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i'm losing control of my life. How come now I discover that sex might kill me, women are starting to take an interest in me?



i have two admirers at my local pub, and several internet friends who have decided they want to meet me in real life. technically, i'm still single and unattached, but i've got a feeling several females consider me "their property"



i even have an internet stalker who wont tell me a thing about herself, but seems determined to move to the UK and marry me. she found me through VR, but apart from her location and gender, there is nothing in her profile.

found this on another site. we dont have walmarts in England, but i wish we did, then i could try all these.



16 things to do at walmart this is so funny ima try it





Body:



1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they

aren't looking.



2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.



3. Make a trail of pinapple juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.



4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,

" 'Code 3' in housewares".... and see what happens.



5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.



6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.



7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite

them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.



8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask,

"Why can't you people just leave me alone?"



9. Look right into the security camera; & use it as a mirror, and pick your

nose.



10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows

where the anti - depressants are.



11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible"

theme.



12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size

funnels.



13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through,

say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"



14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position

and scream..

"NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!"



15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell,

very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!



16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "go, pikachu,

go!"



Repost this if you laughed...

Or are planning to do any of these things