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I'm going to flip shit. It is SO FRUSTRATING to know your body is full of what you need, but you know it won't work, it won't help you. It might calm the maddness for a few hours, maybe a day, it might stop the shaking and dizziness and fainting because your body is going into a kind of shock from not getting what it needs yet again. Yet, beside you is the person you love, who has what you NEED with a burning desire that makes you go insane, but every time you try and talk to them about it, or about the general topic, they simply pat your head and say "You'll be ok", or worse, "I'm sorry", and continue on like its no big deal, like it's some pet thing that can be made all cute and dealt with with a pat on the head. I. Am. Going. To. Go. Crazy. Then, they insist on watching a tv series filled with bloody scenes, and it just makes it worse. I don't know who or what I am anymore, I just know what I want.