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Please Read This Disclaimer.
This is a satirical article of a mirthful nature to introduce young vamplings to the sport of the vampire masters. In other words, it's a bit of fun - enjoy in this spirit. Oh, and become a snooker fan! :-)

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Introducing: The Sport Of The Vampires

	In the Moonlight Saga, Vampires are seen to be playing Vampire Baseball. This is of course pure fantasy; the real sport real vampires play is ... Snooker. This first came to the attention of the public when Vampire Master and former Snooker World Champion Ray Reardon received his honours for his services to the sport, and a striking likeness to Count Dracula was commonly observed. Below is a typical Snooker hall, many of which exist quietly and mostly unnoticed on High Streets across the United Kingdom, but also in other places as the covens are expanding. Please note the decor, reminiscent of a mix between Egyptian temples which some of the older snooker vampires have brought to the game; and Art Deco influences amongst the younger ones. As you can see, no natural daylight can enter here; windows are boarded over, blackened out and heavily curtained to boot. Snooker halls are also open to players 24 hours a day, leaving the daylight hours mostly to innocent and unknowing folk and the living cleaning staff.
	Whether they appear young or old, the vampires amongst the professional snooker players are easily recognised by their intensely pale complexion and of course, the classic vampire stare which speaks of infinity .
Intensely allergic to sunlight, the players wear protection even after dusk has already fallen.

Lady vampires also take part in the sport. This one here is a referee as well as a coven mistress.

Here we see a Chinese master with two of his fledgelings playing the sport.

Beautiful women who want to live forever are drawn to the masters who often use snooker events to talent spot and recruit new blood for their covens.

The main tournament takes place in the aptly named "Crucible Theatre" in Sheffield UK.

Perfectly protected from natural daylight and being played after darkenss falls into the early hours of the morning, many vampire fans of the sport use these occasions to congregate, socialise, and cheer on their respective coven masters.

Sadly and pathetically, some prospectives are driven to desperate measures to gain the attention of the masters.

Needless to say, this one was immediately removed in complete disgust and has never been seen again since.

If you look closely at this image, taken in 1835, you will see some of the players above - perfect proof that snooker is indeed, the choice sport of vampires.

Now we may ask ourselves - what is it about snooker, apart from the absence of daylight, that keeps vampires fascinated and playing for centuries?

Firstly, it is a matter of time. Snooker affords the lengthiest matches available in sports today.

Vampires like the mental battle with their opponents and of course the skills required are legendary.

The enormous size of the tables represents a fine challenge for vampires who have much better eyesight and accuracy compared to the mere mortals who play pool on tiny tables in comparison.

The well behaved audience and the wearing of dress suits also appeals to many of the older ones.

Many cite that the game itself, which is to restore order to chaos by skill and will power, is what attracts them most.

If you are unfamiliar with the sport of vampires or were brought across in an uncivilised place, please watch the video below, featuring a rare 147 clearance by Master O'Sullivan of London. I am sure you will see the point and go on to support our great game of snooker - the game of vampires world wide.