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You know, I remember the day that Jason brought you home. You walked inside and we all thought that you'd be a little dog but there you were... 60 lbs of pure excitement. We were excited about you too.



Of course... you saw that new couch just sitting there and you had to mark it as yours. I laughed... dad didn't. You then became part of the family. I adored you... loved you more than you know. There was dad and you... that's it. The two men in my life and I was content.



I remember coming home from a horrible day at school. I was picked on yet again... and I walked into the house, cryin my eyes out. There you were... waiting by the door for me like you always did.



I tried to shake you away, pushing you quickly off of me when you hugged me the way dogs do. Of course as soon as you saw my tears, you werent going to just let me go. I ran upstairs before mom could ask me a hundred questions and you followed right after.



I was too quick though. I shut the door right in your face and fall on my bed, crying. You stuck your little nose under the door, waiting for me to open the door. After awhile, you started to whimper... and I couldn't take that.



So, I opened the door... hoping that you'd just lay on the floor quietly. Of course, that's not what you wanted. You ran into my room and jumped on my bed... restling in my blankets. At first I was annoyed, but after I got over it... I laid next to you. The warmth of your body made me feel safe and comfortable.



Before I know it, I'm out cold and probably snoring in your ear, but you never left my side. I woke up hours later to mom yelling that dinner was ready. I woke up and realized that you were laying there awake... waiting for me to move so you could. You were covered in my tears. Apparently I had cried in my sleep all over you yet you never seemed to mind. That wasn't the first time you did that... and certainly wasn't the last.



Just a dog you never was. Always more than that. Protector, best friend, family member, and comforter. You were many things to me... hopefully I was the same.



I remember the last time you got sick. You wouldn't eat... and I knew that something was wrong. I remember you laying in your bed... shaking and cold. I got a blanket and got on the cold floor with you, trying to keep you warm. Whispering that I loved you... and that I would do everything in my power to make sure you got well.



A couple of days went by... and no change so we decided to bring you in. I personally make it my fault that we waited that long. I thought that it was just a cold. I'm sorry... so sorry for waiting. Needless to say, it's something that I've never let myself forget. I see it as a flat out betrayal. I hate myself for it.



We had to leave you there at the vet... the worse thing ever, i think. I never should have let you go. You wouldn't have done it to me. Before I know it, I'm talking with my mother, who informs me that you had a stomach tumor and wouldn't make it through the night. I cried until I thought I'd surely crash the car.



Instead of rushing to your side, I went to church because I promised that I'd help with decorations. The whole time I cried... wanting to be with you... be there when you passed away. I told Melanie that I was going to the vet right after the church, but it got back to Corrine that I was wondering about how you were. She told me that you had passed an hour before.



I can't explain the pain that ran through my veins. I couldn't breathe... I couldn't speak... nothing. Everything was gone. I had nothing. I remember calling Jason and crying so hard that he couldn't understand me. Then when he finally heard, he busted out crying too.



I don't think anyone has ever loved a pet the way I loved you. You were more to me than I could ever even try to find words to explain. So much personality in a small being. I miss you... so much. More than I think I even realize. I miss the way I used to talk to you... and you'd listen. Or the way you'd comfort me when i was upset.... the way you'd hog all of the covers when you slept with me... the way you snored when you were tired... how you'd make me laugh by just being who you were... and for the way you loved me.



I love you... I can't say it enough. I hope that wherever you are that you're having fun. I know that I didn't make the best choices when it came to you. I feel like I let you down the last days of your life... and I'll spend the rest of my life crying over it. But if you knew me... like really knew me... you'd know that I'm not perfect... never claimed to be... but I loved you unconditionally. More than I've ever loved any bf... or many others.



You... me... that was perfect. Nothing can get in the way of how I feel about you. Just a dog some say... they're seriously mistaken. You are my best friend and always will be. Rest in peace.



All My Love,

~Sherry Lynn