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and on Saturday night, yet another friend tried to commit suicide. maybe i just attract unhappy people. spent a few hours talking and i think i've caught her from falling again. i'm so tired though.

okay, now just as i thought things cant get much worse - guess what?



There's a rather nice girl i met in a Vampire roleplay game (don't laugh - it's fun) who i thought was quite serious about me, and i became very fond of her. eventually, i grew to respect her so much, i thought it only fair to tell her about my crap heart. she got kinda upset at it, and shortly after that, she disappeared. maybe for the best, i thought - but then found i really missed her, and wanted her back. last week she sent a pm whilst i was away from the keyboard, and b the time i got back she was gone. every night i haunted the site looking for her (literally haunted - my character is a ghost) and i was on the verge of giving up, drawing the conclusion that she didnt want to see me anymore. sob sob.



only that wasnt it. one of her friends got through to me last night with difficult news to break. my cyberlover and most of her friends were in a bad car crash, and had been in a coma for several days. i felt like i'd been hit in the chest with a sledgehammer.



things are beginning to look up though - shes on the road to recovery, and briefly woke up lthis morning. unfortunately, three of her friends are still very poorly. I'm beginning to think this week was cursed.

Damn - she doesnt live in America either. are there any heroic Mounties reading this?

here i am beginning a journal in a new site! exciting.



okay - firstly, i'm all depressed coz someone i thought really cool commited suicide before i got to know her. .. i read her journal, and found her poem about slashing her wrists and the abuse at the hands of her father to be sad and moving. i really meant to try to talk to her - i did. my blood ran cold when we got the message from her little sister that she had actually gone ahead and done it.



and now i'm angry, coz a girl i roleplay with is in the same situation. i guessed what was happening and confronted her - and she told me everything. i want to kill the evil bastard who is abusing her - but here i am stuck on the wrong side of the Atlantic - helpless and impotent as he gets away with his crimes.



life sucks. any viscious sadist in America feel like dishing out some justice for me? got a job for ya.