The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

Nice, I wrote a bit more on the story/book I'm trying to work on. When I get some momentum going on it I'll be happy. After I get a bit more to it and some coherence going I might post soem in here but I haven't decided yet.

Today was a good day. I slept reasonably enough and then I went over to Tina's. While I was there she cooked me dinner just because I said I was hungry. Nobody has done that for me since I was a small child, I was nearly speechlees (let's face it, me being completely speechless is about as likely as every single person on this planet being happy all at the same time, it's possible but highly unlikely). She even gave me a neck and back rub, considering how much pain I've been in the last couple of days it was pure ecstasy.



Despite it being a subdued day and having slept, I still feel tired as hell and I really want to go to bed right now. The sleep I've been getting lately just doesn't seem to do any good.

This is weird even for me. The last three times I've gone to sleep I've had the same dream, it's not the repetition that's weird though. The whole dream consists of me blowing myself. What's up with that?

I sat with the shower blowing hot water on my neck for about half an hour and that helped a lot. Now the muscles just feel sore and abused instead of feeling like they're shredding with each movement. So no doctor for me, phew.

Really, really, really, horny.



You know that sinus pressure you get behind your eyes that you just can't get rid of, you can relieve it a little for a bit but then it just comes back and all the worse? That's what this is like. No matter what I do I can't get rid of it and it keeps getting worse. I swear it's driving me to new depths of insanity. You would think after having gone 19 years before I finally gave up my virginity that eight and a half months without wouldn't be that bad but it's killin' me.

My neck is getting worse, I might have to go to the doctor tomorrow. Dang it, I really don't want to have to go to the doctor. If it gets any worse by tomorrow I'll go or if it doesn't start getting better in the next few I'll try to make myself go. No promises though.

So today the newest employee and waste of space came in a couple hours before her shift and quit. She quit because, you're going to love this, the lady that came in for the shift after her wouldn't clock in early so she could clock out and leave early. So long, farewell, jump off a cliff and die (said to that song the kids sing in the sound of music). She wasn't even here a week and she'd already proven herself useless. How you ask? Shit, she never once stayed for her whole shift, she didn't pay attention, and she wasn't even willing to do all of her job. She made it clear from the git go that she was more interested in how soon she could clock out and go than in getting her job done.



I. Hate. People. Like. That.



Is it so fucking hard to have at least half an ounce of work ethic? We all, at some point in our lives as working stiffs, can't wait to be able to clock out and chill. Those of us worth something will stick to it! I do understand that there are some jobs some people just can't but a good work ethic says you should try, at least long enough to give your employer proper notice. Four days is NOT trying. One week is NOT trying. I had THE shittiest job (with the exception of the jobs that actually deal with that, heh heh, kidding) in the world and I was there for at least three months. But this job? C'mon. Yeah it's boring, yes the people are annoying, and I know it does suck having to fix almost everyone else's mistakes but it really isn't that bad. Right now, let's get a few things straight.



McDonald's - Depending on the store, it's actually not all that bad of a place to work. Don't be afraid to have fun but make sure it doesn't get in the way of work, and be prepared for picky and smart alec customers. Getting into a store with a few long term employees on staff is best.



Dairy Queen - Same as McD's



Convenice store - Most are actually pretty good to great jobs.



Department stores - It does vary but in general these jobs are good. Be prepared for a lot of standing and getting blamed for not having the right stock. Getting into a smaller store means less pay but it also usually means more flexibility and over-all friendlier customers. Sometimes you just have to smile and say thank you/have a nice day. A tip to keep in mind: sir and ma'am will get you a few points with some of the slightly over middle age crowd, getting into the elderly crowd they'll probably smart off at you about it and the younger generation will either ignore it or possibly be offended with a small few appreciating it.



Grocery store - Good to great depending on the location, there may be an occasional sucky one in there.



Ink/Chemical factory - SUCKS The pay is nice in general but the potential health issues, the often excessive hours, and the back in high school type of atmosphere make it not the most desireable.



Janitorial - Ranges from suck to great. It all depends one where and who for this one. You have to be suited for it, where you're working, and who you're working for. Contracting is usually the way to go but you have to have some good references before anyone will accept your bid, try sub-contracting for a while first.



Hotel clerk - You're rollin' the dice on this one, there's no way to tell beforehand if it is a good job for you or not. No two hotels are the same (ok, realistically there are probably a couple who are the same but you get my drift) and not everybody is suited for any of them.



Military - Nowhere even near to being close to being as bad as most people make it out to be. Many of the fields you can go into are just like regular 9 to 5s. There are only certain exceptions to that, unless you are called into battle but even then a good deal of them still are these days. They just have a lot more rules to follow and in the early days you have to put up with a lot of yelling. If you're like me, basic training is actually a little fun.

