The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

My life,

Is a waterfall,

Managing to look graceful,

While constantly falling



My life,

Is a tree in spring,

Beautiful,

Hiding behind leaves



My life,

Is a history book,

Full of interesting details,

No one wants to read



My life,

Is a scientist,

Talking words of wisdom,

We can’t understand



My life,

Is a diary,

Absorbing thoughts,

That will never be spoken



My life,

Is this poem,

Filled with hidden meanings,

That are much more than a metaphor

Your fading smile,

And bright blue eyes,

The too short life,

And the media's lies,



Your once bubbling voice,

And the words I'll never find,

The memories remain,

Tugging in our minds,



I only saw the wreckage,

As it flashed upon the news,

Saw the many letters,

Invaded by TV crews,



I didn't know you very well,

But there's something I must ask,

I may not hear your answer,

But these questions aren't the last



The movie you'd just seen,

The people you were with,

The song that you did hear,

The comments you did give,



If you could take it back,

Maybe start again,

Would these be your last?

If you had it, once again?

You left me your artwork,

And your endless list of cd's,

But you forgot to take your hat,

And forgot to take your keys



You left me family video's,

Your young face smiling bright,

But you forgot to take your shoes,

And the talks late at night



You left me your favourite T-shirt,

The one that doesn't fit,

But you forgot to take your jumper,

The one your grandma knit,



You left me with endless questions,

Which may leave me over time,

But you forgot to take the memories,

Your warm hands wrapped in mine



Just don't forget we loved you,

And don't forget me please,

'Cause when you reach the gates of heaven,

I'll be praying on my knee's

You want to be an actor?

Were you drawn by the bright lights?

The fame?

Or something more carnal?

More sinister?

Be prepared, child,

For they will lock you up,

These directors and scriptwriters of the world,

They will place you into their box,

Its walls may not be visible,

And you may forget it’s there,

But it will surround you,

Strip you,

Leave you alone with no contact with reality,

It is a box of false memories,

As your past will be edited,

Painted over with a shiny glaze,

So as to appeal to the rest of the world,

You will be given new dreams and goals,

You will be stripped naked,

And adorned as you never thought possible,

You will be like me,

Ducking and weaving,

Suddenly afraid of the large black lenses,

That steal your soul,

Afraid that you will be given new stereotype,

Or worse,

That your current one will be enhanced,

You will never be good enough,

You will be dubbed too short,

Too tall,

Too blonde,

Too…wrong,

With each new job be prepared,

For a foul breath to streak across your body,

Whispering promises of stardom,

You will live off cheap drugs,

And expensive alcohol,

Living in a mansion,

Surrounded by beautiful gardens,

Or will you?

This house will be shown in magazine,

Attached to your name,

But it’s a house you’ve never seen,

And no one can locate,

Your mind will be numbed,

And paranoia will dominate you,

Your face will appear on a T.V.

That lies next to an old mattress,

In a dirty room,

And you will not feel proud, as expected,

But rather feel violated,

You will focus on every blemish,

Every wrongly positioned hair,

Every wrong move,

You will live with a constant fear,

That this job you’re watching,

Will be your last,

Soon, child,

The world will know your name,

But you yourself,

Will not recognize who you are,

You are now but a young girl,

The rest of your life will be spent in isolation,

A life of degradation,

A life of pain,

A life of anger,

Your signature on a contract,

Signals your consent to be their pawn,

You will not know who you are,

But no one will care,

Now,

Smile, look to the left, and pose.

In the cool night it glistens,

The blade so cool and calm,

As steadily it hovers,

Over the scar-marked arm,



Slowly it advances,

Toward the naked flesh,

To end a life of misery,

To save this nervous wreck,



They'll never know they did it,

They may not even care,

About her slow and taunting pain,

They never knew was there,



They slowly wore away,

Her spirit for this life,

Instead they replaced it,

With endless torment and strife,



They threw the sticks,

And threw the stones,

And as their mothers warned,

Each would break her bones,



But they never warned of words,

Which stung just so much more,

Never cried the warning,

That left her so unsure



Now the tale ever clearer,

It's swimming in her head,

As the blade cuts ever deeper,

She lays down on her bed,



In the morning they found her,

Her body too pale and cold,

And at the funeral they remembered her,

But the storie's left untold,



They still don't know why she did it,

This once bright and happy girl,

Don't know why she felt the need,

To leave this dark cruel world