The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

How can you tell your too drunk to drive?



When you swerve to miss a tree, then realize it was just your air freshner.





Why do women wear panties?



State Law requires all manholes to be covered when not in use.





A boy goes to a Strip Club, and his mom gets angry and ask him, "Did you see anything there you were not suppose to see?"



Boy answers, " Yep I saw Dad."



Hope you got a laugh....

~oxidisingangel

o - observant

x - xenophobian

i - independent

d - dependable

i - intelligent

s - submissive

i - idyllic

n - nocturnal

g - gracious

a - accomplished

n - necromancer

g - gentle

e - educated

l - loyal



~oxidisingangel

Ever Wonder.....



Why the sun lightens your hair, but darkens our skin?



Why you don't ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?



Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?



Why is the man who invest all your money is called a broker?



Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?



Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?



Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?



Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?



If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?



You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole airplane out of that stuff?



Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?



Why can't women put on there mascara with their mouth closed?



Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?