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I lay awake, questions swirling about my head.



And we all know what rocky pillows those make.

I had intra-lasik surgery on both of my eyes about 2 weeks ago. I had read all of the articles about the high success rate and warnings about possible consequences, weighed the risks, and took a chance. OK, not much of a chance, because the success rate is somewhere around 99.84%.



Anyway, so far my surgery is a success, even though my recovery is slower than most patients’. One of the potential consequences listed and documented is “loss of vision”, which means either worse eyesight or actual blindness. Since I didn’t have anything else to do the other evening, I decided to see what it would have been like to lose my eyesight. Could I function in the house that I had lived in for the last 7-1/2 years, and thought I knew fairly well?



I wanted to make sure that I didn’t cheat (as I am wont to do), so I got out my first aid kit and retrieved the adhesive tape, and proceeded to tape my eyelids shut. I intended to spend the next 4 hours without the use of my eyes. I learned several very important lessons in the 35 minutes I participated in this experiment:



1. I don’t know my house nearly as well as I thought. Doorways were narrower, stair landings were shorter, and furniture and walls weren’t where I thought I had left them.

2. There seems to be a connection between peripheral vision and subconscious motor-skills that prevent one from accidentally stepping on dogs that lie in the middle of the floor or in doorways for no particular reason. I own four dogs. In a surprisingly short period of time I believe that I accidentally stepped on nine different dogs in my house.

3. The bottom leading edge of the countertops in the kitchen are surprisingly sharp. After kneeling to comfort a dog that I had accidentally stepped on I attempted to stand up. I didn’t realize I was that close to the counter. When I stood up my shoulder was under the edge. When my shoulder hit the underside on the counter I came to a complete stop, although my legs had not stopped pushing. The pain was unbelievable. I thought I had severed my arm.

4. Adhesive tape takes eyelashes clean off.



My eyesight continues to improve. I also discovered am not strong enough or disciplined enough to survive without my eyesight. My intention of trying it out for an entire evening ended after 35 minutes. I thought I had made it at least an hour.

COMMENTS

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Requiem
00:48 Jul 26 2011

Oh gods ... I damn near aspirated celery AGAIN.





Hahahahaha Oh, wow, those poor dogs. ♥

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