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I was trying to meditate before I fell asleep, practicing a procedure i read about to try and contact my spirit guide. Well, My brain couldnt focus on what it was supposed to be seeing in my head, instead the meadow and pathway i originally had planned, was filled in with black, and i heard a dark voice and i got freaked, but at this point my mind was lost to the dream.



i was laying in my bed just as i had been when i closed my eyes to meditate. Thats why i thought it was real at first. There was a dark spirit in my room, i could barely make out its figure, but then i felt a disconnection from my body and had an out of body experience where i was chasing this spirit down, threatening it. and then i was back in my body and the room had changed, my brother and mother were in it with me and it was a kitchen. with one wall of just windows, and iw as trying ot explain to them what happened, when i felt another sense of oncoming disconnection, bubt was able to stop it. then i see these corpse, skeletal, and demonic type figures outside the window wall and they kept coming close to the window so i could see them through the darkness, and then spirit like, they came rushing at me, and i ducked and put my arms in front of my face instinctively and told them to stop, but they kept coming, and then looking back up at my mother, she transformed into one of them. and laughed in my face.

then my mind told myself that it was a dream to wake up, so i opened my eyes and thought i was awake, i was back in my room. and i felt the strange tugging sensation from the end of my bed. and pulled my sheets back up, then i felt it on my pillow, and pulled that up, onl to find that the crystals i had stored in the pillow case were out and destroyed. and i could feel the heaviness of the darkness weigh in on me, and then i woke up for real and couldnt stop shaking. i was on the verge of tears.



its like my mind was not opening to the light that i tried to picture before.....that once night falls, my mind is lost to it.

My dreams were kinda wierd.



The first one, there was this small house but seemed like a motel almost, and I was partying with some friends and Max Green and Ronnie Radke from Escape The Fate were there too and apparently we were friends. I left suddenly because I had gotten a phone call from a friend who was having problems with her oven. When I went outside it was like our house was in the middle of a park, so I started walking away and then came to a picnic table piled full of my old barbie dolls. Then some ghetto ass chick said she was gonna go back and claim Ronnie as her boyfriend and she tried so hard but nothing came of it.

When I got back, Max was like "thank god, hes been smoking nonstop since you left and is all jittery and acting like a nervous wreck since you left. I think hes addicted to you and your presence."

And the same thing happened a few other times when i left during the dream. At one time, Max asked me to pick up his girlfriend from Best Buy (where she works) and he was like "i love a girl in uniform" and i said "its a blue shirt and khaki pants..." and he said, "its still a uniform" and i left and brought back pizza. At this time the ghetto chick had drugged Ronnie and there was some kind of wedding ceremony going on.

But I showed up in time to stop it. Ronnie saw me and smiled, I guess he knew how he really felt about me and I ran and kissed him.







The second dream was about me and my sister winning tickets to meet Fall Out Boy (yes, a goth kid who likes FOB, get over it, I have a wide taste in music)

So we were backstage and my sis got to meet all the other bands she likes too (Academy Is..., Cute is what we aim for, gym class heroes, etc)

Then, Patrick shows up and asked if I was really goth or just dressed that way for Pete's sake (Pete Wentz) and my sis told him I was really goth. Then pete showed up and we all hung out.

Then I was suddenly working in some diner adn then got all fancied up for a date with a guy I called Prince Charming, (i never saw his face) and he was an amazing kisser as he kissed me good nite and left me with a single red rose, then lots of time went by, and i found his number in a piece of paper that said prince charming and we went out again and lived happily ever after, but then it was like I had been watching it as a movie with another guy cuz i heard myself say it never really happens like that. Then I woke up.

Well, ever since I started wearing my amethyst necklace to bed at night, my nightmares have yet to return.



Why did I start doing this you ask?



Because I read the crystal healing book in the pack I bought.

Amethyst helps with recurring nigtmares. So, lets hope they stay away for good.

Nitemare

19:49:26 - Oct 17 2007

Times Read: 15



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I had another one. Another nitemare. It was the same girl I've seen before in my bedroom. The first time, I remember she was happy and playing with bubbles, until she realized I was watching, she didnt like that and I remember having a hard time breathing.



This time, she came up to the edge of my bed and immediately started strangling me after she asked who I was. I told her I didnt want to hurt her, that i was there to help her, she kinda loosened her grip at that point, but the dream started fading just as i was asking what her name was.



Shes about 5 yrs old, with thin blonde hair. After last night, i remembered having dreams about her when i was younger. When i lived in my old house, the one i constantly have nitemares about. They are always based in the one area of the house, and last nite was in one of the bedrooms.





