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up at the crack of dawn... not on purpose, feels like christmas.... today i get the surgery.... haven't been this excited about anything in a long time.... did i say that already? just goes to prove i really really am....., well that happenes right after work tonite, i'll be sedated when i get home, so i wont b online, i'll get on as soon as i can see, wish me luck

well, i'm going to see "wicked" in newyork, its a birthday christmas present for my mom, thats on 1/12

just got to find a babysitter for the foster kids. cant depend on kathleen, she almost majorly fucked up my sisters plans to surprise my mom, she said she would watch the kids onsunday so reen could take me and my mom out and then yesturday blew up at reen and said she wouldn't do shit for her, so reen Kissed ass till she said she would watch the kids agian, i am not kissing that bitches ass and $700 worth of ticketts + $200 transportation is not gonna go down the drain because she's having a bad day and wants to take it out on me.



2 days till d-day!

oh and i lost 4lbs last week on weight watchers, i'm so proud of me!



guess thats all

hope everyone had a good thanksgiving.



just about done christmas shopping....

eye surgery on friday...

signed up on ebay! lol

got back on weight watchers

appying for a second job at a restaurant as server (need extra cash)





just taking it one time

guess thats all

i ask for a boyfriend and i get 3 freaks

i rarely scream, i'm bitchy, i yell, but rarely all out top of your lungs scream. thats what i got to wake up today, kathleen bitching about my mother and i couldn't take it anymore (here she is liveing in my moms house complaining about her) i just started screaming at her, now in the past when she lived with us i never said a damn thing, when she started screaming i would ingore her or get upset and go to my room, but i'm at my wits end. i just want her to leave. amazingly i think i actually won the argeument, though i'm not sure b/c win or lose the arguement i still lose cause shes still liveing here......

god forbid i ever actually need $$ from my father cause he always says no. he owes me more then he could ever afford to repay and he wont even help me out. i had the consultation for the laser eye surgery and set an appt to do it on the 30th, its going to cost $4500.



i'm just in a pissy mood, he refuses to help, the people in my house are to fucking loud and when i leave messages for people to call me they don't! GGGGGGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRR



WISH CARMEN COULKD PICK ME UP NOW



just want to escape

why, why do i even try to hope that they will ever leave? the deal with this house ,like all the others, fell through.... thier not going anywhere, from what i understand kathleen is finally c-ing how unrelyable clayton is and is getting a job herself, but only time will tell if she actually gets one.....



work went well.... i asked my boss if i could make the birthday cake (we have a birthday dinner once a month for the residents) next birthday dinner, he told me to bring in pictures of some of my work and when i showed him the cakes he was very impressed so i just have to show one other boss, but its looking good.



christmas is only 4 checks away so i have to start shopping, i pray everyday that the foster kids will go home for christmas, hopefully theres some tv special left in the world,



Happy halloween to all