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My Dearest Nick,

I don’t want things to be this way. I would do anything for you. Anything!! Do you understand that? If I could buy you the moon I’d pay for it with every last ounce of my being, Just to prove to you how much I love you, care about you, and need you. If I could paint the sky I’d paint it every last color my heart told me to and every last color you wanted. If I could take a star from the sky I’d do it in a heart beat even if it took every last minute I had left of life as long as I could get there and get back and still have enough time and breath left to tell you I love you that much. You always say you love me this (holding out arms wide) much… well it’s my turn to tell you I love you that much. Because if I had to swim across a thousand mile ocean to be with you I’d try even if I knew I’d never make it to you. I’d let the sea carry me away and use my last breath to pray to the God and Goddess that you would know I did it for you. Even if this letter is so absurd that you don’t think it could possible mean anything it means everything to me just as you do. I want you to be there for me. To hold me when I’m crying repeating over and over that you love me if you have to. I want you to be able to be there to kiss away my tears and take me to a place where bad things don’t exist for a moment just because I’m with you. I want you to be able to take my fears and throw them off a 100 story roof so they die a painful death and cease to exist. Never thinking twice of showing their horrible face in my life again. And to have you tell me that my fear of being alone will especially never come back because I’ll never be alone now that I have you. I want you to be that silver lining on those dark cloudy days when the pain is so intense I just want to be put out of my misery. And when I have no outlet for the pain and it just builds up inside so much that crying isn’t even enough… I want you to be my outlet. The one who makes everything sunny again, who takes away the pain and makes it possible for me to breath again. Because when all that pain comes rushing in on me I truly can’t breath. So don’t… Please don’t say we need to take a break. I’ll do anything for you if you change your mind about that. Because without you none of my dreams will come true. Without you I have no reason to buy the moon or paint the sky or capture a star. Without you there is no silver lining, no sunny days, no chasing away the gray gray sky, no kissing away my tears or banishing my fears or going to that place where bad things don’t exist for a moment. And without you I won’t be able to breath… just cry. So say you won’t do this to me. Not now… not ever! Say you’ll love me as much as there are stars, as true as the sky is blue, and as long as the ocean is wide. Because I love you… End of Story!

All My Love

Krystal (Your Princess)