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However, I am on here, writing in my journal, and talking to my sick 9 year old. HE's wonderful, talented, handsome, kind, I could natter on and on, but it's true. I love im.

Friday was my last day at work. The devility of a temp job. When it goes permanent, it's always a bigget dog what gets the bone.

I haven't gotten to see or talk to Daniel in the past few weeks, due to school, his schedule, and my life. I miss him. He's truly a wonderful person.

God that sounded like I was sucking up.

Ok, real deal here, I like him. I wouldn't kick him out of bed for eating crackers. But by the gods just seeing him and joking around and talking with him makes my day.

I wonder if he realizes that?

Ok, back to my list

I have really got to study, get my school stuff together, do laundry, etc, but by the gods it's WWE pay per view and I'm not missing it.

Time to go make bananna pudding. I love bannana pudding. I'm evil with bananna pudding.

And Dan, if you read this, soon, call me. I miss you.

I had to hurt someone today. I didn't do it directly, but I did it pretty evilly. I was tired.

Let me give you the story dear reader.

My husband and I have an arranged open marriage. He has his playmate, and I have mine.

HAD.

Hubbies playmate and I are grand friends. My playmate is a friend of my husbands playmate.

Confused yet?

Well my playmate decided to act like a jerk. Everything was about sex. All sex all the time.

One night, I went to pick him up for Reiki, and he was getting dressed with the door open to his room. He came out jerked my hand to his crotch and asked me if I could feel how hard and wet I made him.

GROSS!

He tried groping me like I was a paid hooker, and couldn't kiss for anything. He has a very, very, tiny *thing* and tells everyone he's gigantic and that magnum condoms don't fit.

He then proceeds to brag to hubbies playmate that he's getting it from 4-5 different girls, and that he has told me that "there isn't a ring on my hand, you have no say so." That's a bald face lie.

He's not into talking, if you get my drift.

So, I blogged on myspace.

And I posted it as a bulletin.

I didn't mention names, but this might get his attention.

I did it this way, because I hate confrontation.

I am now in the market for a new playmate.

Applications will be accepted until I find one that hubby and I both approve of.

Was I wrong to do it that way? or should I have just let him have it with both barrells, knowing he'd take it out on my friend and husbands playmate?

I just asked if I could help. Fucker. I get this *cocksucker, do it your damn self* and a bunch of whiny bitch attitude.

WHAT THE FUCK DID I DO????

I wish I could talk to Mr. Orange Juice.

Wait, let me finish my cigarette. Honestly.



This week has been the week from hell. I have a project at work that will NOT go AWAY. I'm plugging away at it and it just won't DIE. Ugh.

To make matters worse, the company is downsizing and guess what? Due to senority, I got my 3 weeks notice from my boss. He is UNHAPPY. So am I. I mean I'm supposed to be indispensable. I guess his bosses think I am dispensable.

Then, I'm having problems with a friend of mine. He won't listen, trying to talk to him is just impossible. His dad was diagnosed with cancer and given 8-24 months to live. Since then he has beocme a dick.

Lying to his friends about being out with people, picking up strange women on the internet, and groping me like I'm some flop toy.

Boy better back up before he comes back with a nub.

What guy in his right mind, grabs a woman's hand and jerks it to his crotch and says "see how hot and wet you make me?"

DISGUSTING!

Then this same guy proceeds to tell me that my husband and I should leave a dear friend alone at Christmas and stay home to work on our *maritial* problems.

Dude, our maritial problems won't go away like that. It's all about employment and my hubby's lack thereof.

But yet he can judge?

He got a notice about his rent. This friend of mine. Said it was seriously delinquent. But he eats out for lunch every day, has a plethora of expensive toys....etc.

Sounds to me like he needs to get his life in gear.

So, I'm back to square one looking for a new *friend*. And quite honestly, the candidates are slim to none.

Oh by the way, we have an open marriage. It's complicated to explain, but to make a long story short, we can each have 1 *friend* of a sexual nature, as long as we both approve of him/her.

And I love my husbands *friend* she's a blast.

We joke and tell everyone he got a 6ft blonde for christmas.

Well, she is a 6ft blonde.

Right now I'd settle for short, dark and funny.

And right this minute I'm logging off and going to bed.

Namaste y'all.

Much love to my peeps. lol

I remain.

Me.

Have you ever felt betrayed? I mean like a ton of bricks just crashed on to your chest and won't be moved?

I have.

I found the betrayal out on this past Friday.

I was perusing the internet, trying to dig up some information on someone who has been giving me grief.

Someone suggested I look on the registered sex offenders list for my county.

I did.

His picture was not on there.

Someone else's was.

The confusing thing is, why should I feel betrayed?

I'm not in a relationship with this guy.

I don't know the whole story.

Yet, the words "indecent liberties with a child" freaked me out.

Until I found out this, I thought this guy was awesome.

He's the hero type.

He's quiet.

He's just someone I loved to be around.

Now, I don't know.

I guess, if he wants to, I'll listen to him talk.

But right now, I feel betrayed.

And hurt.

And I really don't know why.

Oh wait a minute. Yes I do.

Do YOU know why?

Well, I can't say that today totally sucked.

I left work at noon, came to the college, and am playing on VR for 2 hours till I get in to see the financial aid people.

They have screwed me over yet again. I can not believe that they ALLOW little punk girls to run the show and give people bad information.

I will deal with them.

Last night, I got a phone call about 9pm, I am now on the Board of Directors for a non profit organization.

Yee hah! It's HSA and I'm stoked.

So far, the only bad thing about today is the fact I didn't get to mess with Dan like I normally do.

I really look forward to 3 o'clock.



Ever get the feeling, that if I was allowed to bite, I would?

Good, that's exactly what I mean.

Hugs and kisses to the faithful.