Person: How can you be compassionate and caring and not give a shit at the same time?



Me: Well, there's two ways it works and they're quite simple really.



Perons: Ok?



Me: You see, I care about the individual. You show me one person who's suffering and don't point out any others and I feel the urge to help them. On the other hand, show me a nation who's suffering and I say they should suck it up and damn well figure it out themselves. I applaud those who do care about the masses but it's just not in me.



Peron: Ok, what about the second way.



Me: As previously stated, I tend to be caring person when it comes to individual needs. However, I'm of the personal opinion that the world can go fuck itself and cease to be tomorrow and I'd be perfectly fine with that. Hell, give me a good apocolypse and we'll make it a party. So I want their suffering to end but I think that an end to existence is just as good as any, far better than the idea of paradise.



Person: Now what's wrong with paradise?



Me: Just stop and think about the whole concept. Not every body in the world has the same ideas on what makes up a paradise. Tell me, what's a white supremecist's paradise? Or a radical Muslim's? Or that uppitty Brittish guy who thinks "all Yanks should bugger off and die"?



Person: But, in a paradise all of that would be gone. We'd all be happy together.



Me: Exactly.



Person: I don't get it.



Me: If we all got along and were happy together than we wouldn't really all be us now would we? You would have to change almost every person on the planet in signifigant enough ways for that to happen that would really turn them into someone else, taking away their identity man. It's not a name that makes a person's identity but them. Take away that stuff and you take away them. Don't get me wrong, I think that all the creeps like that should shove a cork of C-4 up there rears and have a nice day. On the other hand, it is their right to be racist or "I'm better than you" asses if they want.



Person: Anybody ever tell you that you're a bit touched in the head?



Me: Heh.



One of these days I'll run for president just so that I can tell the whole nation these views. *sighs* That'll be the day, knowin' my luck they'd like it enough to vote me into office though. *evil laughter* Oohh, now wouldn't that be fun? Me as president.

Son of a gun my neck hurts! I don't know what the deal is but if I didn't know better I'd say it's whiplash, thankfully I haven't done anything to get whiplash. I have a very pressing urge to pull my head from it to get rid of the pain, it's right at the point where my neck meets my head. I would kill for a massage, maybe I can talk Tina into it tomorrow.



On a side note: I wrote this with my eyes closed and facing away from the screen, I'm not sure whether that's sad or amazing.

*sighs* It's bedtime, I even feel tired, but I don't feel llke sleeping. I feel the urge to do things when I really just want to pass out.

I was sitting there, bored and letting my mind wander, when the best image popped into my head at random. I suddenly pictured some soldiers going to shoot at each other but when they pulled the trigger techno music came out instead of bullets.

Too bad randomly blowin' shit up is illegal, it would be so much fun right now. Oh, lighting things on fire! *sighs*

The website I got this from called it a Stock Market Crash, the recipe is as follows:



1/2 shot Jack Daniel's® Tennessee whiskey

1/2 shot Yukon Jack® Canadian whisky

1/2 shot Southern Comfort® peach liqueur

1/2 shot Wild Turkey® bourbon whiskey

1/2 shot black rum

fill with Coca-Cola®

ice cubes

I wonder, if all the weopons in the world turned into some kick ass techno cd, what would happen?

How do we know that we truly exist? There have been various answers to this, "I think therefore I am" among the most famous. When it comes right down to it, most of the so called 'proof' offered by people is their existence. So then tell me, does existing prove that we exist? Are we merely shadows cast by the sun during the day to be gone by night? Those who don't fade at their end continue to be only because of those after them but if we might not exist, what does that say of them? Existence is truly evanescent, perceived for a moment and then gone but for a memory. So I suppose that existence is defined by our perception of it. Since existence is our true reality, then maybe reality is perception after all? Where is the line drawn between what is and what we perceive? We are like the silent voice upon the wind, the only one's who know if the voice was are those to hear it.

They say that there's no rest for the wicked, if that's true than I must be pretty damned evil most of the time because I find it hard as hell to sleep. I went to bed at 1 and it took me forever to fall asleep, then I wake up around 5:30. What's with that? I only got 3 hours of sleep at most and I don't feel tired. I do have a nasty kink in my neck though.



I'm starvin' like crazy man, I'm ordering a pizza. Large pan crust with pepperoni and extra cheese. I would ask for some bacon on it but they consistantly fuck it up when I do. Hmm, maybe I should order dominoes instead?... Hmmm. Nah.



I have the desire to cut myself just to watch me bleed. Strange isn't it? I get this from time to time, those are also the times where I tend to feel my most sadistic.



Well my mind is wanderin' and my belly rumblin'. Time to go call for dinner. Peace out.

