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I'm curious about the consensus amongst vampires where Donors lie in all this.

I've gotten a few messages asking me to give out my number (not gonna anytime soon) and that I should get in contact if I want to be turned. I don't think one can be turned into a vampire. You're born one and you may or may not awaken.

(Wake me up inside!
Call my name and save me from the dark
Bid my blood to run!
Before I come undone
Save me from the nothing I've become!)

How do you as members of the vampire community really feel about Donors?

Are we a food source? Are we akin to a plate of food? Are we cattle? Are we equals to those we give to? How should a Donor be treated in your opinions and experiences? I would like to hear your thoughts and feelings on this. It will help me know what to look for.

Hello, everyone!

Just your friendly neighborhood blood donor here. I wanted to wish everyone who celebrates it a Happy Thanksgiving. I cooked a lot of stuff ahead so all I'd have to do is throw it together in the oven and it'll be done.

I'm doing better with eating more regularly. I've started to feel fuller after smaller meals but there have been days where I don't eat and barely drink enough. I just don't feel like eating when I feel so down. It makes me nauseous and I hate wasting food. I lost seven pounds from my last weigh in like that but it isn't very healthy. I did better yesterday and the day before. I managed to eat and keep it down.

Today I'm making bacon wrapped hot dogs. I've also been reading more Awakening stories and I've noticed there's a recurrence of GI issues and issues ingesting citrus and odd sleeping patterns.

I have a friend who went through a traumatic experience and it was like he changed overnight. He stopped sleeping and it's been years since the incident and the lack of sleep is taking it's toll. He also developed a serious issue with anything that contains citrus {even fruit} and anything remotely spicy {all the way to pepper and paprika} when none of these issues were there before. I think it's the lack of sleep that keeps his body from healing itself. I'm worried about him.

What's really strange is that his story has a lot in common with a lot of the common denominators of a typical awakening story. I told him I was on a 'vampire site' and joked that he has a lot in common with these 'vampire types' and that he may be one. I said this as a joke. But... I'm starting to wonder.

He's even brought it up himself saying he'd be the worst vampire ever because of how much he likes garlic, can't sleep once the sun hits his eyes, blah blah blah. Well, plenty of living vampires like garlic and have bad sleeping schedules. I even said he'd probably feel a lot better if he fed. We both got quiet and started talking about something else.

So, I wonder. Is my bestie a vampire? Or does he really need to get though his insomnia and get some rest and a good moisturizer? I think I'll get him something easy since he moved so I'm not around to play with his face like I used to. I wonder if he'll use a mask if it comes in really manly scents or funny names. Bacon wrapped facial wrap, anyone?

So, I joined Vampire Rave a few weeks ago. I have actually been on my donor journey for years. I've had no luck. Some people were really creepy. I felt like they were "thirsty" not thirsty. One was a sexual offender {definitely} and some just screamed "STRANGER DANGER". I have yet to meet a vampire, all of the ones I met were male, who wasn't overly dramatic thinking I'd be all into some Anne Rice copycat or Twilight shenanigans. Or that I would put up with cryptic language, vague or no answers, and that general overly spooky vibe they were trying to put out. Something in me said it wasn't right and I shouldn't trust them. Especially when someone said they don't like sharing their food and that I could only donate to them and would have to be bonded to them. That didn't sit well with me. Who says I'm going to fall in love and that donors always do or that I have to join their coven and be bonded with them?

Shouldn't I be allowed to simply donate energy to someone who needs it after I get to know them and feel safe with them? I mean, I'm not looking for a sugar vamp or payment. Then again, dinner might be nice. I am kinda poor. I even played with the idea for the past couple of days to put out an advertisement along the lines "Will donate energy to vampire who will edit my audio."

I'm working on a youtube channel right now. I used to read to my dad since he went blind and we both loved spooky stories and true crime. We watched a lot of TV and movies and at some point we felt like we had seen them all so discovering youtube was a great blessing. I wouldn't have to read until I was hoarse but I still loved reading to him. He passed away. He was my main priority since I was a teen. I took care of him instead of living a typical life. I'm sad that he's gone. It hurts every day. But reading those stories makes me happy. I just wish I could fix the audio.

I got that system message from Cancer like everyone else. I sent a message to the film maker and still haven't gotten a reply. I offered to talk about what makes someone want to be a donor. I've always donated blood. I volunteered a lot. So, it makes sense that I want to give what I have to someone who is in need. I saw a few documentaries that talked about Black Swans.

Isn't Black Swan such a beautiful name to give to donors? I was instantly drawn into the idea of being a donor to a vampire. I read books with more scientific and historical approaches to the Modern, Living Vampire and Strigoi Vii. The more I learned, the more I wanted. I just haven't met the right vampires.

I've been of poorer health since my dad died. I'm trying to eat better and I've lost weight without trying but that's mostly from just not feeling hungry. I know as a hopeful future donor I need to take care of myself better or I won't be able to donate at all.

For a while, I was talking to a psychic vampire who said feeding was like feeding on the rich emotions of the donor and that sorrow had its own taste. I liked what he was telling me, that part at least, because I would be emotionally drained and numb for a while. I was so sad any reprieve would be welcome. But other things he said were a red flag.

I'm putting this out there because I am a real person with real feelings. I'm not a sack of blood or a plate of food. I'm vulnerable and that's okay. This might be the right time for me to meet the right vampire or vampires to donate to. I also have the time to give to others that I didn't before. I miss my dad. But when one door closes, another opens.

So, I'm willing to talk and chat. To get to know people. Have a good time. Make friends. I'll try to make my journal weekly and I set up alarms for when I get messages.