Lonely Tylenol...23:26 Jun 04 2009
Times Read: 732
I figured I should post here after so long, not that anybody reads this anymore, you all probably thought I fell of the face of the Earth long ago. Im still alive, I have stayed away from the computer for a while because the death of a friend of mine kind of sent me into a depression. He killed himself and I was online with him right before he did it, I knew he ws upset and I begged him to not do anything, to call me if he needed to talk and I gave him Joe's moms cell number and asked her to let me know if he phoned. We talked and he signed off, saying he was tired and wanted to go to sleep, he said he was fine and not to worry for him.
I keep thinking I could have helped, said something to make him reconsider and I thought he was ok. the guilt I felt for so long after because i knew he was upset and I didn't do anything, I didn't try hard enough or I couldn't say the right words, i felt like it was all my fault for not doing these things. I sort f quietly lost it, deep depression set in and i just didn't care. I had been doing better, talking to people again, making an effort to try to socialize again. I thought I was getting better.
Then Sunday we found out a very close friend of my husbands had died, a boy he grew up with and considered a brother. he had been riding his motorcycle and a car pulled in front of him without looking. It makes me so angry! In Florida especially drivers need to look out for bikers, we have Bike Week here in Daytona every year, and Biketoberfest as well, and there are always lots of them around, yet things like this keep happening. Its tragic. He left behind 2 children and a wife.
that in and of itself is enough to be upset over, but then tonight we found out a close friend of both of ours died early last night. He was 52, a great guy and wonderful company, Joe worked with him alot and thy were very close, even if they were annoyed with one another Joe wouldn't just walk away because he wanted to look out for him, he was always working himself far to hard and Joe was afraid if he wasn't there he would work himself into an early grave, which is what ultimately happened. Rick was the kind of guy who would do anything for you and not ask for anything in return, and many times his generosity has saved my family from going hungry.
Joe's a quiet wreck right now and I think he is in shock somewhat, I plan on spending tonight trying to comfort him if I can. Keep us in your thoughts tonight, I have a feeling this isn't going to be a good week.
COMMENTS
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LadyxDarkxRayne
06:22 Jun 23 2009
Gives ya a big hug, so sorry to hear of all the loss hun.