...but anyway enjoy reading my journal as I explore and enjoy my awakening
I have always been interested in the paranormal... my mom was one who never told us it wasn't possible. She was the one I went to if I saw or heard something...
I have seen and heard things I wish I never had to...and seen things that I am still in awe of. I shut down the part of me that was open to a lot a few years ago and am hoping that being around it again will help me to awaken what I was.
I am 24 years old with 4 older sisters and a younger brother. I have 10 nieces and nephews the oldest being 16 years old...the youngest a little over 3 months. I have lived in the same state pretty much my whole life...except for 4 and a half years my dad moved us up to Anchorage, Alaska to live.
No I did not live in an igloo...
(would have been cool though)
But anyway...I started here on VR because of a close friend...Zilaheteb, she is the one who recognized what I had hidden so deep away and is helping me find how to control myself better so that I can live the life I was meant to.
COMMENTS
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ValkreanDragoon
07:17 Sep 29 2008
I have been there many times myself.... those questions can become very destructive.... If you ever need to talk, please remember I am here for you... anytime....
Zilaheteb
10:02 Oct 03 2008
Anytime, most days I have it to spare ; )
I love you