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If I lose it all
08:02 Dec 29 2005
Times Read: 801

Take what you need 'cause I can't hold my breath

Say what you feel 'cause I got nothing left, oh

I made a promise to myself last night

I'm gonna keep it if it's wrong or right



And if I lose it all

There'll be nothing left to lose and I would take the fall

'Cause knowing you are out there breathing

It's so wonderful, it's a chance I take even if I break it

I lose it all, if I lose it all

Wouldn't matter anyway



Don't change a thing, perfect as you are

Time has a way, time is all I've got

If my heart should shatter watching you

That'd be one less thing I'd have to prove



And if I lose it all

There'll be nothing left to lose and I would take the fall

'Cause knowing you are out there breathing

It's so wonderful, it's a chance I take even if I break it

I lose it all, if I lose it all



Heaven will be waiting when I fall into your open arms

I believe you'll find me there

You'll find me there



And if I lose it all

There'll be nothing left to lose and I would take the fall

'Cause knowing you are out there breathing

It's so wonderful, it's a chance I take even if I break it

I lose it all, if I lose it all



And if I lose it all

There'll be nothing left to lose and I would take the fall

'Cause knowing you are out there breathing

It's so wonderful, it's a chance I take even if I break it

I lose it all, if I lose it all

Wouldn't matter anyway

Saying Goodbye
09:26 Dec 27 2005
Times Read: 816

Tonight I said goodbye to someone who has been part of my life for sometime, I didn't do this for anyone or to make the house happy! Infact I did it for her, to make her happy. She told me no she wont end it like this , we said forever! and cryed it was killing me to see her hurting and say this is what must be. This is why I did what I did, I belong to no one and never will. I am What I am and will always be this...thing she will find some one and move on and she will be happy. she says no not without me but I can never be what she wants!I can be what noone wants. I know this now! Talking to some I now know why they say that this is a lonly life.

I will miss her so much but it must be done...

Ashlee I will always love you...May you find happyness and love all your days.

Goodbye!

from a sister
02:23 Dec 24 2005
Times Read: 832










02:11:40

Dec 24 2005



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You are an angel to me.. I need to tell you what happend to me last night. The only good thing that happend to me.. First off, let me start by saying that I smoke pot. I like to smoke, have always smoked. It takes me inside my head. It helps me get away. Well, last night, I decided to just lay, in the dark. I had smoked alot. As I was laying there, it came to me. Before I got sick, I was awake. I did feed. I feed off of whom I wanted to and that was the end. When I got sick, it all ended. Could my soul possibly have been asleep all this time. For the last 6 years. I forgot who I was and what I was. I remembered all of it last night. Could I be awakening now. I am excited and disappointed at this possibility because of my illness. Before I could find that person I needed for the moment. Now I cannot. I feel as though I am going to be alone forever. But it was there, since I was a child.. I knew that it was. I knew I belonged when around certain things that others found abnormal. I am around them again and I feel it but cannot do anything about it. The thoughts in my mind were uplifting though and made me see. It wasnt a dream, I saw and I felt.. I was awake yet not here. That happens to me often, last night I let myself go with it and it took me. Thank you for listening to me...





your welcome my sister your words honor me.

Born to be KINGS!
07:52 Dec 19 2005
Times Read: 861

Here we are, born to be kings, We're the princes of the universe

Here we belong, Fighting to survive in a world with the darkest powers

Here we belong, fighting for survival

We've come to be the rulers of your world

I am immortal, I have inside me blood of kings

I have no rival, no man can be my equal

Take me to the future of your world

From A princess of Noctem Aeternus
08:55 Dec 18 2005
Times Read: 878

im getting sick of all the fucking bullshit in the house im tiered of hearing about how everyones fucking up and about travis whining cuz he got striped get the fuck over it! im sick of hearing about skid and his fucking up with the relic bullshit and im tiered of hearing complaints about deshler which arent brought to my attention im tiered of dave i'm tiered of joey im sick of it all but i have a solution either kill them all or start over......... ok im sorry we can probably find away to fix all this but im done with the bullshit and im not going to listen to it anymore it will be taken care of the right way cuz this on going crap is enough to make me gag everyone needs to grow up get there ass in gear or pack it up and move on if they cant live how they are supposed to then get the fuck outta here

what someone rated me
07:57 Dec 17 2005
Times Read: 882

KaosJester





Rating: 10

Comment: Phenomenal, truely unbelievable, i'm amazed at the way you have broken things down to an understandable form. For I am a christian, and yet i've always felt different from the others. I feel that indeed I may simply feed on emotion, any and all emotion, but in particular, it is chaos and anger that i feed off of. you my friend and brother deserve far greater than a 10, sadly this is all that i can rank you. peace homes

Date: 19:13:55 - Dec 17 2005







I feel honored

From a Sister words that give my dark heart a smile
15:27 Dec 09 2005
Times Read: 899

It is good to see you active on VR. I've stopped by your journal from time to time, watching passively as your trials through fire come along.



What have I seen? I've seen a fellow man grow in so many ways, virtues. Patiance, meaning of depths. It is a wonderful transformation, though I wonder if you notice?



You have my truest thoughts and hopes that things get back together. Please remember that when things go through fire, nothing comes out the same. This is true for transformation, growth and evolution.



The family that comes back to you will also have gone through their own trials, learning more about themselves. So when they come back, it will be stronger than ever.



As you know, they look to you for strength, patiance and fortitude. A living example, though not meant to be perfect. You are doing well for yourself, even in the darkest of times.



Be well, Brother Ryu

Seek solace in the dark season, and comfort in its blanket of ice.



Cordially

Lady Lilian

"Lilith"