Today was a good day at first. I went home and tried to go to sleep, since I couldn't I watched Casino Royale until I did for about 3 hours. I got up, got dressed and what not, and then walked up to walk Tina home from work. I hung out at her place until about 8:30 and then went home so I could eat before work. That's where it went wrong. I fell asleep after I ate and didn't wake up until work called ten minutes after I was supposed to be in. That's twice in the last two weeks that's happened, I don't know what's up. Then I get here and immediately have a problem to fix. One of our rooms that they had checked in was dirty and they couldn't contact anybody from housekeeping to get it cleaned. Thankfully we had a cancellation so that we were able to switch their room and I comped it. I am just in a really friggin' sour mood tonight.

The other day Tina and I were discussing what we'd be like as parents. She said I'd be the kind of father that would sit on the porch with a shotgun within arms reach when my daughter's boyfriend comes over to pick her up for the first time. I said that's ridiculous. I'm the kind who would sit on the porch cleaning a sword and explain to him how to filet a human with it, and then I'd offer to take him out to a shooting range sometime so I could show him how to pick off a target at 300 yards without a scope. See? I'm a reasonable guy.

Have you ever had a violent dream that you were wounded in and then woke up to find bruises and cuts in the same places as you got in the dream? It's creepy.

Friggin' people. There's this guy that stays here every couple of weeks and he's typically an ass when he does. He comes to check in tonight and asks for a wake up call, then proceeds to complain that the last time he stayed here he didn't get one even though he asked. BULL.... CRAP! I know for a fact he got it because I'M the one who did it. He had it set for 6 and 6:30 and I made BOTH calls! Now he has the balls to sit here and tell ME that he didn't get it. It's not really a big deal but it pisses me off.



On another note: How irrational am I?



A friend of my cousin's tagged her in some pics of here and her bf and I'm bored so I look at them. I'm sitting here looking at this guy and going over in my head how much I don't like him and then it hits me, how can I and why do I dislike him when I've never even met him beyond a brief online conversation? I was sitting there being all judgemental and not liking him simply because he's dating Jenna. Overprotective much? *shakes head at self*

The world can go fuck itself for all I care right now, I just don't give a shit at the moment.

I just finished reading Dead Witch Walking and I like it. Now the only problem is that I have to read the rest of the series and my local library doesn't have a single one, I had to get this one through inter-library loan. I suppose $2 is a small price to pay for a good book.



I slept for about six hours today and when I woke up it took me a few minutes to realize that I was awake and not still dreaming. I don't remember what I was dreaming about when I woke up though.



Tuesday is my day off, Tina and I put dinner off until then. She needed to go to Wal-Mart and I thought we were going to so I didn't buy the pork chops, we didn't end up going though since she was so tired.



I found a really comfortable chair at the Salvation Army that I want but if I buy it I'll have to carry it home. I can't make up my mind whether or not to buy it.



As convenient as Huron is right now since I can walk everywhere, I've decided that I don't want to live here long term. It's an ok little town but I miss the variety of a bigger area. I miss devent malls. I miss the selection that grocery stores carry. I'll probably be here another year or so but I want to move eventually. The only problem I foresee right now is that I don't know whether or not Tina would be willing to. It's strange, for some reason I'm still set on Buffalo. I only spent one day there but I felt more comfortable and more at home there than I ever have anywhere else. Since I've paid off my debt and will be able to save money I'm first going to save up to buy a car, than to get my teeth fixed, and after that for moving. I don't know how long each will take but I've got my mind set on the matter. I just hope Tina will be willing to move because I swear I am not leaving this girl.

COMMENTS

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MBK
04:23 Oct 20 2008

Our Library does suck something fierce lol.





Huron is good for it's small size.

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POST COMMENT

ChroniX Aggression. Check it out, it rocks!

I laugh like an evil genius who has just escaped from the psych ward, or so Tina says. I think that's a compliment.



It's been a good day, work last night seemed even more laid back than usual and today is payday! Not a huge check but it's fuckin' awesome since I have no bills to come out of it! I put $250 into my savings account and it's staying there unless I absolutely must use it and I have one more payday this month, every-other paycheck I'm going to have a couple hundred left over from now on... Boo- fuc-king-ya baby. I've promised myself that I won't go spend happy, I want to save up. There are a lot of things that I want but I'm going to get them one at a time slowly, little by little. The two things at the top of my priority list, as far as big spending goes, are fixing my teeth and getting a reliable vehicle. I'm not sure which order they go in though. One side of the argument is that the teeth are more important but the other side says that a vehicle is a more immediate concern, the sad part is that they cost about the same. Well, I suppose it's time for bed since I want to get up in 3 1/2 hours. Peace out.

