God I'm sooo horny. Yesterday I masturbated 4 times and twice today already. I feel like I need to again! My mind keeps turning to sex too, which isn't helping. I think I'm going to buy a toy or two to help.
This is the first night in the last week or two that we haven't stayed up all night talking. I sat here watvhing my shows and enjoying a little solitude. It was kinda nice since I haven't had any by myself time in a while, yet it didn't feel right. I felt a little lonely and I kept looking at my messenger to see if she came online. *chuckles* I guess I'm hooked. Even though she needed rest, I wish that I hadn't told her to go to sleep.
I've got a pickle, I've got a pickle, I've got a pickle, hey hey hey hey! lol, Sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo happy right now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I think Imust have annoyrd the shit out of my co-worker tonight, but she made the mistake of asking. They ask and you shall recieve, if that's true, than why haven't I got a million dollars yet?
Five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes, five hundred twenty-five thousand moments so dear, five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes, how do you measure, measure a year? I like that song, had to sing it in 7th grade chorus. I miss playing the viola, I was good at it!! Speaking of music, I got overtime today. It's a good thing even if it is because one of my co-workers is suffering. OMG, the assistant manager basically gave me permission to hurt my obnoxious co-worker, booya!! Suddenly I'm hungry, lol. Omg are you actually reading this? Here's a gold star!!! Oi!! I can't sit still!!
I woke up this morning to get the most wonderful surprise! My Darling called me! YAY! She has a very beautiful voice, I am so happy. So far all that has come with today is GOOD!
About Me Personality Quiz | |
What Is Your Name?: | Placidchaos by choice and personality, my givenname I will not put |
How Old Are You?: | 20 |
When Is Your Birthday?: | 6/15 |
What Is Your Zodiac Sign?: | Gemini |
Where Were You Born?: | central Iowa |
What Color Eyes Do You Have?: | vibrant deep blue to bluish steel grey |
What Color Is Your Hair?: | blonde |
How Tall Are You?: | 5' 11" ? |
How Much Do You Weigh?: | 235 lbs |
What Is You Ethnicity?: | mut, mostly Irish and german |
What Is Your Worst Fear?: | |
What Is Your Greatest Achievement?: | depends on what you consider a great achievement, but I'm proud to hav scored higher than 98% on annual standardized tests in school and near perfect on the asvab |
Are You Dependable And/Or Trustworthy?: | Yes |
If You Had A Choice About How You Were Going To Die What Would It Be?: | hmmm |
Do You Suffer From Depression And/Or Anxiety?: | no |
Have You Ever Tried To Commit Suicide?: | no, no offense to anyone, but I view it as a coward's escape |
Have You Ever Purposely Caused Harm To Yourself Or Someone Else?: | yes, but they had it coming |
Are You A Paranoid Person?: | not particularly |
Do You Get Jealous Of Other People?: | not so much |
Are You Obsessive And/Or Compulsive?: | from time to time, I count my stairs though |
Are You Hyper Active?: | I have ADHD, what do you think? |
Are You A Violent Person?: | by nature yes, but I contain it |
Do You Take Your Anger Out On Other People?: | only if they're the cause |
Do You Blame Other People For Your Mistakes?: | in jest |
What Is Your Favorite Strategy Game?: | chess |
What Is Your Favorite Movie?: | who knows |
Who Is Your Favorite Band?: | Evanescence |
What Is Your Favorite Song?: | hmmm |
Who Is Your Favorite Actor/Actress?: | none |
Who Is Your Favorite Celebrity?: | no one |
What is Your Favorite Color?: | I have several |
What Is Your Favorite Food?: | it's a toss up, pizza or my home made beef and noodles |
What Is Your Favorite Drink?: | Coca-Cola |
Are You A Virgin?: | no |
Are You Kinky?: | only certain women know |
Do You Masturbate?: | yes |
Do You Watch Pornography?: | sometimes |
Have You Ever Dyed Your Hair An Unusual Color?: | not really |
Have You Ever Shaved Your Hair In A Socially Unacceptable Way?: | no |
Do You Have Any Religious Beliefs?: | not specifically |
Do You Have Any Self Inflicted Scars?: | kinda |
Does Pain Turn You On?: | let me check... yes |
Do You Stand For Originality And/Or Creativity?: | definitely |
