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this week has been going good, i have been in a good mood and so have most of my friends. it is nice to know that we can still have this days and not think that we are doomed to bad ones for the rest of our life. this is going to be short but i thought i should write in and catch everyone up.



my mom is doing much better, for those who dont know she has lung cancer and she wasnt given much time left, so we are making it the best. my dad has also been in a out of the hospital with sever diabeties, 3 major arteries are blocked and he needs surgery. But other then that we are haveing a great time getting to re know eachother and spend time with everyone.



well got to go bite ya later

peace*

Ok so ya im going to start ranting again but oh well. i have had trouble with friends in the past, well its the same damb thing. im getting sick of it and i want it to stop, if it is me then i dont know what to do, but im nice person why does this keep happening to me, i sware i live in hell. well i have to go so i ya.

have any suggestion let me kno......

Is it so bad to say that you want to die. I want to, i want it so badly, i have to much pain in my life my heart, my mind and body can't take it any more. There is a saying that everyone kept teliing me " GOD wouldnt give it to you unless you couldnt handle it" well i cant handle it any more its driveing me to think about killing my self, is that what he really wants me to do. i want to run, run and never look back but i cant cause everything that is happening is so close to my life, my home , my family, and it hurts to think about leaveing them. i need help......

My day is much better today but not everthing is ok, but if you think about it not everyday could be a good day cause wrong and right have to equal out. My life is getting somewhat out of control but if i keep to myself in a little space of my own i would go insane that is what my journal is for. lol feel free to give advice a comments to me on this. but remember if you say some thing bad to me dont expect me to be nice to you.