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Notes: Unfinished



I've got no one I can trust

Thrust into loneliness

No one is there for me

To be alone is to be dead to the world

Emptiness of a jar

Simply explains the nothingness in my heart

Secrets Untold

Kept inside a loathing mind

Hatred brewing in a devastated soul

You're the miracle within my hands

You're the life within my soul

All the while you keep me going

Day or night you're there for me

A piece of a puzzle to complete me

Forever a part of me

Always right for me

My essence of life within your hands

My heart caressed gently by you

Forever yours

Forever loved

When will this pain subside

Every day it seems like I die

Lost in unhappiness

The burning emotion of anger fills the cold pit of my heart

Will it ever be the same

Mindless delusion to calm the nerves

Last puff of a nasty habit

Release of love to the strength of hate

Why did it happen this way

Forever should have lasted

Given up to the alternative

It's scarce to find that always

It's not all about the sorries

Just one last drink to keep me going

One last drink so I can swallow the pain

One last drink to wash down my sorrow

Just one more

One last drink the quench my hate

One last drink is all

Only one more

One last drink to rehydrate my denial

One last drink to down my life

Just one more

That's all I ask

Just one last

Jumbled thoughts

Confusion of the mind

Empty beer bottles liter the floor

The bowl has been cashed



A weary traveler makes his way down the desolate road

Traveling on his last hope

His last toke

His last desperate attempt to find himself



A last swig of booze

All is a blur

Nothing distinctive

Nothing but darkness



The yellow line flies by

The road grows longer

The lights blind his eyes

A deafening sound ends his life

Heartaches for a lost love

Words spew hatred

Aftermath is a course for disaster

A few tears stuck behind blue eyes



Cold numbness of the limbs

Empty hearted soul searches the bottom of the bottle

Desperate thoughts of suicide

Reminiscent of the past



Shattered will cripples ambition

Struggle to stay afloat

Breaths as cold as ice

Tis internal death

Down and Out

Out of control

Control your own thoughts

Thoughts of seclusion

Seclusion of the soul

Soul of darkness

Darkness like that of the mind

Mind to distort

Distort the picture

Picture the world

World without pain

Pain without heartaches

Heartaches without love

Love closely associated with hope

Hope turns to what could be

Be that as it may

Notes: I wrote this for my creative writing teacher in high school because he always drunk a diet mt dew during class



O how it is so good

How the caffeine energizes

I hate to share it

No other carbonized drink moves me so

Ode to Mt. Dew

Death in despair

Anger in hate

Hand in Hand

Just another piece of the puzzle

Strength in weakness

Achievement in loss

Another one down

Sadness in happiness

Exceptions in rules

Does it ever end

Suffering in the best of times

Pain in pleasure

Love in grief

Happiness in death

Life in pain

We live in a circle of truth

When do you say goodbye

Is it when shit gets too hard

Do you ride it out or hope for the best

Or do you turn away from it all and never look back



Questions asked

Answers to be sought

Codes to be cracked

Lies to be woven



Is it time to say goodbye

Do you ever truly leave it all behind

or do you always hang onto a part of it

Does that make you stronger



Nothing changes

Days go bye

Wills get broken

Work goes unfinished



It is time to say goodbye

The days have past

The time has flown

You are a different person

It was not right that I had to fight

Nothing prepared me for that night

On that night I called upon Him

I asked God for might

No matter how hard I tried I could not reach that Holy Height

Even though I reached for the light

It was clearly in my sight

In my reach, only not quite

Caught in the panoramic sight

God did not help me in my time of plight

But that seemed right on this night

Notes: Unfinished



Trapped inside of this mind

Hiding from what is on the outside

The looks are oppressing

I'm not a hero

I'm only hating who I am

Feeling only non-expressive shame

I'm locked inside this cage of resentment

But that is only me

Notes: Unfinished, and it's supposed to be strange



Spreading butter over the toast

On this Wednesday morning

Starting out into the day

Wondering come what be, come what may

Dense fog

Constricts the vision

No longer is there a certain path

When the fog lifts

Only then is it clear

Morning dew under the clear blue

Only then is there song

About the future

About what's gone

About what the hell went so wrong

We have lived and lost

It all did cost

The day has come and gone

We are here waiting for a new dawn

There is nothing that I can prove

To show you just how much I love you

No Matter what I'm destined to lose

You blame it on my faults

Happiness had no chance

All I ever get are horrible insults

You gave up in advance

It did not matter how hard I fought

You kept our love as only a thought

What is this life all about

I can't see past all this hurt I've felt

I can't see past all the bullshit I've been dealt

My hearts gone cold

I'm angry I've been told

I put my fist through the wall

And I've wept with each close call

But what does this all mean

What cannot be seen

There is something hidden from sight

Something that is ready to cause a fight

What is causing

All this misery

I pack my bowl tight

Put the pipe to my lips

A flick of a lighter

A flame ignites

The shredded leaves start to burn

Hot smoke fills my lungs

Exhale

The sweet smell fills the room

A few more puffs and my mind lightens

Thoughts at ease

Warmness in my soul

At long last there is peace

The laughter finally upon my lips

I feel like shit

Feeling in a jumble

I'm ready for the prescription of my demise

Five to ten to only fuck me up

The remaining to end the pain

The empty bottle remains

Clutched so tight

My vision blurs

My mind hazes

The last thought on my mind...