What Do You Like Most About Life?: | beauty |
What Do You Dislike Most About Life?: | mankind |
Have You Ever Pierced A Body Part Yourself?: | not technicaly |
Have You Ever Hd To Beg For Dinner Money?: | no |
Do You Own A Car?: | yes |
Have You Ever Been To Jail, Yet?: | no, I'm anonymous in the crimes I've committed |
Do You Have Actual Scars From Hardcore Shows?: | nah |
Have You Ever Had To Vomit While Making Out?: | no, and I hope I never do |
Have You Ever Held A Job For Less Than A Day?: | no |
Have You Ever Felt You Had To Fuck Stuff Up For No Good Reason?: | had to, no. done it anyway, yes |
Have You Ever Been Kicked Out Of Your Parents House?: | no, until a little over a year ago I paid all the bills |
Have You Ever Been Fired From Your Job Because Of Your Attitude?: | no |
Have You Ever Been Fired From A Job On Your Off Day?: | nope |
What Is Your Sexual Orientation?: | straight but a little curious |
What Is Your Occupation?: | umm, cashier/pizza maker |
Does The World Piss You Off?: | from time to time |
If You Were A Seriel Killer Who Would You Be?: | me as a serial killer, which I don't see happening |
If You Were To Kill Someone How Would You Do It?: | depends |
What Would You Do With The Body?: | feed it to hogs at a confinement, they'll eat it bones and all |
If You Were Gonna Commit Suicide How Would You Do It?: | I wouldn't |
What Is Your Ultimate Goal In Life?: | hmm, do you have to have an "ultimate" goal? |
If You Had A Chance To Meet Anyone You Want Alive Or Dead Who Would It Be?: | |
Do You Have Any Tattoos And/Or Piercings?: | 1 tattoo and 1 piercing so far |
What Is Your Favorite TV Show?: | I don't know anymore |
What Is Your Favorite Book?: | hmm, there are several |
Do You Smoke?: | once in a while, pipe tobacco cigars |
Do You Drink?: | I haven't yet |
Do You Use Illegal Drugs?: | I haven't yet |
Do You Party Alot?: | I don't like preps and this is prepsville, take a guess |
Did You Graduate High School?: | yes, early |
Do You Have A Nickname?: | a few |
Take this survey | Find more surveys | MySpace Surveys Bzoink - The Original Survey Site |
I just got some wonderful news!!! I don't need a passport which means we won't have to wait 13 weeks, YAY!!!
I've never needed anything or anyone so badly as I do now. I think I'm going to cry. What do I do? What can I do?
I'm so lost in my own thoughts and needs I can't even hold a decent conversation for long. I hate it when I'm like this.
I'm soooo bored! Not necessarily just now, but in general. As previously stated, Iowa is dull! It makes me so frustrated, and being really horny isn't helping!
I don't have any idea why, but my stress levels are up. I decided to tes my blood pressure at the pharmacy section of Wal-Mart and it was just a little high which is unusual for me. I've also been clenching my jaw alot as a result and it hurts. What's the deal?
Por que? Que esta la problema? Necesito usted. Esta es muy espcial y importante. Abra los ojos. Comparta su sufrimiento. No comprende por que. Por favor, revela esta a me. Que no desea mas?
I felt lost today for some reason, couldn't really pin point why. My mind kept running circles trying to nail it. I don't know. I seemed really different today, almost like I wasn't me, or that's the way I saw it. I kept thinking things I wouldn't normally think, and I felt like just walking out of work for no reason. I don't know what the deal is, wonder if it is connected to last night? *sighs* I don't know. I still feel lost.
I don't know what this is, but it feels really fucking good. At about 9:30 I decided to go for a walk and got back about midnight. I was listening to my music and singing (even though I'm constantly told I don't sing well). The more I walked, the more I wanted to walk. I started really getting into the music. I don't know what came over me, but it was like something snapped. I feel powerful, invincible, unstoppable, and limitless. I don't know why or if it's connected, but I felt like walking off into the night, I didn't want to stop. Whatever this is it has had a profound effect.
I'm already tired of a job I've only had for about 3 weeks. I'm not sure if I should witch or wait a while longer. I think a big part of it is that I'm restless here. Combine that with the bore and annoying co-workers and ther ya go.
