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Sometimes I cant see my own pain

something is blocking me

keeping me in vain

watching me be passed



life isn't helping me

it keeps me down

pressed against the wall

pressed against the floor

never moving the right way



fire burns through my memories

erasing me good times

and keeping the bad

I wish it would erase everything



setting me free

from my pain the keeps me behind these bars

blocking me from see the real world

instead of this fake world I wake up to



I used to be afraid of death

but now I wish it upon myself

I'm sick of standing in front of the mirror

watching myself never change



watching me feel everything

sometimes nothing



the pain from my past is blocking out everything else

I never know where I stand

I never know where I'll fall



today I have fallen

tomorrow my spirit will die

never knowing my future

I wish that I could change



I wish I was invisible

but I cant find the path to take myself there

I'm stuck with myself

I'm stuck here







………………I cant leave…………….

Fallen angels

scars from our battles

wounds that we bleed from

our wings were removed



we are left on earth

to stand for ourselves

to watch people fall

we don't have hearts

no love, no compassion

no families to love us

no true lives to share

were left to a fallen city

we have but our clothes

our feelings we have left are

tears, pain, suffering, and death

we are, what we are

and there is no going back



what do we have left?

Shadows of our old monsters

ghouls of our pasts

haunting that still linger

fire burns inside us

we have no true identities

we follow

never leading our own lives

fallen and broken

for we are stuck in the past

futures of death

shadows consume us.



FEAR IS WHAT WE FEEL



nothing else...





we are...



FALLEN ANGELS

Will it ever go away...

you tell me every single day...

no one loves me...no one even cares...

you tell me to stop crying.

My heart is torn.

And life is just too much to bare...

now when I cry there is no more pain.

But when I cry...

I cry blood and it stains...

shadow are my only friends...

hidden from this world...

on beds and broken lives.

Nothing seems happy.

Nothing seems right.



When I look in the mirror my image is distorted. The person I see is just not I. she laughs at me...she tells me to do stuff.” like cut my wrists" or just end my life. For Pete sake (?)...Its will only help me. Release the bad person in me.

I turn away. I wont listen to her...I place my hands on my ears. And close my eyes real tight...and sing slowly + quietly to myself.



"Won’t there be light. Why is there pain...when all I want to do is stop my life from going down the drain"



I can hear her in the background. She is telling me to stop. When I feel a heavy blow. My image is coming out of the mirror. She wants to be me. She says that she can want to help me.



But that’s not the image I want. As she comes out of the mirror. She breaks all the glass. She takes a jagged piece and sticks it in my ass.finally I realize pain again. Then in one quick slash. She sticks it in my head.



She stands over my body. Saying I did well...but not good enough. So it’s her turn. I watch my soul being ripped from my body. I slowly fade away...I take her place in the mirror.

...I realize this is finally my day...I am being sent to neither heaven nor hell. I didn't belong anywhere. Not even on this earth



...she slowly walks away...



.... my shadow is left with fear and disappears....

Its like fire that burns me down

Its the tunnel that makes me fear

Its the darkness that makes me close my eyes

Its the orange, red, and yellow that melts my skin

The flame that makes me shiver

The cost of life or death that you hold

The fever that makes me shake



The smell of burning flesh

The taste of my own blood

The sight of my body sprawled on the floor

Your voice telling me that you through

That your sick of me being lazy



You hate the way I make you feel

Your face its twisted

There's no going back

I moan, you yell

You pick me up by my hair



I hold out my arms scratching, punching, yelling for help

You laugh in my face telling me no one cares

You throw me into a wall

I scream in agony

You run over to me



You beat on your chest like a wild animal telling me its all my fault that, I made you the way you are

That I am useless to you

That I am nothing in your eyes

That no one cares about me



The agony stings my eyes

The fear of you clogs my mind

What have I done to deserve this scare

My pain is to much to even thing or bare

As I struggle to breath in



My breathing is shallow

My lungs feel as they are being ripped into pieces

I try to stand... the... pain continues

You run over and hit me to the ground



Telling me "I belong on the ground"

I can see blackness as I close my eyes,

My breathing has become even harder

As you continue to yell



But with my last breath

I softy whisper

" Even though everything you have done to me I will always love you"

My eyes close completely, and my body goes motionless

I still wonder



"What have I done to deserve such "ANGER"

why do i have so many feelings for you

when you cant make up your mind

one day your flirtin

the next you make me feel like shit



im lost in a tunnel

shown to many paths

and you seem to be lost on



WHO YOU ARE?



today you want to talk

but tomorrow you'll be shy

god you make me so mad

you like an annoying fly



you hing that you have feeling for me

but you dont really tell me shit

its like going through a maze

but blindfolded



ive given up

im done



and later when you ask me, what's wrong?

ill do what you have done to me



cold shoulder



nothing....





no feelings left for you