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Hey ppl,

On this f*cked up day i am feeling more alone then ever for some odd reason. Sure , lots of people are talking to me online and on VR. I don't know why i feel like this when i should be happy that people are finaly not judging me for who i am anymore, or rather, how i look. I posted stuff on a forum about cutting, because i was very unsure wether it was right or wrong, some people gave great advice and others just bashed cutters like myself, which really pissed me off but whatever i can careless now, we are all entitled to have our opinions and i asked for it anyways. I am all alone tonight in this cold and cruel place we call the world. I am humain like everyone and have needs, but i wish i didn't. Well i don't know what else to say except for the fact that i am in the middle of changing and i am not quite sure if this is a good thing or a bad, but like i said whatever i can careless. These are my thoughts today.

Today there is one thing particularly on my mind... fears.. everyone has at least one that they know of... others think they dont have any... that they are all tough and shit... well i have a fear and i am not afraid to admit it... my fear is too be alone on the streets... not alone at night .... thats not what i mean by that... what i mean is the fact of living on the streets... not having a place to call home... not having a family because they either abandoned you or kicked you out... people wonder why i don't live with my parents... well the reason for that is simple... my parents werent ready or prepared to be parents... they didnt like the responsibility and their way out was for me to get out... so dont try to tell me to go back cause that wont be happening anytime soon... they dont want me and i dont need them to survive...i've dont it once i shall do it again even if i have to face my fears again... being 16 almost 17 (at the time), female, it's not the same as a male of our age being out on the streets... alot of shit can happen more to a female then a male... i guess thats my fear... but i dont hide it... the only way to overcome your fears is to first recognize it, then to face it... i've done that... so to all those people that are reading this and saying they have no fears are full of shit... pardon me for my language but it's true... everyone has a fear wether they want to or not... anyways thats what was bothering me today... i hope it really made some of you think about things that i think about for days straight.... sometime day after day. I'm out!!!