The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

Dear Son:

I'm writing this as slow as I can because I know you don't read too fast.

We don't live where we did when you left. Your Father read in the paper that most car accidents happen within 10 Miles of your house, so we moved. I can't send you the address because the last family that lived here took the numbers with them so they wouldn't have to change their address.

This place has a washing machine but the first day I put in 4 shirts and pulled the chain and I haven't seen them since. It only rained twice last week, three days the first time and four the second time.

About that winter coat you wanted me to send you. Aunt Peg said it would be too heavy to send in the mail with all them heavy buttons so I cut them off. You'll find them in the pockets. Your sister had a baby this morning but I don't know if it is a boy or a girl so I don't know if you're an aunt or an uncle.

Your Uncle George fell into a whiskey vat at work and drowned. Some men tried to save him but he fought them off. We cremated him and he burned for three days.

Aunt Peg is knitting you socks. She would have sent them by now but I'd told her that you'd grown another foot since she saw you last, so she's knitting you another one.

I would have sent you some money but I have already sealed the envelope.

Write soon

Love Mom