The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

Having that thought that maybe that feeling is coming back. I don\'t want it to! I like it how it is now! there is no acting there is just us. I see the light coming and I know I don\'t want it to end. I just need to talk to him before I have to push him away. I don\'t want to push him away. He holds me down when I need to be. I finishes me like no one else can. He holds me tight and strong when I feel like there is no one out there for me. But I don\'t know if he feels the same way for me? I don\'t know if he is just covering up those feelings that he once had for me. They seem to be inching up again. The way that he kisses me is all different from before. They seem to be more tender and longing for something more. Something more that he can\'t let it happen. Not again. Not hurting me again. The things he does when I am around makes me smile like there is no tomorrow or laugh till I have tears in my eyes. The way that he runs his hands through my hair when we are falling asleep, then he pulls me in closer with a sigh. He wraps his legs and arms around me tight. I have a feeling he never wants to let me go. I know that he is scared he is going to get hurt or her hurt me. We have both been hurt, he hurt me while his ex hurts him. We both have crazy minds that think opposite but think that same. We have our ways of enjoying pain. I like it when people give me pain while he like to give himself pain, burning himself with a cig. I have always thought that was awful until he pointed out a few things and then i revealed what I have been taught. He thought that was awful that I let people do that to me, but that is the way that I was taught, they way that i look forward to, the way that gets me excited down there. I have left those teaching dormant for 5 years, not knowing if I should let me fly free again. After I told him we just made chit chat and then laid down and watched tv. He turns over and looks at me, I turn and smile back saying \"what!\" He smiles back and starts tickling me.. to be finished later!