Now, I have no idea what any of this means. I've read up on pscyhic impressions, but those are left behind in places....they dont follow people as far as i know. So, yet again, i have no idea what is going on inside my brain. And i honestly dont know where to get help.

strange dreams

03:24:20 - Oct 01 2006

Times Read: 26



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ok, i just woke up from the strangest set of dreams i've had in awhile. here goes....





i had just gotten home from work and had seen some kind of show that day that can sometimes give u nightmares. well i happened to see an episode that was creepy and saw it rite b4 bed. i was laying in bed and there were other ppl in the room as well. someone in the center was asking if we ever felt like there really was someone else in our houses/apts/rooms even though all may be quiet, how often do u feel uncomfortable in that silence? i started mentiong dreams i'd had a bout a coworker, they were bloody and morbid. that nite as i closed my eyes, i had sensed something off. there was someone laying next to me, and i had remembered them saying that they would protect me no matter what. they would protect me from the ppl in the nite that come and take u and kill u. i felt his arm leave me in the mid of the nite, and heard his muffled cries, i didnt want to open my eyes to see what they were doing to him. as soon as i didnt hear anything, i ran off to find other ppl who had survived these nite hunters so far. eventually these hunters narrowed it down to only wanting me. i escaped the house, and was cloaked in the darkness. they couldnt see me until they threw this bomb type thing in the air and it exploded with yellow lites that would attach to you and make u visible to them. i jumped and hopped around, avoiding their touch at all costs. i had to get to darkened ground, the lite of the morning was rising. and i nearly missed them and a train. i went back in the house to gather the others and we had found a secret compartment. nite fell early that day, and we got caught trying to get into the caompartment. we all made it ouside and saw where they kept their victims. the one who was supposed to protect me,,was all tied up and bloody, shaking....another girl had eaten herself to death. another had turned into a batch of spiders that ended up crawling up into the floorboards of the house....



i dunno, it may not sound too bad written out, but thats cuz a lot of details couldnt be explained becuz they were just too hard to describe. but this dream was creepy as fuck.

another strange one

12:09:37 - Oct 01 2006

Times Read: 25



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after i wrote about that last one, i went back to sleep and deamt again. this time it wasnt so creepy.





i won a backstage pass to a cabaret type of show, one that Brenden from P!ATD was starring in. i was shown the makeup/costumes/ etc and they even did my makeup and put me in a costume. brenden showed up and we started talking. i remembered his makeup in "i write sins not tragedies" video and seeing a poster later on for clockwork orange....the same eye makeup.....so i started talking about it and he really took a liking to me. he invited me to this garden party thing, it was some kind of magical garden, plants constantly changing and evolving. we all had masquerade masks on, and we had shown up in the white car from "its better if you do" video. i remember a lot of magic, me getting lost in the garden, him findin me and showing me a secret section of the garden where he kissed me....then morning came and everyone had disappeared and a beautiful gate ws formed from vines as the owners of this garden showed up in their 'tin lizzy'. it was all an old fashioned dream pretty mcuh but it was very interesting, and he was a great kisser. LOL

Evil in my dreams.....

13:28:18 - May 04 2006

Times Read: 34



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For years I've had a reocurring theme of evil in my dreams. It doesnt happen every time I sleep, but it does a lot of the time. And always it takes place in the house I grew up in.



Now, dont get the wrong idea or anything, I had a great childhood. My parents are still together and there was never any abuse or anything so dont think that that may be the source of these dreams.



I think something bad happened in that house before we ever moved in, and something lingered behind and has been haunting me ever since. In most of my dreams that I've had of this house, there has been an evil and very strong force that dwells in the two bedrooms i had while living there. And every time, it always either forces me out of the room and slams the door on my face or it traps me inside. Also, I've always had strange feelings about those rooms, even while I lived there. I never really felt comfortable in them. I always had the feeling that I was being watched. Another issue is with my dolls...even years before the Toy Story movie came out, I've always felt that my dolls would be animated, either while im sleeping or while im away, by something dark. And another issue that still haunts me is closets. I dunno, maybe its just a typical childhood fear of "monsters in the closet" that I just cant get over, but the thing is, its never been monsters that I've been afraid of in the closets, its people. I've always been afraid of people coming out of my closet at night. One thing with those rooms actually started my fear of the dark. (I'm no longer afraid of it, but I was terrified of it when I lived there) The lights in the bedrooms and just outside the bedrooms at the top of the stairs would always burn out.....a lot of the times after only being installed for a short amount of time. If I ever needed it on during the day, it would gladly turn on for me, but at night, thats when they would always burn out. I really dont know what went on in that house. I did only recently find out that it was haunted. My dad told me. BUt he told me that whatever it was, it was never evil or threatening feeling.



Yesterday I actually recalled a dream that I had involving that house, and something that may have happened or be tied to it somehow. There was a man that came into the house one day and committed suicide off of our balcony. His suicide though saved my life in the dream, it made me a bit kooky afterwards (mostly still in shock) but as I was walking into my bedroom, someone stabbed me from behind and I immediately woke up because I could feel a sharp sensation in the same area of my own back, as if I had really been in my dream. And a dream I had recently was about a girl, who had an evil side to her and when she got me distracted, the evil side of her disconnected and came after me.



Maybe nothing happened in that house, maybe its all just some figment of my imagination that has manifested into something stronger. Maybe these dreams are about me. Maybe I have an evil side to me or something. Or maybe these dreams show me my fate. Maybe I'm to come across a person sometime in my life that has an evil side to them and maybe im to die at their hand. Who knows. I hope its not the latter... I just really dont know what to think of these dreams anymore. If anyone who reads this, has any idea as to what they may mean, I'd love to hear from you.