She'll never love me

She's everything I dream about

We talk all day and night

But I still miss her

She's always on my mind

She is the cause of my happiness

As well as my sadness

I don't want to hurt her

I only want every thing perfect for her

The scars on her arms

The reminders of past times

I do all I can to heal the scars that cannot be seen

I'll sacrifice all I've got to give

Just to see that gorgeous smile

She's always on my mind

This one is a song



I've revisited the past in my mind



I'm willing to let it slip behind



Now is the time







I've walked a million miles for you



I've felt the way you do



I've seen things just as you do







It's time for me



To be who I'm gonna be



For me



For me



For me



Instead of you







I've encompassed my life around you



Done things that I regret



Unspeakable truth in the subconsice



Is this right?



Time and time again



I make one too many sacifices



One too many mistakes







Maybe it's time to say goodbye



Let what's hidden hide



Let old feelings slide







Farewell to it all



Find the future



Live in the present



Love what's great







Maybe it's time to say goodbye



Let what's hidden hide



Let old feelings slide



Farewell to it all



Farewell to it



Farewell



Farewell

Song/Poem



You were my answer to life

Saved my soul

Now I'm lost

Without a trace

Never to find my way back again

Too far gone for life

Just a little too late

Too far gone



Let's patch things up

Make it all better

Maybe we can find that forever

Maybe it'll work out

It's now or never



You could heal

My broken soul

Mend by shattered heart

With just eight letters

Or is it all

Just bullshit?



I'm disappearing

Away from you

Back to what I once had

Visiting the past of secrets

Looking at my darkness

Lonliness is just a word



I'm rocketing away

Showing the universe

That I'm back

To the man I once was



I will not disapper

Into the crowd

Happiness does prevail

And I am here to stay

To show you

That you had the galaxy

In the palm of your had

And lost it all



You crushed into star dust

I rebuilt it in peace

Rebuilt it to prosper

This place flies freely

Also a song written today, lemme know what you think, ideas, things to change, feedback of all sorts.



If sex is the question

And the answer is yes

I’ll put you to the test

Can you handle the pain

Do you crave the pleasure

Do you want the sensation

The test is here and I’ll show you

What you want to be shown

The love is red and so it burn

The ropes and whips

All you’ve ever dreamed

What’s your fantasy girl

I’ll show you a new side

Haunt your nightmares

It’s what I took from you

It’s what I have

Red lights and strobe lights

I wanna hear you

SCREAM

I'll call it a song, but poetry and music are basically the same, came up with this one earlier today



You’ll never know who I am

You just runaway

Don’t worry

You’ll feel my pain

I’ll fuck you up

Inside out

Insanity

Mentality of one

Paranoia

Pacify

Aggression

Run Run Run

You’re gonna get back

Tenfold is your curse

Death is your disease

Agony is the cure

I cure you baby

Want some?

Another I came up with last night



Who I am

Who I will be

Shines through in everything you cannot see

A glimpse of darkness

A shimmer of light

Just know everything is all right

Tonight the sky is black

I am abandoned by even the stars



A cloudy day shrouds my misery

The clouds move, a single beam of light escapes

I wonder who it is gracing

Not I

Not me

For I am alone

And shall I forever be

New poem I came up with off the top of my head last night



I remember the days we once had

I remember every soulful laugh

You were my goddess

My deity, a miracle from above

Every day was pure bliss

Every kiss was a blessing

Every hug was a piece of good fortune

However it was shattered in unbelievable proportion

A low ceiling can be a fear

To some it can bring tears

Shut out from love

Now there’s something to surely fear

It can shatter a heart

Erase the soul

Love can take happiness to a new height

Or when struck with plight

It may dwindle in the twilight

This is created from assorted songs and lyrics, hence the title of the poem



Lots of people talkin'

Few of them know

Communication Breakdown

Longs days for a simple man

And when Tuesday's Gone

There's a shadow on the day

Alone I break like a brick in the wall

I need somebody someone to turn the page

I will be herd

Mark My words

Prepare for war, this is now

The war ensamble is playing

Live for this

I am the beholder of justcice

Our lives being Dazed and Confused

I'll use my last resort to escape this land of confusion

We're on the edge of seventeen

Superstitions arising

Silhouettes cover the scars

Crossfire leaver me scared

My heard work is never enough

All there is left to do is suffocate

That was I'm Better Off

This was written in a very troubled time in my life, about 5 years ago, it's not the best, but the personal experiences behind it is what makes it special to me.





