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See my days are cold without you But I'm hurtin while im with you And though my heart can't take no more I keep on running back to you See my days are cold without you But I'm hurtin while im with you And though my heart can't take no more I keep on running back to you Baby I don't know why ya treatin me so bad You said you love me, no one above me And I was all you had And though my heart is eating for ya I can't stop crying I don't know how I allow you to treat me this way and still i stay See my days are cold without you But I'm hurtin while im with you And though my heart can't take no more I keep on running back to you See my days are cold without you But I'm hurtin while im with you And though my heart can't take no more I keep on running back to you Baby I don't know why ya wanna do me wrong See when I'm home, I'm all alone And you are always gone And boy, you kno I really love you I can't deny I can't see how you could bring me to so many tears after all these years See my days are cold without you But I'm hurtin while im with you And though my heart can't take no more I keep on running back to you See my days are cold without you But I'm hurtin while im with you And though my heart can't take no more I keep on running back to you I trusted you, I trusted you So sad, so sad what love will make you do all the things that we accept be the things that we regret . See, when I get the strength to leave You always tell me that you need me And I'm weak cause I believe you And I'm mad because I love you So I stop and think that maybe You can learn to appreciate me Then it all remains the same that You ain't never gonna change See my days are cold without you But I'm hurtin while im with you And though my heart can't take no more I keep on running back to you See my days are cold without you Butm hurtin while im with you And though my heart can't take no more I keep on running back to you Baby why you hurt me leave me and desert me Boy I gave you all my heart And all you do is tear it up Looking out my window Knowing that I should go Even when I pack my bags This something always hold me back.





- someone reads this and you know exactly who you are (im to nice to say names) so this is my reply on that answer.



This falls into a story.



Im not really happy right now so thats the news for today.

I remember it all very well lookin’ back

It was the summer I turned eighteen

We lived in a one room, rundown shack

On the outskirts of new orleans

We didn’t have money for food or rent

To say the least we were hard pressed

Then mama spent every last penny we had

To buy me a dancin’ dress

Mama washed and combed and curled my hair

And she painted my eyes and lips then I stepped into a satin

Dancin’ dress that had a split on the side clean up to my hip

It was red velvet trim and it fit me good

Standin’ back from the lookin’ glass

There stood a woman where a half gown kid had stood

She said here’s your one chance fancy don’t let me down

Here’s your one chance fancy don’t let me down

Mama dabbed a little bit of perfume on my neck

And she kissed my cheek

Then I saw the tears wellin’ up in her troubled eyes

When she started to speak

She looked at a pitiful shack

And then she looked at me and took a ragged breath

She said your pa’s run off and I’m real sick

And the baby’s gonna starve to death

She handed me a heart shaped locket that said

To thine own self be true

And I shivered as I watched a roach crawl across

The tow of my high heel shoe

It sounded like somebody else that was talkin’

Askin’ mama what do I do

She said just be nice to the gentlemen fancy

And they’ll be nice to you

She said here’s your chance fancy don’t let me down

Here’s your one chance fancy don’t let me down

Lord forgive me for what I do, but if you want out

Well it’s up to you

Now don’t let me down you better start movin’ uptown

Well, that was the last time I saw my ma

The night I left that rickety shack

The welfare people came and took the baby

Mama died and I ain’t been back

But the wheels of fate had started to turn

And for me there was no way out

And it wasn’t very long ’til I knew exactly

What my mama’s been talkin’ about

I knew what I had to do but I made myself this solemn vow

That i’s gonna be a lady someday

Though I don’t know when or how

I couldn’t see spending the rest of my life

With my head hung down in shame you know

I might have been born just plain white trash

But fancy was my name

Here’s your one chance fancy don’t let me down

Here’s your one chance fancy don’t let me down

It wasn’t very long after a benevolent man

Took me off the street

And one week later I was pourin’ his tea

In a five room hotel suite

I charmed a king, a congressman

And an occasional aristocrat

Then I got me a georgia mansion

In an elegant new york townhouse flat

And I ain’t done bad

Now in this world there’s a lot of self-righteous hippocrits

That would call me bad

And criticize mama for turning me out

No matter how little we had

But though I ain’t had to worry ’bout nothin’

For nigh on fifteen years

I can still hear the desperation in my poor

Mama’s voice ringin’ in my ear

She said, here’s your one chance fancy don’t let me down

Here’s your one chance fancy don’t let me down

Lord, forgive me for what I do

But if you want out well it’s up to you

Now don’t let me down

Your mama’s gonna help you uptown

I guess she did

k so the movies playing and everyones half asleep than the actor said unwanted touches are molestation.



so i go over to jordan syers while the teachers gone and touch his ass than i get back in my seat.



about five minutes later i start crying and screaming so the teachers like what happend to her when i left?so than i scream I WAS MOLESTED and i start pointing at jordan and than i said HE MOLESTED ME!!!



so everyones looking at jordan like what the hell? and than the teachers like go to the counselor now shaina and im not moving than he comes up and grabs me by the wrist and i let out a blood curdeling scream and im like YOUR MOLESTING ME HELP HES MOLESTING ME!!!



so finally they get me to move out the room than i see my one ex and we have this joke about sex and all so i say HE!! HE RAPED ME RIGHT THERE PARKER RAPED ME!!! so now jordan the counselor principal teachers and students are like what the fuck.



so in the end i have a whole week of in school detention and i have to write apology notes to all the students i "disturbed"



o and the funny thing is that i kicked my teacher so hard that he has a red mark on his head yep i kicked him...after all he molested me

Ever since the beginning of time I have lurk this earth...but not by choice.

For I am a shadow, a sin, a forgotten one. I am a fallen angel.

We were all cast out...for praising Lucifer...the dark on, but I didnt praise him...I loved him.

He was the most highes angel in Heavan... was is the key word. For one day he came up to me.

"Shaina" he said " Im going to start my own kingdom. You shall be the queen, and we will rule more than God ever has"







- thats all i have so far. comment me if you like it and feel free to add me too (friends and favorite journel)



intill than

I am a fallen angel. Somethings i may not know about myself since everyone seems to have no spirit to tell me. But one thing I know is that I obeyed Lucifer and now, I've been here ever since.

I am sin. The other angels try to warn people but it just being human nature...they dont obey.

So they go to hell.

And in the end im the one to blame.

So heres a short warning to you might be able to see.

Dont you ever get to close to me.

I am a fallen angel. Somethings i may not know about myself since everyone seems to have no spirit to tell me. But one thing I know is that I obeyed Lucifer and now, I've been here ever since.

I am sin. The other angels try to warn people but it just being human nature...they dont obey.

So they go to hell.

And in the end im the one to blame.

So heres a short warning to you might be able to see.

Dont you ever get to close to me.

i cant decribe what im feeling right now.

one thing is for sure, its mostly the feeling of lust and loneliness.

the two l's

my friend kaylie and i had an inside joke on that.

but now shes dead

just like half of my friends

and whos to blame?

me.

just like always

becuase in this sick world they blame the freak

they laugh at you becuase you wear black and eyeliner

soon i'll be laughing cuase i stuck a bullet in their chest.