WILDCHILD | Vampire Rave

WILDCHILD

by PAGAN

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Page last updated: Jul 09 2011
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Everyone admires a person who speaks their mind and stands up for what they believe in. Now, add a great sense of humour and cool into the mix and you got one hell of a great guy.

I know a real Wildchild who fits all these categories. I simply had to interview him to find out what makes him tick, what he gets worked up about, and what he does for fun...

I walked up to his door and rang the bell...I could hear noises that didn't seem human, oh crap, what was I getting myself into now? I heard a "come in, let yourself in" and opened the door to a fury of claws, teeth and fur.

WTF? Damn, it was cats, kittens, and chaos...do any humans actually live here, or had I gone to a cathouse by accident...? It was then that I noticed the guy right in the middle of all these cats...

I giggled...two of the cutest kittens I had ever seen were attached to his feet by their teeth and boy, was he yowling in pain! Do you need a hand (I asked, trying not to laugh). He scowled at me and said, "I need new TOES dammit!". Needless to say, I laughed long and hard. Here was a great big guy, brought to his knees by two tiny terrors, was he really that wild after all? One of my first questions just had to be, who is Wildchild?

"Who am I you ask. I'm just another person trying to make it on the rock we all live on. I'm like most, I'm a father, a lover, a friend and son. I'm a very no nonsence kinda of guy. For the most part I am a very black and white guy with very little grey area".

I nodded at that. Ok, I got it. He was a bit wild after all, hence the name, but just the same as any other good guy. My next question was, so tell me all about this mushroom stamp, what's that all about?

He roared with laughter then:

" Hahahaha, mushroom stamp you say... well you did ask, it is the welt that is left behind after smacking some one with an erect penis generally on the fore head, if done proper the result will look like a mushroom".

Ahem...I blushed a little at that then giggled, (I had asked, maybe I would be a little less curious in future...), so that's what it meant...and my next question followed on from that. Why do you roll the dice to determine your return rate, why not just ignore folk you don't want to rate?

I think he got a bit annoyed with me then because he said:

" Why do I roll the dice? Its really quite simple really, I wanted to see who actually read my profile. Besides it reduces the "why did you rate me this". In all actuallity you chose your own rate. All you have to do is read my journal my return rate is posted when I log on everyday".

"Oh, ok" I replied, it really was all black or white with him. Very clear cut (I thought) I decided to get onto safer territory with him. Tell me what do you do for fun?

"For fun? I love to travel. Dirt track races seem to keep me entertained. The outdoors, anything outdoors. Hunting, fishing, hiking, camping or anything of the like. I will have to say I think cooking is my favorite hobby. I love to cook, it doesn't matter I do it all bake, broil, bbq or fried. If it can be eaten I can cook it".

Now, that made me laugh I could just see him racing about on a dirtbike, mud flying and that wicked grin..., but I had read some of his recipes and dang, they were GOOD. I had heard tales about naked furniture arranging, and stereo-bashing, surely he wasn't that bad? I laughed to myself, he probably was! Just then, an old cat appeared, it was not a wildcat like the others were, but it did appear to be stalking Wildchild...would it pounce? I hoped not, that cat looked mean, I didn't fancy my chances with it at all...

Tell me, why do you have such fierce cats?

" Aww the pussy factor. Well first, you don't choose a cat it chooses you. We like active ones I guess. Luck of the draw maybe, its not like we train them to be ornery and if I find out PD has been, well.........."

Now, that was the best answer, I nodded and grinned right back. He had a wicked sense of humour. I knew my interview would be over shortly so I asked my last question. If I granted you one wish, what would that be?

"A wish really, and I don't have to rub a fat naked man for it? An end to abuse, any and all. From animal to spousal all of it. I would love nothing more then to be put in a room with either a child or animal abuser, wouldn't be long say 20 to 30 minutes. That would be my wish".

Dagnamit, that was a great answer! Just then, the kittens reappeared and Wildchild looked around for a way to escape...I tried to hide behind him because these damn kittens were obsessed with torture and damage, but he pushed me away and told me to run for my life. I didn't need a second telling! I was off! The last I heard was hissing and meowling so terrible I knew he'd been got. Pity, I hoped he would survive, the world would be a boring place without him...

**UPDATE: Wildchild had not been seen for ages and ages... By all accounts he had a great job, doing something that he loved. I wasn't so sure though...these cats had probably eaten him up they were just that fierce...