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The fall
04:08 Aug 28 2010
Times Read: 503






Life is a bottomless pit, you feel yourself falling getting lower, slower, older, duller. atrophy and entropy closing in engulfing your Very soul that once was so vibrant and clear . Surpassing Fallen angels and the decrepit rising dead, u wonder can my life get lower the this, you continue your plunge. Life is pain they tell you, only in being numb do we find our end. You crave this pain, for to hurt is to feel, to feel is to live, to live is to love, so through this pain we continue to fall,

Welcome my complacent friend to the human endeavor, for the truth is we search out pain, ,the sickness, as it is sometime called,it is as a real and beautiful as the blood coursing through are veins. And as the warmth and glow you are born into this world begin to fade, as u become colder, bolder, greener, meaner, u feel yourself getting closer to the numbness, the, beautiful quiet serenity that is death.

A newborn baby cries, we give it love, when that same man dies, we cry for him, well not really for him, for us, as almost to laugh in deaths face. For the fallen don't cry, For in their celestial slumber, the pain is gone , OUR bladed bloody tears are a Selfish act, to take a stab at death, to say "FUCK you im still here" death simply responds with a grim grin as to respond"everyone meet their maker, Ill be seeing you soon"



So with that we continue our heavenly fall into the ground headed torward the sky. then if but for just one moment our over-indulgent under-diluted sense of self which is so often occupied by delusions of grandeur, takes but a brief moment to contemplate these simple yet, oft overlooked facts, who was I, Who am I, what have I done, was i moral, was i just, did I love, was i loved, did I Live, and finally why is my body not leaving this tomb?, then in that final glorious moment you get your face to face with the reaper and he answer you u with that same grim grin , as if to say "it is too late, now you are already dead"

Brokenhearted
04:05 Aug 28 2010
Times Read: 504

(work in progress)

Alas I lay here Brokenhearted

A once planed flight never departed

Our wingspan spread to take the air

So I lay here and wonder why

We chose the turbulent ground

and not an ambient sky

Our trip was conjured with great intentions

It was only the details we did not mention

things like gravity don't matter in a dream

Then we faced a harsh reality

not all wings are made for flight

It's easy to be blinded by the beauty of day

and deafened by the torturous silence of night

So now I lay here all alone

A once proud Phoneix, now feeble on my kness

only shell of a former Stature I used to be

Why give a man wings If he was never met to fly

To let him taste what he thought sweet freedom

only a thin cream frosting on a cake of dirt

forged by sadness

then baked with regret

Did you do this so I may learn

This world is not perfect

not like our dreams

so That if ever again We choose to fly

I will abide by the rules of land

and the laws of the sky

The next course we plot will end better

I will plan for now, the present that is

time is to precious to wait for forever

I know this future flight is not a guarantee

Which is why I lay here brokenhearted

Will You come back to me?

mirror me
04:02 Aug 28 2010
Times Read: 505

(work in progress)





Mirror me first thing i see

upon morning wake i stare at thee

flaws and imperfections appear rapidly

a torrid reflection of a 25 years past

the burning from rage neatly hidden under

a dimpled smile guarded by lock and key



mirror me you cant fool me

others see wit, charm, humor and beauty

I see a scared little boy desprately hiding

who fears to abide my adultly responsibilities

life is still a game, i tell them all, close there eyes and count to three

i found the perfect spot, it's a dark damp place called complacency ,

the happy people never go in there, and even if they do ill convince them

with all my clever guile , they have the wrong man,

after all im just a small child, another lost soul,

demand i recieve a pardon,

and fall back to my latent self-destructive tendencies,

they thought for sure this time they caught me,

I was always the one in control



MIrror me at night i look once more

what in the morning were imperfection,s are now gross misconceptions

perhaps simply, plight of my own delirium

despite many prayers left unanswered to discover my tabula rosa

this is my reality , there will be no redux,my past mistakes already written



SO with that each morning i recive the precious breath of life,

Im once faced again with mirror me, put on my biggest smile



go out and fake my day, just so i can fade once more into the night,



so i may die inside once more



OHdear god i crave that eery feeling,



mirror me i find u so appealing

Broken
03:59 Aug 28 2010
Times Read: 506

Broken

BLED OUT

NO MORE TEARS

scar tissue all thats left

residual callusing of 25 years

constantly searching exceptional ways

to fake it through just one more day

suffering is true solstice

no longer hungry for life

finding fullness from the cannibalism occuring from inside

scaveging all remnants of false hope left behind

and to those of you out there still trying to keep warm

tread carefully on thin ice its prone to shatter,

natural law tells us were meant to become cold and useless

it is preordained into the verry essence that is matter

alway be good to those around with a smile on their face

you dont want to be the one to clean up all that mess

I prefer a glass half empty, a glass half full creates quite a splatter