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The Darkness in my soul grows each day. For each day that I have to live with knowing the people that I could trust stab me in the back. They say that they will never betray me say that but in stead they turn on me that is not a true friend. For every time it happen the darkness grows and knowing it is growing well for one it will want out sometime sooner or later. But there's a part of me that doesn't want it to come out. Being torn apart by both parts seems to always happen to me. Is it because I trust people to easily or it because I am different and not like everyone else that lives in the perfect world of fashion and love, happiness, caring for others, is it that because I don’t live my life like that but always in the dark prowling looking for another victim to bring into my world of pain and hurt souls that I rome with. Known as the one’s in the shadows. I do ask myself why doe’s this darkness grows in my heart. Why must this darkness in my heart have to hurt so much? I feel the pain that always comes with the darkness in my heart. I mostly just lay there in the darkness waiting, wanting out but yet at the sometime’s I want to be in the darkness. Normally I love to be in the darkness but this darkness that I am in I don’t want to be in because of the pain it cause me. The hurt, pain, the sadness and all I want is out. Sometimes I wonder why do, I let myself get pulled into this why I may know and yet I may not really know why. Is it that I am weak mined or is it that I just long to be accepted by the people that hate me for no reason but even throw I have always bin a cast out in my hole life I still want to know..........WHY?

The grass is green

the flowers are pure

the trees are gentle

and the people are silent



My tears fall slowly

like silent raindrops

watering my precious earth

I raise my eyes to the stone



The evil stone, the stone of pain

towers over my green grass

the evil stone, the evil stone

with nothing but a name



The evil stone receives my tears

hears my sobs

hears me wail

for my son is whom you tower



The pure flowers comfort me not

O tragic day is this

my son, my son, my only son

is taken from me



I hug only earth

I kiss only grass

my son is gone now

he belongs to the ground



O what evil tortures

have rained upon me

the evil stone, the pure flowers

they pay now my respect



my son, my son, my only son

is gone from me now

I shall never see his smiling face

or hug him so gently



What misery is this?

the rain now pours

soaking me through

chilling me outside and in



the grass is green

the flowers are pure

the trees are gentle

but the people are not silent



Now they cry

now they cry the useless tears

they cry now, they cry still

but I cry too



The sky cries behind a veil of gray

the people cry behind somber faces

I myself cry behind the evil stone

and onto the green grass

the silence here is defening

Just the sound of the pages turning

and the pencil moving

Teardrops stain this page

i write on here tonite

Stain it because of a love

that was lost and is now out of sight

The silence is so strong

I scream but no one hears me

I'm drowning in myself

someone pull me out

suddenly a hand

plunged down toward me

too far away i can't reach it

the darkness hides it as i sink

farther into the depths of my tortured soul.

The silence now is stronger than ever

fighting for the surface

I fall to the bottom

the silence tears me apart

hate drowns me

i am gone.

Insistent sadness surrounds my fractured heart

like a fountain among flowers and trees

it runs, always filled by something

running over and feeding what lives near by

the birds taking there drink then fluttering away

nothing ever staying for long

a lonely grove of subtle inspiration

a sheltered place with a ray of sun shine

a bit of hope in a dreary harmony

a wish for a Gardner to tend its rustic beauty

a thought of a caring hand to help

a belief of something worth more

a shady place to rest ones self

In a grove of sunny sorrows.

When rain turns to blood rain you know that someone died for you because they car about you. When blood runs down your arm someone will be there to clean it up for you someone how cares deeply for you. When feeling pain they are there for you to help make the pain go away. But when at that moment when you need them the most and they are not there. Yet when the rain changes from water to blood then you know that even if there not there in person they are still there for you. When it rains blood but the sky is black your heart is not it is the color of what you feel at that moment and for ever. Thats when the rain of blood fall from the sky.....