Well, while I'm at work tonight I'm going to update and print off a copy of my resume. SuperX doesn't have apps yet so I'm taking that in there. Tomorrow's payday so I've got to pick up the good ol' pay check and deposit it, in the afternoon I'm going down to Wal-Mart with Tina and I'm probably going to turn in an app. there too. Next week I'm going to set up an appointment to see the doctor, I'm having some trouble with bleeding and it's starting to worry me now that it's been a few months. I have trouble with my red cell count being too high and I don't know if it's related or not. Time for work, lata.

*sighs* Things to do, things to do... I need to finish cleaning, I want to remember to take my resume in to SuperX since they don't have applications yet and that means I'll need to take it to a computer with a printer, I SHOULD go down to Wal-Mart and put in an app. but I'm still undecided on that, and I need to do some grocery shopping: pork chops, biscuits, and bread.

I'm bored and I have nothing to do... *sighs*

Somebody tell me, why does holding a proper posture make me look like I'm sticking my chest out? I know I've got a thick torso but... *shrugs*

Today I was given the best random comment ever...



"You don't just march to the beat of a different drum, you dance to the rhythm of your own techno song."



I love you mysterious ride offering guy! Since moving here I've run into this guy in various places a handfull of times and he always offers me a ride.

Note to self: Don't accidently hit enter when you're still in headline field.

It's a term I'm very familiar with. Even my friends will say that I can be one, they'd be the first actually. I'm not irrational, tactless, cruel, or spiteful. I'm mischievous, a little unfriendly at times, and occasionally bad tempered. If I don't like you I make it plain, if you piss me off you're going to see it (unless you're a customer), and if I'm in the right mood I can play some of the best pranks or come out with some of the best sarcasm. It's just me. For cryin' out loud, I once had one of my friends convinced for almost the whole school day that he was color blind. Being an asshole usually isn't a good thing but it's not always a bad thing. Anybody who is put into a position of authority in a work environment needs to know how to be one or they're likely to end up being walked over by their staff, not always but I've seen it happen again and again.



Well, I'm done thinking for the moment and I need to get ready for work.

Holy shit dude! Everything on VR is 3-D when your eyes are wiggin' out! Oh yeah, I don't recommend watching flash animation if VR looks like this even though it's wicked cool. Anywho, too long no sleep. Time for my slice of death, heh heh heh. Wow I'm lame.

*sighs* I swear I really need to get some soon, right now it's so bad I'm tempted to go hump a lightpole.



Six and a half months Tina and I have been together now. This girl is amazing. If it weren't for her I wouldn't be on my feet right now, I'd still be struggling alone and miserable. I seriously dig this girl and we're both really happy together. The problem is that I got used to not having to wait and now I am. Well, it's not the waiting so much as not really understanding why and there's no way for me to since she doesn't even know. I have no aversion to waiting but the lack of understanding is driving me insane. I've been waiting and I'll continue to do so, I just wish there was something I could do.

Well, here's a secret that not many people know about me. It's not something amazing or deep or even all that personal, it's just something few to no people know. I'm a good dancer.My only real problem is that I'm too self-conscious and that holds me back and that's why I don't go dancing and have only been seen doing so twice in public.It makes me feel really out of place when I try. So, there you have it.

Today (today for me and yesterday for you non-overnighters) was good, I went to bed a little after 8 and woke up at 3. From there I got up and did a bit of straighening up but not as much as I was planning, from there I went and spent $100 on a new pair of shoes... Ugh, can't say that I like having spent that much but if you consider that if they last me 1 year that'll come to about $9 a month. After the shoes I walked down to Wal-Mart in the rain, my head phones blew out on the left side on the way so I had to buy new ones, and did some necessary shopping. I should have checked out prices on vaccums while I was there but I guess I can do that tomorrow or Wednesday. I was happy to note when I got home that my foot wasn't killing me and my knee wasn't swollen more than usual. Then I kicked some ass on my game and listened to music. Not a busy day but a good one and I have the next two off. I will be cleaning, I also need to remember to double check that the payment on my med bills came out and if it did I will officially be debt free!



I've been living on my own for a little over six months now and I think that I should work on getting my own furnishings and householdy type stuff. I think it's a good time for it since I'll start having about an extra $300 a month not going out. Well, I'm debating between that, a vehicle, and incurring a dental debt. I need to call the dentist tomorrow to see if they can give me a ball park price for the work I need done, I just need my other tooth pulled and a new partial. Sometime in the next couple of years I'll get a permanent fix.



I'm in the best shape I've been in for several years. I'm starting to get a decent muscle tone going on my upper body but it's still hidden beneath extra flesh. I'm not noticably overweight if I stand up properly and that's kick ass since I haven't been able to say that since I was in about the fifth or sixth grade.



Well, I guess that's it for now. Peace out.