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Whoa, another year down. What to do, It snuck up on me, I normally get looked over this time of year with the holidays and all, I dont mind. Gonna get good and ripped up tonight, with my buds of course, dd you know it, we will need it. Gotta get up for work the next day, so I have to try to keep my shit together so I can at least FUNCTION at work. Wish me the best, hopefully I dont fuck up too bad.

Not too bad of a shift a work, but I know what is comming. I even VOLUNTEERED to work it, no takers. But they fucking make me work the eve of. Ehh, I'm leaving early no matter what. Got plans. Fire, drinks, hopefully some friends, at least one that I know of, and that is enough. Dont really care how cold, keeps the beer good. People die everyday, that is sad, but sometimes I wonder. Just to let it all go, that is peace. Maybe I need that. No more problems, no bullshit, no feelings, no remorse, no embarrasement, that WOULD feel good...........................Don't you think?

Ok, gotta admitt, closer to "the day". No I am not an anti-christ, I just can't stand the dudes b-day. All the happy crappy stuff. Oh yeah, it is great if you have loved ones, family and what not. What if ya ain't got that stuff. What you gonna do? Sit at home and stare at a wall? Drink till you pass out? I will take the later, hopefully it will be around my friends. It is so fucking great, looking back at happier times, and getting even more depressed. Note to self, stock up on the antideppresants. I'm gonna need them. But to you all, I truly do hope you have a good one to you and yours! Rock on!

Ok, my shitty weekend is over. I get to go back to the office today. I am in a raw mood, not too much happened tonight. Borring as usual. And I got this damned holiday to contend with, which makes thing worse. I fucking abhord this shit. Everybody else is having fun and whatnot, and I am stuck in a shithole. Maybe I deserve this crap. I do not know. But that is the way it is.

I have off Tuesday and Wendsday, and both will be pegged for shopping. I cannot stand the idea of it, people get on my nerves. Not to mention I have no freaking clue what to buy people. It is silly, just tell me what you want, I am not creative enough to figure it out for myself. After all, I wanna get ya what you need, not some worthless crap you are gonna sit aroung and leer at all day. I think I am gonna get my friends together and have another bonfire christmas eve when I get out of the office. You know, roaring fire, booze, music, shooting the shit. It is better than sitting at home alone.

Ok, tonight was kinda cool, my friends came over. Not too bad but, it is what it is. Just sitting around drinking, music, and whatnot. More to follow. Stay strong, stay sucker free.

Just wanted to say hi to all my new friends in the coven. I appreciate all of you that follow my journal, I think that is really great. Please stay tuned, I much more to offer! Just give me time, I am recouperating, bad stuff done to my body, so I need time to heal. It will be back to normal soon!

I love my friends to death. That is sad to say, cause that is all I got. I like hangging out with them. So technically that is all I got, but I have fun with them. Tonight was good, just having fun, and here I am drunk again. Maybe I need this to cope. Fucking holidays suck, trust me-I will prove it.

Thought tonight would be cool, just boring. Got a decent load on, but still boring. Things just gotta get better. I hope.

What a crying freaking shame. The end of the full moon and I accomplished jack shit. Hopefully something happens tonight, but I doubt it knowing my luck. Four days of hell in the office comming up. Well, time for me to go out and get my booze on, more detailed report to follow!

Ok, alot happened tonight. I cannot go into detail. I have stuff going on in my life, then, I think I am safe comming home, and I am in a new coven. I am really happy about the second half, but I am slow so I am confused. Anyway, I need time to sort things out. I should stop drinking so much. Hello everybody anyway, whatever helps Rose.

I know it sounds corny, but what the hell, I'm not know for my wittyness. Ever do that? One (or a couple) of times with someone, and fucking bang! You are hooked. But heres the shit, you cant have em. No way, ain't gonna happen, belongs to someone else. You are fucked, no how, no way, no golden ring-fucking nothing. Now that bites. Is that what it is all about? One big tease, so close, but yet so fucking far away. A new word to my vocabulary - fucktard- I must have seen it somewhere else, and it really grew on me. Congrats to who came up with it, it fits me to a T. I do feel like a fucktard, just hanging out waiting for the shit to hit the fan. Hell, I can't even take care of myself, or anyone else for that matter. I am just taking up valuable space, just lurking in the shawdows, but hey- I'm a fucking vampire-it's my calling. Any ideas? Just let me know.