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Why is that such a hard thing to describe?...I know I can't really describe it, i've tried...I may be young turn 18 next month...And alot of people say i'm too young to understand what love is...but to be honost no one really knows what it is...this may get confusing only because I usually never write my thoughts down...lol..but try to keep up...I can say that I have loved many and been loved by many...I have been in love and have fallen out of love...I've broken hearts and have mine ripped to shreads...all for this thing we call love...If you really think about people do alot of crazy things for love, people will cheat, steal, lie, and even kill for the one they love...Now that is some crazy shit right there...Can you image killing someone for love? I can't...but then again I can...



I feel in love with a man who goes by the name of Stars and let me tell you...Him and I together is amazing, but also a disaster...You see we both have commitment issues...we don't like to be stuck with one person because we don't know how to handle that sort of situation. I blame my childhood...he probably does too...lol...but idk...I believe we're scared to actually let ourselves love someone else, because we don't want to be hurt...now I love that man to death...He actually gets me gets me...and thats hard to find someone who knows exactly where your coming from...



Do you still follow?...because I do babble on and on...and I get off topic...lol...and will get even more confusing so please bare with me...If you were to ask me have I ever loved someone...I would say yes...If you ask me if i've ever been in love with someone...I would say yes...If you ask me have I ever been heartbroken...Definately...I have been so depressed because Stars and I have split that I truely feel like nothing else in this world matters...



So love huh...I believe Love is the root of all evil...but you know what It's also our best friend...You know I was trying to make a point with this...I truely was, but now it seems that i'm just talkin out the yin yang...and cant stop lol...sorry...I have a hard time focusing...anyways...



Point blank and I know I didn't really get into depth about it, but hey it's my journal...lol...anyway



Point blank: Love is the root of all evil :-)

So...it is January...my birthday is coming up in february...I'll finally be 18, and i feel as though Its time I start talking...I don't do a whole lot on here, but idk I guess its time for a little change ya know...Well first off I got accepted to Sullivan University in Louisville, Kentucky...I will be attending there this summer for baking and pastry arts...Im really happy and excited but then the other part of me is a little scared because well...I'm dependant on my brother and sister who have been taking care of me my senior year....Ok so maybe i'm also nervous about the whole paranoia thing...I know im gonna feel like I have to watch my back so my brother and sister-in-law don'r see me...It a force of habit...I have some things to hide from them...And as far as i'm concerned I am in no rush in letting them find out...so I sit here and wait for graduation day so I can get the hell out of here..but not so much as in moving into the dorm at my college...If i'm rambling and this is getting a little confusing it's because...where i'm at it 2:21 in the morning i'm tired as hell and sick as fuck...Just saying...lol...but yeah I thought i'd start writing in my journal more often now...lol...and you can write me comments or anything of that sort...