Why

Why does it have to be

Why me

Why like this

Answer that for me

Why

Why do people always do this

Why do people have to hate me

Why do they have to be so envious of me

Why am I supposed to be a perfect child

Why can’t I live my life low key

Why can’t I be who I want to be

Why this way

Why

COMMENTS

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LadyCara
02:47 Jun 23 2010

I think we all wonder to a certain degree WHY I am glad you did not quit writing i find all your entries are from the heart, and that is what makes a good writer.

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One of the only love poems I've ever written.



I took a step toward you

Knowing what I felt was so true

I loved you and only you

I know you felt the same

I did not care about anything else

You were the one

I came the next day

With a rose

The moment I saw you

I did not delay

I gave you the rose and said I love you

You took the rose and held it close

You told me you love me the most

Loving you is the only thing I know

COMMENTS

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LadyCara
02:40 Jun 23 2010

I love this one . this one is special.

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Going on this way has me trapped

I am down in a hole and still falling

In this pit of endless cold

There is only darkness

Shrouded by my hate

Hidden is my love

Burning inside

Under the anger

Under the sadness

Blood boiling and mind-numbing pain

Knuckles through the wall

Blood, sweat, and tears on my cheek

A ruined life

A broken heart

Forever dead

Forever spent

Forever

COMMENTS

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LadyCara
02:43 Jun 23 2010

I have felt like i was in a hole falling ,surrounded only by the darkness thinkingg my life was ruined because of a love gone bad. But it won't last forever......I Hope

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How long can someone live in unhappiness

How long can one look for happiness and never find it

How long

Can someone resist the depths of depression

How long before the dark void swallows their heart and soul

Can someone resist the temptation of suicide

How long

Before they breakdown

Before they become empty

How long

Will it take

Will they be lost and alone

How long

Does the confusion last

Does it take for pain to break a heart

How long

The eyes stare back at me

Eyes so empty

So lifeless

So full of pain

Eyes of darkness

Eyes of hate

These eyes are mine

What's becoming of me

A pit so black as the darkest sea

These eyes are mine

Those eyes shall weep

Those eyes shall bleed

But forever those eyes

Shall always be mine

COMMENTS

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LadyCara
02:45 Jun 23 2010

Very deep looking into your self I like this one to.

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There is an original to this but I don't know exactly where it is, if I find it, I'll post it.



WHEN I SMELL THE AROMA

THE AROMA OF DECAYING BODIES

I THINK ABOUT TIMES

TIMES OF MURDER

TIMES OF GRIEVING AND PAIN

TIMES THAT MAKE YOU WANT TO JUST BREAK DOWN AND CRY

TIMES LIKE THESE...

In the darkness he does hide

There he beckons me

Inside is where he resides

Inside my lonely heart



Always calling me

Trying to get me to sign

Says he wants to free me from pain

Although I know that is not true



His offer he says is on the table

Take it or leave it

Asks me if I want the world

Do I want to live pain-free



Tells me that I shall be a god among man

But there’s a price

Only a wee one

Something money does not govern



Temptation like none other

A thirst that needs quenched

His offer could be that nectar

But the price is so high



The greed inside me cannot resist

It whispers to me at night

Tells me to let go

All will be well



My heart pounds

It aches with a thousand pains

I know where it does lie

Though that’s where I die



Hands so cold as I prick my finger

Blood drips to the ground

His smile so wide as I sign

And it is done



As he promised the pain is gone

But I am not happy

All smiles have vanished

As I am left with only emptiness



And emptiness is all there shall be

For a man can only feel

Now I am no man

Just a vacant shell



I wear the disguise of what once was

A broken man

A lonely soul

But soul that is lonely no longer



That trickster does now hold

The very essence of me

What more can I give

Nothing, merely to fade away

COMMENTS

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LadyCara
02:54 Jun 22 2010

I really like this ....very nice

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This is called "Outside of the Inner-self" Enjoy



The dreams do haunt the sleeping mind

This darkness will consume the soul

That cold hate will swallow the heart

Will I fallback onto my feet again

Or will I forget how to stand

My faith will crumble

Hope will be obliterated by false acceptance

Will this destroy the life inside of me

Mind boggled by basic instinct

But the road never ends

An insight to a corrupt man

That sanity will be lost

There is a journey to absolution

At the end of that long highway is my utopia

At the end of that song is my pain

The guitar screech forever ringing in my ears

COMMENTS

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LadyCara
02:56 Jun 22 2010

I like this one to i think you are very talented. It takes alot to put oneself out there.

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FallenxPrincess
03:37 Jun 22 2010

I really like this one keep writting. You have got talent.

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