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Maybe it would be better

if i didn't exist

or we never met at all.

All my life I've been going down hill

into a never-ending darkness.

A darkness that drowns me

and will never let me go

as if i were a ship lost at sea.

A darkness of depression

torment and despair

its color is black

filling every corner

hiding in every part of my soul.

"I'm drowning" I scream out loud

and pray for someone to help

but no-one hears me

because I'm so secluded in darkness

nobody can see me as I see them

they are full of light

happy and joyful something I am not.

On the other hand

something in this darkness

seems to comfort me

as if this was how it was meant to be

to be hated? to be shunned?

something is tugging

tugging on my heart my body my soul

pulling me deeper into my struggle.

I fight for breath

but my lungs are so compressed that I cannot.

The pain I feel is indescribable

I'm unable to think

I can hardly move

I'm covered in emotional scars

that the human eye cant see

hidden bruises on my skin

caused from forces unseen.

My untimely death

should not take me long to formulate

but the darkness holds me back

i hear my voice

but of a language not my own

as if I were speaking dead Latin

a language lost long ago.

Voices are screaming inside my own head

in languages i don't understand

but only one of those voices translates

"Everyone hates you"

"Nobody cares"

"Your better off dead"

I feel chains tie me down

I'm unable to move

invisible needles stab into my skin

filling me with poison

invisible knives cut and stab me

missing my most vital organs

then i realize they didn't cut me far enough

I am hardly bleeding.

The chains begin to tighten

holding me in place.

Hopefully sometime soon

someone will hear my cries of pain

and bring me out of my eternal darkness

and that person will be

my own personal savior

who will save me....

from myself.

COMMENTS

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ShiruTelal
02:19 Nov 25 2009

Beautiful words! I feel the pain within them...

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