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I closed my eyes,

opened them back up,

and you had slipped away.

There was no last goodbye,

no final hug to hold in my memory.

I didn't get to say all the words

that now refuse to flow,

forever trapped behind the tears

that I cannot control.

Never got to tell you

how much you meant to me,

or let you know

all the things that made me feel

that our link would never break.

Now that link is broken

and I am so lost.

My world spins so fast around me,

that I cannot see at all.

All the thoughts mix in my mind,

refusing to make any sense.

I feel like I am burning inside

by flames I can never put out.

It hurts more then I can handle

and I feel myself fade.

I cannot exist with so much pain

so I lock myself away.

I refuse to feel the hurt

and I hurt so I can feel.

I erase my life from my mind,

slip away from the world,

hide inside my empty shell,

and pretend that I am real.

This world has turned black

and I feel it try to suck me in.

It wants to take me back

into the big abyss.

I fight to resist the pull,

to keep myself here,

but I am so tired of fighting,

so tired of holding on,

so tired of grasping on

to the thin threads of humanity

that are leaking in my veins.

How could you leave me here?

You changed the plot and did not tell me

and I have lost the script.

I stand alone here waiting

for you to sing your part

with silence as my only companion.

The show has ended

and you have walked off stage

while I remain waiting in the wings

for you to return to me.



Tanya Costa

10/15/07