My birthday is friday. I haven't celebrated a birthday since I was 13. They have become somewhat meaningless to me overtime. This year I'll be turning 20, that's two decades I've been alive. That just seems like a landmark to me for some reason. I have worked my last seven birthdays, but by coincidence I have this friday off. For the first time in several years I am actually happy to be alive, so I think that I'm going to celebrate this one!
I just wonder, why do you hardly ever see a girl wear a dress, full skirt, or a nice pair of jeans? Most seem to wear mini-skirts or raggedy/loose fitting jeans. Don't get me wrong, I'm a guy of course I like mini-skirts, I'm just saying it would be nice to see a girl wear a pair of Levi's more often. Most girls who look good in a mini-skirt look drop-dead gorgeous in a dress, I'm not saying it/they have to be all girly girl. For example: a girl came into my store today wearing a full black dress, she had her nose; eyebrow; lip; and five spots on her ears pirced, she had tattoos, and she stunning in the dress. Mini-skirts can be good, but in this case there is such a thing as too much of a good thing.
ok, if you think you want the answer you can ask.
Hey, you can't ask me about this one, you know who you are. Sorry.
I feel so happy and good, yet I'm frustrated. I don't blame anyone, but I can't help this feeling. Everytime, I feel this way because of this I feel a little gulty too. *sighs* maybe in time.
YAY!! How can something so simple mean so much? I feel so much better now.
It was waiting for me all day, just waiting for me to come home. The stress and frustration of the day had helped make it strong. At first it was held off by hope, but that hope was lost. In that moment it came crushing down on me like 5 tons of bricks. *sighs desolately*
Lord I hate when I get like this! It drives me nuts. I feel the urge to write but I can't settle my thoughts enough. Everytime I start a poem I get two lines in and can't finish, if I try to write a story I have the same problem or it gets a little incoherent. *sighs*
Something I have to say, and this amuses me a little. Ok people, if you go into a store to buy alcohol and/or tobacco, unless the clerk asks to see your id they don't feel it's necessary. If you think that they should have then you either don't look as young as you think or they are a good judge of age. Don't hand it to them unless they ask because I can tell you first hand that they don't care if they don't ask.
Not feeling so well today, my head hurts from sinus pressure. I need to take some medicine but... It doesn't help that I'm feeling a little stressed for some unknown reason. Despite this, I feel happy and ready to take on what comes my way. Strange isn't it? I feel like going for a road trip! *looks in wallet* Wait, I take that back.
Today when a customer came into my store she brought her 3 kids in with her, I'll come right out and say they were being brats. She and I got into a discussion about unruly kids. I told her about my nephew, he has a tendency to wonder off in stores and misbehave. I've got him to the point where all I have to do now is firmly say "Sean, two inch rule!" and he won't move more than a couple inches from my side, what's interesting is that it doesn't work for either parent and they end up having to spank him. When I told her that she laughed and said "I doubt that would work on my kids, but you can go for it if you want." All I did is look at them and say with a firm and slightly raised voice "Hey kids, your mother asked you to go to the car sit and behave, now do it." She and I both watched in awe as all three of them quieted down and went to the car.
How do I do it? I know I'm not that intimidating to children, I have yet to actually meet one who didn't like me. So what is it?
Oh lord after last night and today... I am sore and I'm not sure how much more I can take! The need is so stong I can't believe it! Oh but it is so worth it.
After lastnight I had Some interesting dreams. They I thought they were real. Reality hit when Ilooked over and I was by myself. I almost cried from the pain that caused. Something must change.
I am protective of those I care about, it is my nature and my desire to safeguard them and be there for them. I have run over two miles to help a friend in need before, and I can't even run a whole mile. When I can't drop everything and be there, my concern for them is even stronger. How can I not worry when you are there and I am here?
*sighs* For a little over a 1 1/2 years I've been sub-renting from my father, since I was only actually paying for one room it was really cheap. Now, unfortunately, I'll have to start paying more. Recently my dad's gf had to leave work due to clots in her legs, the doctor gave her a conditional work release that her work said they couldn't do. She filed for unemployment and was originally approved, then because of an error by her boss they revoked the approval. In order for us not to get evicted I'm actually going to have to pay full rent, it's still not expensive, but...
Looks like I might have to get a temporary part-time job until everything clears up. *sighs* Things aren't going the way I need them to. Oh well, I can make things work like I always have. Well, I think it's time for me to go to bed, I'm unusually tired and I can't sleep in tomorrow.
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