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I hate dreaming, one because it messes with my sense of reality and it bring old wounds to the surface. I guess what I am getting at, I really hate dreams. I don't like to see the things I want to come to pass stare me in the face, and I don't like having old voices whispering in my head.
Another thing, is that most of my dreams can relate to the future of the way the past should of laid out. At least in my head it should of laid out and it just doesn't do anything. I have had a dream where I am talking to someone that I haven't talked to in a while and all he can do is bitch at me about how right he is. When all reality he isn't.
Then I had a dream where one of my friends had a baby. Something about it doesn't seem too far fetched and I am tempted to as if she is pregnant. Although, it could mean something completely different.
Then I was talking to someone that I used to be great friends with. We were just talking like normal, and for some reason it hurt to think that it could be like that again. I don't know how to explain it. Dreams drive me crazy. Although I did have some strangeness to them.
Often times people will associate loss with a death, I believe that loss comes from people walking out of our lives. Either way you look at it, dead or gone you aren't associated with them. What is left is uncertain, because we gain who we are by looking at others. It does make it hard to find that part of ourselves that we lost. Hard to believe that our sense of identity comes from someone else right?
Well, let's think about this our society is programmed to do quick fixes. When we go see a movie difficult problems are worked out within 2 hours. When we watch a show sometimes in 30 minutes. Can you see the problem? When we are hungry we pop something in the microwave, we go out to eat. We are a society that wants things that are quick and easy.
This often comes into play when people think about their emotions and it just doesn't happen that way. "Getting over something," isn't going to work because there is a process to be had. First and foremost it is normal to be an emotional wreck when this happens. You may feel sad, depressed, angry, frustrated or even numb. This all has to do with how each of us as humans process out emotions.
The second thing to do is surround yourself with a good support team. Please choose people that won't make you feel guilty for being emotional. Those are the types of people that won't be very supportive and in the end may cause the process to go on longer.
The third thing to do, is actually take care of yourself. Don't forget to do things that will help ease the emotional pain just a little. I often take pictures or I write stories, because it is a type of therapy. Also is talking to those around you.
There are several ways to go about coping but it is up to that person to make the right choice as to how they will cope with it. Just remember that it is perfectly normal to get emotional, and it can last 3 months to 2 years.
It's like this, I have had my heart broken a total of 8 times in my life. Most of my heart ache hasn't even come from relationships, but friends. All of the people I have chosen to get close to have broken my heart one way or another. Those that I am getting close to, I know will probably do it however unintentionally it was. I have watched a lot of people including myself get very bitter and closed when it comes to those that have had their hearts tampered with.
They turn into people that don't seem to understand that not everyone means to really break your heart, it just happens. I realize this, but I always hope that no matter how the other person has mishandled my heart, they are sorry for what they have done. Out the 8 people that broke my heart, I can say that half of them are actually sorry for it. The other half, are either gone from my life or they did so much damage intentionally that I don't want them a part of my life.
Relationships are two way streets, and it's those that work together that make it work. Some of the relationships I formed with these people, I was doing most of the work. Other times it was me wanting things that they weren't willing to give. It's to be expected that the other person is going to have differences.
One problem I have encountered is that sometimes people don't know how to express their emotions to you. So, they end up bottling things until it is too late. They explode and not at a very good time. Conflict is unfortunately a part of the life, and problems will arise. There are ways to deal with it in a healthy manner and actually strengthen the relationship. This was not the chase with my last heart break.
I still have hope though, I get stronger with each person that pushes me down. I heal faster, because I know what I am doing. I also deal with it well enough. It made me more angry than sad with the last person giving up on me, but that is all in the past. All I have is my future and hope.
the healthiest ways are finding an outlet to get the frustrations out, then talking to the person who triggered your frustration. But only after you get that all out first.
True, but this person decided to talk to others about the problem before expressing it to me. And when they had expressed it they had come to a solution that only benefited them.
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