I sit in my dark, cold room in the middle of the night. I dit in the darkest corner with warm, wet tears covering my warm cheaks. I only had a little light from the full moon outside. In one hand, I had a knife and the other nothing, but sweet, warm blood. I cried when I felt the pain of the knife cutting my skin. When I hear someone walking down stairs I jump up and run to the bathroom. I quickly clean the blood off my wrist and the knife. Then i put the knife in my night stand and wrap the freash wound in a bandage. Then quickly go to bed.
When morning comes I try to hide the wound. Wishing that the nightmare would end. I got up and got dressed. Once done i go down stairs trying to hide the new wound with my long black sleave shirts with matching gloves. My parents don't ask whats wrong or what happened. They just go on and get ready for work then leave. I skip school and stay in the basement, trying to hide from the sun. When schools over I go up stairs and fo to my room. Thengrab the knife again. I hear voices ond laughter outside. So i looked outside of my window. I see my friends outside smiling, laughing, and having fun. I close my eyes and cry again. Someone walked in my room and grabbed my arm that had the knife to my wrist.
Then they took it away from me and threw it to a wall. The knife got stuck in the wall. I looked at the stranger wondering who it was. It was a dear friend of mine. I pulled myself up and hugged him crying. I felt the warmth of his body as he hugged me tightly. I could hear her breathing fast. 'he must have ran to my place' I thought. I heard him ask
"Why did you have the knive?"
Cause I feel alone, unwanted, and unloved." I said as i continued to cry.
"Your not alone. You have your friends and family. Your also wanted and loved. I love you." he said as he hugged me tighter again. I heard footsteps coming in my room andi felt other bodies hugging me. Thats when I relized I'm loved, wanted, and not alone. I'm never alone and I'm thankful
Why do people die? When do people die? Young, old what? I've seen pain my whole life,but this trigered the most pain. I've never cryed like this. I've been scared, i've been in pain, but this one is worse. My step-mom and her mom died in a fire this morning at one a clock. When i was getting ready for summer school we got the call. When i was told i cryed so hard then and there. i have never cryed like that my whole life. i just gotten used to my step-mom and her mom. i was used to their yelling, hugging, and what they buy me, but now their gone and i feel like i'm on the last string and if that string breaks then i'll lose control and i just don't want to lose that control. i feel like i lost everything, but i haven't i have my friends and family. and right now. i need them. i need their love and support. please help me. i'll try to find a pic of my step-mom and her mom, but i also may need to upload it. please i just need some luck, love, and support. if you don't then thats your choice. if you do then thank you. i'll try to help you when i can
My heart is aching just to be loved. My heart is also in total darkness were no light can reach it. Everyone hates me. All i want is to be loved before i die. People who was important to me died. My heart is torn and brused. No one can heal or fix it cause its to late. I'm in total darkness forever
Why is it that I want to be alone at times? Is it because i want to clam down or because i'm in pain? I don't know which, but i do know that being alone causes more pain. When you take a knife or a razor and cut, you'll feel the pain more then ever. You'll wish that you never had this kind of pain. Me i have this pain and I can't get rid of it. Its with me forever
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