The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

Rage
21:25 Aug 19 2005
Times Read: 616

I save the papers

You try to taper

As I keep giving back what you want

You keep trying to flaunt

That you want this to be real

That this will help you heal



Regain, remember that I have the strength

I just can't give you the answer you really want

You'll curse my words, because of what they do to you

You'll curse my mind, because it's intelligent

You'll curse my existance, because it annoy's you



I won't give up

Over filled my cup

I'm not really mad

It's just become really sad

That you have to restort to petty things

Just so you can say you have some fangs



Come back, remember you started it all along

You judge before being judged

You've known it all along

Pity, that I have such a simple enemy

Pity, that I can only look at you

Pity, that we are not on the same level

Pity, that I have to have such a fuck up like you



If you remember that I don't really care

Then why make such a dare

A game is what I play?

How can you say?

No, it's okay

If it makes your day

To keep trying to stomp me into the ground

But, remember what comes around, goes around



Regain,I must restraint from taking this to far

Because as I remember you're still trying to pull out

Dig, remember that this is your grave

Dig, remember that there's no one else to save

Dig, remember you're a pathetic fool

Dig, remember I'm just above you



Be careful dear "friend"

I can bring a mortal end

I'm not as stupid as you think

You silly mink

How can you believe that you can compare

When all you have against me are swares



Don't you know I'm laughing in your face

You're just another insult to embrace

I don't have to keep going with this silly little game

I see that it's taken on a different frame

Stupid, you must think so highly of yourself

Stupid, you must think that I want what you have

Stupid, you must think that I'm miserable

Stupid, you must think that I care



Funny, you believe that your better than me

Funny, you believe that you can see

Funny, you're a joke to humanity

Funny, let's end this insanity.



Don't underestimate

I'll be the testimate

That I can throw you back

See the things that you lack



I laugh, when I see you, because I know something

I laugh, when you talk, because your insults are nothing

I laugh, when I hear you, because all ashamed

I laugh, because there is more for me to gain

Fractured
07:56 Aug 17 2005
Times Read: 617




I feel a heavy rock upon my chest

Where my depression seems to rest

I feel the pain sink below

My blood streams taking to flow



I'm hurting, my bones feel fractured

As much as my heart feels shattered

I don't think you understand

This I cannot command



My bruises aren't visible to the naked eye

My sort of battle wounds don't lie

Yet, you don't see it, I press back the emotion

So, that you'll get the notion



That I'm okay, yet I lay here fractured

So, much more of me shattered

I want to say something, but I won't

Because you can't, I don't



You keep pushing, pushing me away

Something keeps crying, crying to say

You don't understand, I can't make you

You don't see it, I don't know what to do



I bend, and I feel my bones fracture

I feel my insides collaspe and shatter

My words, make no sense to me anymore

They run through me that I'm sore



I lock up so much of me

You can't handle to see

The shadows that are inside

The shadows that hide



Those flaws that I bite back

Those same flaws that attack

I'm a person, Don't you see it?

I want you to understand my fit.



I have so much built within

That it should be considered a sin

I want to cry, I want to let it all out

But, would you be there? Should I doubt?



My insecurities come to light

These are the questions I fight

Would you be there if I broke down?

Would you lift me from the ground?



Could you give me everything that I need?

Could you and I come to each others heed?

Why are you pushing me away?

Is it something I have said or say?



Will I be good enough for you?

Can I possibly do?

Will you be there if no one else is there?

Would you, Could you, possibly care?



Am I, Do I, Do you have any feelings for me?

Am I, Do I, Do you even see?

I want to cry, I want to scream, I want to fall

I want to die, I want to lie, I want to call



I want to, I have to, I need to

But, all of these things, should I do?

My mind keeps racing

My heart pacing



Should I feel at all?

Should I invest, or fall?

But, I'm out of energy, my bones no longer work

These are all apart of my flaws, my perks, my quirk



My bones still feel so factured

With my heart laying so very shattered.

Daddy
20:50 Aug 11 2005
Times Read: 630

Daddy? It's a terminology that seems rather bitter

With all the hurtful memories that litter

Up my mind, and I can't think straight

I want to cry, because of all the hate



He's never really been there

He's never really had a care

About me, or what I do

All I have is my mom to make it through



He yells at me when he gets the chance

I don't know how he could ever romance

My mother into marrying him

His hurtful words rip me limb from limb



And he does say he loves me

But, I don't see

How he could love me, and hurt me so.

Then leave me to feel so low



About myself, and how I should be

But, all I can do, is be me.

I don't want to hurt this way inside

Inside where I hide



Daddy, he doesn't know how much it hurts when he yells

But, I won't be the one that tells

Him that I hurt so bad right now

He wouldn't understand how



He's never been one to apologize first

But, how I sometimes thirst

For him to say that he is proud.

Even if it isn't too loud.



Daddy, it's a word that makes me cry

Because Daddy isn't Daddy, it's a lie

He may of married my mother, but he never raised me

He only gets credit for being the reason I be



You hurt, I don't want to call you Daddy, Father, Friend.

You've never helped, and your painful words never end.

They keep coming, going, leaving me bare

But, my feelings with you, I'll never share



You're not daddy, you're just something that married my mom

This is why I can smile and be so calm

And belating lie, and say 'I love you'

When all I wish is it was through.



You remember the time when I was seven?

You remember that time when I was elven?

Does it matter if I'm in your memory, your brain?

It's not like you care, or am I insane?



Daddy, you bastard, you've always held hate

I'm alot like you, so you berate

Me infront of my friends, and laugh in my face

But, you don't see the lump in my stomach I embrace



You say that I need to care more about me rather than them!

I'd rather tear myself limb from limb

I've never been as selfish as you

That I could never do!



Maybe I am stupid, atleast I can care!

You hurting me, just isn't fair!

I don't want to call you daddy, you never had the right!

But, I don't want Mommy and I to fight.



Because I know that she loves you, and you love her.

Yet, I must concur

With my own memories, that make me remember everything you have done

Grandma should of had a better son.



Daddy, is such a word of bittersweet memory

All this I leave within a summary.