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So it was a great Christmas. I, unbeknownst to me, was a good boy this year and received a small yet wonderful grouping of holiday schwag. I got a copy of the original "Wicker Man", a box of Frankenstein's Gummi Brains, and various other yummy sweets in my stocking. I also got Metalocalypse Season 2, and Star Trek Generations (or something like that title) video game for the PS2.



Best of all Vespers said that I and my family (now consisting of my dad, my brother, and his wife, at least now that my mom is dead) gave her the best Christmas she has had since she was a little child. I think that has to be the best Christmas gift of all, and I didn't even receive it. Fucking awesome.



So I'm off to get all sorts of fucked up and watch Metalocalypse Season 2.



Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night.

Chrsitmas time again and what should be gotten for whom. It is always such a hard decision. My 'Good' list is short this year so that rocks, alternately it suck because there are a bunch of people whom permanently relocated themselves to the 'Naughty'. And its not even the 'Good Naughty' list they have been moved to. There is only one person on that list and she proves to me all the time why she needs to be firmly placed there.



My head is hurting and I'm not even sure why. Its not a stress headache, which is my norm. Its something else. It feels as if my brain has been tightly packed in with styrofoam peanuts or something. It sucks.



We're running low on nicotine here and that always gives me a bit of the nerves. The alcohol we have shall remain untouched for it is much too early in the day for beer. Now if we had some Irish Cream or some White Chocolate that would be a different matter entirely. Spiked coffee is always a godsend. No fun smoke either, dammit!



This will be the first Christmas since my mom died earlier this fall. My dad seems to be dealing eith it well, at least outwordly so. He informed me what he shall be doing present-wise, and Wow! Its a far cry from what they would do for presents when my mom was alive.



My mom was never the best mom, but she at least always had what she would describe as my best interests in mind. At least that showed that she cared. But now it is becoming blaringly obvious that she was more of a Scrooge than I ever previously thought. My dad has been so much more generous with so many things since she passed that it really has brought these things out into a spotlight.



Life has not been the easiest since she died. I worked at the hospital that she died in and going back to work afterwords was always like being slapped in the face by the fact that this is where she died. It became entirely too much. So I ended up quitting the job I had there.



I was un-employed for a couple of months after that and now am working in a preschool. It is a bit of a refreshing change. A bit because I am the only male working there. And some of those women can be big bitches at times. And my girl works there as well, and she is having issues with some of them, as well. So what had been great is quickly slipping into more mundane bullshit.



Having a lack of money around this time of year is so fucking hard. So hard.



I'll figure things out. I always do. I always have.

COMMENTS

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Vespers
20:08 Dec 22 2008

I love you so much. I am so sorry if I have added to any of the bullshit, because honestly, I have. I have.



I am not the best by far, and I probably don't deserve you, but right or wrong, I am holding on to you for dear life, and I will never let you go.



I wish this job hadn't turned into what it has when it was so wonderful in the begining. But it has, and that sucks ass.



However, there are jobs, other jobs, to get by with until we move our asses to the coast. Because we will, won't we? We will. We will.



&heart;

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